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CLiT #5: Life, Love and Liberty
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* t h e p l e a s u r e z i n e + + m a d e d o w n u n d e r *
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! _Life, Love and Liberty_ !
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* Released 16.01.01 *
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! Webpage | http://thepleasurezine.cjb.net !
* Email | clit@hobbiton.org *
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!*! ( This Is The First Bit ) !*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
So, I was walking down the street at my computer and I decided not to write,
but it came out a bit more personal than I anticipated.
I'm sorry.
My writers are sheep, black and white and grey sheep, but there are only two
of them, because PipeScream isn't here. Where is he? I don't care.
Oh, but wait! Suddenly, there's a new contender! AlkalineAngel! Which means
I can have a black sheep, a white sheep, and a grey sheep! Joy!
Aerialisticish is the black sheep of CLiT, because I always have to tell him
to write. Bad Aerialisticish.
Asadersialle is the white sheep of the group, because she's innocent and
naive and pure. Heh.
And the new contender, AlkalineAngel? She's, um, grey, because... because she
is the offspring of Aerialisticish and Asadersialle!!
Heck, you can't beat creativity like that.
NB. I am turning over a new leaf and usual capital letters occasionally. Fear
me.
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^You're the magic that holds the sky up from the ground^
^You're the breath that blows these cool winds round^
^Trading places with an angel now^
-Ben Folds Five-
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!*! ( Stocktake Sales!! Never to be repeated again prices!!@# ) !*!*!*!*!*!*!
by
Aerialisticish
Insecure? Lonely? Opressed? Try our package deal - Life, Love and Liberty!
The three easy steps to contentedness. Works on both hard Work and Luck.
NOTE: This fix may not function properly with faster processors.
Also from SmugWare - The Values Pack: Including Faith, Integrity and
extensive documentation.
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^it don't mean a thing^
^if it ain't got that swing^
-Duke Ellington-
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!*! ( You ) !*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*! ( uoY ) !*!
by yb
AlterEcho ohcEretlA
You. .uoY
Smiling, laughing, winking; ;gnihgual ,gnilimS
Happy, pretty, crazy. .yzarc ,ytterp ,yppaH
You. .uoY
Giggling, chatting, dancing; ;gnicnad ,gnittahc ,gnilggiG
Clever, talented, cute. .etuc ,detnelat ,revelC
You. .uoY
Why did you destroy my world? ?dlrow ym yortsed uoy did yhW
Why did did yhW
You? ?uoY
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^weren't you the one who tried to break me with desire?^
^did you think i'd crumble?^
^did you think i'd lay down and die?^
-Cake-
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!*! ( Dammit, I'm So Bitter ) !*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
by
Asadersialle
Life sucks, it's not the big things so much, but the little niggling things,
that stay in your mind as you get on with what you're meant to be doing. Like
when the Love Of Your Life walks up to you and starts talking about something
you can't exactly hear, and so as not to look stupid, you just nod and agree.
Of course, he gives you a weird look, thanks you and walks off. You're busy
gazing after him, thinking of your future life together, when your best
friend comes up and tells you that you were just prompting him to ask the
bitch of the school out, instead of discouraging him like you normally do.
Then you kick yourself somewhere, and get on with the shocking life you've
managed to create for yourself... Of course you don't expect much from the
important things in life, as in the past they have permanently let you down.
You can't do anything you really want to do, like go to that concert, as that
requires freedom. Something which you don't have, as you can't legally do
anything worthwhile.
What's this about Life, Love and Liberty? Yeah, thought so... nothing, a well
conceived lie.
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^give me my money back^
^give me my money back^
^you bitch^
-Ben Folds Five-
!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
!*! ( And Why Am I Here? ) *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
by
AlkalineAngel
I don't know why I came, I'm pretty sure I never wanted you. Well, I guess I
did once but now? I guess I was just curious, just want to know why.
At five past eight I hear you before seeing your red prelude. Why couldn't
you come on time? I guess some things never change.
And we sit in your little red car, directly outside Strathmore station.
You lean in to kiss me. This time there is no more temptation, I evade you,
repulsed and you look shocked.
Yeah, I can see it in your eyes.
"How can you not want me? Look at my biceps, look at my car, look at my
earing as it catches the sun."
"I want an explanation." My voice is as cold as frozen ice, but don't I have
a reason to be? I guess you did mumble something plausible, and if I hadn't
been so set in my convictions?
Opinions? I may have listened and heard.
Maybe.
No.
I just don't want to hear.
_And Why Am I Here Again?_
And the car turns on and you're driving off, without even asking me - but
then I guess you never did, did you?
"I have a class at 9."
"I'll drive you to uni."
"I don't want to be late."
"You won't be."
Deep silence.
You have tears in your eyes and you're falling apart.
"I can't live without you," you say, "I can't. I'm dying here. I've never
hurt so much in my life."
Was this what I came to hear, to justify to myself that I was worth it or did
I just want to watch you squirm and make you pay?
Not being able to look into your eyes any longer, I blow some heat into my
cupped hands and rub them together.
And we're there.
You jump out already at your apartment door.
_And Why Am I Here Again?_
Life's just a big roundabout, and I take the same steps with the same
uncertainty. Except for that first time - I guess I was all for it then. And
I guess I liked it when you wanted me, the way your hands went straight to my
hips and travelled up
or down,
or in any direction,
It didn't matter then. No big deal I thought.
But it repulses me now, do you know that?
"Listen, I will make your life so happy. I promise. I've learned my lessons.
I'm never gonna leave you again. I'll give you everything you've ever wanted.
Please, I love you! I need you," you beg.
"But things are different now. You've changed." I say.
"So have you," you whisper.
Silence.
_And Why Am I Here Again?_
"Are you seeing someone, it's ok if you are, I know it's been a long time"
"No, it's nothing like that." Like it counts anyway, that's going nowhere as
well, yes let me just add it to the pile, I may as well.
And you try and try and try, aren't I wicked, I let you try but I resist,
it's not even the guilt that stops me, I guess I don't feel any, why should
I? He probably doesn't even care.
We never had anything to begin with, neither with you but not him either so I
guess it doesn't really matter. Does it?
_And Why Am I Here Again?_
And the drive to uni, you can literally feel the pain in the car, it's so
thick.
You bravely take my hands and run it across your face and hold it close, as
if it was the last time you were ever gonna see me.
"Can I call you sometime?" Your eyes questioning me.
I open the door and step out.
"I'll call you, give me your number." My voice is almost syrupy, you look up
with a glimmer in your eyes.
Yes, I can control my voice, it's not so hard you know.
And I punch in imaginary numbers. I feel the chill of the morning drizzle.
"I love you," you say.
"Goodbye," I whisper to the wind as you pull away.
Sometimes you only get one chance.
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^i was sure i heard you singing^
^while my head was broken up^
-Kula Shaker-
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!*! ( Will You Go Out With Me? ) *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
by
AlterEcho
Hello.
Yes, you. Remember me? We haven't spoken for awhile, I know. No, it's not
Michael. Close, though... Yes, that's right.
How have you been? Ahh that's good. You know, I've been thinking a bit about
you since I last saw you. What about? Nothing in particular I guess, just the
way we seemed to 'click'. You know? Maybe you don't.
Sorry, sorry. I guess I must seem a little bit strange to you, maybe a bit
kooky. Things just haven't been going great, that's all. Sometimes I just get
a bit down, sometimes a lot down. Like I'm sliding, sliding, sliding, maybe
not into a neverending pit of despair, but instead into a enormous bowl of
stale orange jelly. Still edible, but why would you want to? I don't like
orange jelly.
What was I saying? Oh, that's right. Are we friends? I really don't know.
Sometimes I get all paranoid, wondering if the people I talk to and hang
really like me, or if they all just laugh and bitch about me when I'm not
around. That really scares me. I mean, they've been great, and sometimes they
do really fantastic things and I'm like 'Wow, I'm so lucky to have you here'.
But then sometimes they'll do something totally obnoxious and won't even
realise later, and then I start to wonder...
It's not much of a life really.
So do you consider me a friend? Or am I just someone else whose path happens
to occasionally cross with yours? Cos I wouldn't feel too good if it were
the latter. That would mean that right now, you're just thinking to yourself
'When is this sadcase gonna leave me alone?' I know that feeling. You just
keep nodding, nodding and smiling, letting the other person keep talking,
just absorbing a bits here and there. I don't want to be that guy.
Yeah? Phew. That's a relief. I mean, no offence to you or anything. You've
never been nasty or anything, but people like me, we stress. Lots. You
probably don't stress much. What would you have to stress about? I mean,
you're smart, you're talented, you're funny, and you're popular, not that
things like that seem to faze you much. Plus you're attractive. Yeah, that's
right. I think you're kinda cute. Well maybe a bit more than that...
Shit, I haven't like overstepped the bounds of our friendship have I? You
just said we were friends, but I'm still not sure what sort of things I can
and can't say. But I really do think you're good looking, very sexy. Not like
Sarah Michelle Gellar sexy, but, yeah, I don't know. Cute. That was pretty
damn tactless, wasn't it? Sorry. I suffer pretty badly from foot in mouth
disease. It's a good thing I keep my feet clean and odour-free.
Any plans for the weekend? I don't know what I'll be up to yet. I'm not
working - I suppose my manager would prefer to have some of the other casual
employees working. See, I even get worried about things like that. So maybe
I'll just have a quiet one, just lounge about. There's not much to do at home
though, is there? At least, not at my place. Just watching TV, and sitting on
the couch. Not that I complain about doing either.
I wish there were a party or something happening. There probably is - I just
wasn't invited... I've never really been in the 'loop' or anything. Not that
I mind too much, it's just that being invisible becomes tiring after awhile.
Sometimes, it's just nice to know that someone recognises the fact that
you're alive, and they care.
But no-one gets everything they want. At least, not me. I can't afford it, I
guess that's the trouble. Or maybe it goes deeper than that. Probably, hey?
So, yeah. Another boring weekend for me. Maybe I could go watch a movie. I
haven't seen anything for awhile. I wonder if anything fun is out at the
moment... there usually is, I guess. If you don't mind Hollywood. Um, say, I
don't suppose you feel like catching a movie or something this weekend? Cos,
you mentioned you didn't have anything planned yet... oh okay. No that's
cool, I understand. Yeah, family bashes are can be annoying...
Yeah.
I guess I'd better head off. Lots of things to do, places to go, people to
see. Sure, I'll be seeing you sometime. Take care of yourself now.
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^something in the way she never looks my way^
^i'm in love, i'm in love^
^she doesn't hear a word i say^
^i'm in love, i'm in love^
-The Hippos-
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!*! ( This Is The Last Bit ) *!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!*!
That turned out kinda bitter didn't it? I'd blame overuse of capital letters,
but frankly, bitter is how it is.
*Sigh*
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|\/`:::::`\/| / Free Napster! \
_||\:''''':/||_ / \
/ || || \ / Free Kevin! \
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||`\\\ ///'|| / Free Timor! |
|| V || / |
`\\ .___. //' / Free AlterEcho! |
``.....'' / |
< Free Aerialisticish! |
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\ Free Asadersialle! |
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\ Free AlkalineAngel! |
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\ Free (C)opyright 2001 CLiT! |
\ |
\ Free http://thepleasurezine.cjb.net! |
\ /
\ Free clit@hobbiton.org! /
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