Bubblegum Splash!
This is a is a fan fiction by Mike Koos that places the cast of Ranma 1/2 into the Bubblegum world
Bubblegum Splash!
Written by Mike Koos
I guess you could say this is the work of a parallel universe. Maybe a rip in the space-time continuum caused the worlds of BGC/BGC! and Ranma 1/2 to collide... or maybe this story is just the work of a someone with a little too much free time on their hands. :)
******
Early one afternoon in downtown MegaTokyo...
At a recording session, Ranma is laying down a few tracks for her new single, "Love Letter from Jhusenkyou." Her band, Ranma and the Counterparts, is slowly climbing the top 100 charts in MegaTokyo, and things seem to be looking better each day.
Director: That's it! All done!
Ranma sighs, laying her headset on the stool. Her manager, Genma, applauds
as she leaves the recording booth.
Genma: You were wonderful!
Ranma: Oh...? You really think so?
Genma: Certainly! You'll be in the top ten in no time.
She smiles, laughing.
Ranma: I certainly hope so.
Genma: (with a gleam in his eye) I'm glad you're in a good mood. I've got someone I want you to meet.
Ranma: Hm? Ore ga...?
Genma: Now what did I tell you about talking like a boy? Wait here.
He reappears with a girl roughly about Ranma's age, with long reddish-black
hair.
Genma: Ranma, this is Ayumi.
Ayumi: ...Hello...
Ranma: Hi. (To her manager) What's she here for?
Genma: She's your new partner.
Ranma: PARTNER? Since when did I need a partner, *baka*?
Genma: Ranma, your temper...
Ranma: Shut up! If things are going so great, why'd you pull this on me?
She storms out, slamming the door - quite effectively. Most of the studio feels the aftershocks.
Director: ALEX! ARE YOU PLAYING WITH THE AUDIO LEVELS AGAIN!?
Genma: (to Ayumi) Don't worry, she'll get used to you.
Ayumi: (crossing fingers on both hands) I hope so!
Half an hour later, in a burger joint, Ranma is still fuming.
Ranma: Damn! (gulps down more of her hamburger) I should've known. (drink) ...Always does this to me... kuso-manager...
Voice: Ranma, is that you? It is!
She almost chokes, but thinks better of it. But when she sees who's approaching...
Kunou: Mind if I sit here?
Ranma: Whatever... I'm almost finished. Aren't you on duty or something?
Kunou: I, Tatewaki Kunou of the AD Police force, have finished my duties for the day.
Ranma: (rolling her eyes) Wonderful. Hey, aren't you going to call me, "pony-tailed girl?"
Kunou: Why would I do a stupid thing like that?
Ranma: (turning to her food) Just checking.
Kunou: MegaTokyo is beautiful at night. We could go on a date and I'll show you the splendor of it all.
Ranma: <On the other hand, some things never change.>
She gets up to leave.
Kunou: What about our date?
Ranma: Don't be silly. You know I can't be seen with AD Police officers.
Cut to Ukyou's aerobics studio, "U-chan." Today, Ukyou herself leads the instruction - in a leotard that would have most of the men in the class leering at her, if there were any. She laughs to herself at the thought.
At AD Police Headquarters, Shampoo is typing away at a computer terminal.
Shampoo: <Sheesh! Why do *I* always get stuck with Kunou's work just so he can go chasing after Ranma?>
Kunou's partner, Hikaru, walks by.
Hikaru: Doing Kunou's work again?
Shampoo: (pencil in mouth) Yeah. You're his partner, Hikaru, can't you do something about it?
Hikaru: I......
Shampoo: Aw, come on. Stand up to him!
Hikaru: Every time I do, he gives me that "Respecting your elders" speech... I don't know, I'm just not one for confrontation.
Shampoo: (winks) Then you're in the wrong business.
Linlin: Shampoo, you have a call on line two.
Shampoo: Thanks...
Shampoo: (answering call) Hello? Yes, it's me. ...No. Really? I'll be there as soon as I can. Bye!
Shampoo: Linlin, can you take over these incident reports for me?
Linlin: Okay!
Ranran: I'll help!
Hikaru: Something wrong?
Shampoo: (over her shoulder as she leaves) One of my friends is in the hospital!
Linlin: (whispering) Her friend didn't SOUND sick.
Ranran: (whispering) How many times are her friends going to wind up in the hospital?
Hikaru stands alone, puzzled.
Cut to Ranma on her motorcycle. She checks behind her; no one was following her. But Kunou had a habit of showing up when no one needed... er, expected him.
She pulled to a stop in the rear of the Silky Doll, Akane's lingerie shop. It was Ranma who had called in, otherwise they never would have found her on the road. Akane's younger brother, Ryouga, meets her at the door.
Ranma: What's up?
Whatever it was Akane had called in the Knight Sabers for, must have been important. Ryouga was clearly shaken, and considering his character something that upset him must be serious indeed.
Ryouga: Come in and see.
In the store, everything is a mess. Displays are overturned, windows are broken, and merchandise is everywhere.
Ranma: Not again.
Shampoo and Ukyou look through one of the broken windows.
Shampoo: Hey, what happened here?
Ukyou: It has to have been a boomer.
Shampoo: No, it doesn't.
Ukyou: Why not?
Shampoo: (grinning) Remember last time?
Ukyou covers her eyes, lowering her head in disgust.
Akane: Come on in.
They gather in the Knight Sabers' "headquarters."
Ranma: So, was it a boomer?
Akane: Yes. (stands) A rather small one, but a big pest, I'm afraid. It appeared out of nowhere and started grabbing underwear. Then it was upset that they hadn't been used, and went after the customers. That's when things started to get out of hand.
(6-plus second flashback sequence of the boomer going after the women, in an almost juvenile, but familiar manner.)
Ryouga: He threw me through a window with what looked like an old smoking pipe.
Ryouga: (staring) ......
Akane: (realizing what Ryouga is staring at) Cut that out!
Ryouga: I'm sorry, Akane-san. Excuse me, I think I'll go practice my martial arts techniques now. (He leaves.)
Akane: Okay.
Ukyou: So what are we going to do?
Shampoo: We have to make MegaTokyo safe for all women!
Ranma, Akane, Ukyou: ............
Ranma: Yeah. Right.
Ukyou: Sure.
Akane: This is serious! Who knows what kind of problems that boomer can cause?
Shampoo: I'll bet this is the work of that ex-Genom scientist, Kodachi.
Ranma: (snaps fingers) Hey, yeah, it does kinda look like it.
Ukyou: Well, what are we waiting for?
Akane: We don't have any leads. We'll need to do some investigating. But first...
Ranma: <Uh, oh...>
Akane: (produces food from nowhere) ...I'd like to know what you think of this dish I've created.
The three Knight Sabers look at the food, each of them fearing the worst.
Ranma: (backing away) I... uh, ate on the way here. Yeah, and besides, I've got to start looking for leads right away...
Ukyou: Right. I know a few places where we can start.
Shampoo: Hey, wait for me!
Akane: HOLD IT!!
Akane: What are you three so scared of? It's just food. Now sit down and try some.
Akane: I'm sure you'll love it! (leaves room)
Ranma, Ukyou, and Shampoo resign themselves to their fate and try the food.
Ranma: I had a feeling that's what it would taste like.
Ukyou: You too?
Shampoo: (sticking out tongue) She never even told us what this was.
Ranma: (low voice) I think I know the first place we should check.
Ukyou: Oh?
Ranma: The drugstore. I think I'll need some medicine to get over this...
Akane: (walks in) So how was it?
The Knight Sabers snap to and pretend to be enjoying - or rather, have enjoyed the food.
Ranma: Oh, it was okay.
Ukyou: Wouldn't change a thing.
Shampoo: ............ (passes out)
Elsewhere, at an abandoned warehouse overshadowed by the traditional ominous atmosphere...
Sasuke: Are you sure the Knight Sabers will know it's you behind the Happosai boomer?
Kodachi: Yes. You don't think they're as stupid as the AD Police, do you? I know what they're capable of.
She laughs, a hollow, grating laugh that echoes all around them.
Kodachi: (using throat spray) I love that effect.
Kodachi: It was because of the Knight Sabers that I lost my job at Genom. I'll never forgive them for that. No... I've got something very horrible planned for the next part of my plan...!
Sasuke: (shocked) You don't mean... Not the Azusa model boomer?
Kodachi: Why, Sasuke, thank you! That's MUCH WORSE than what I originally had planned!
Sasuke: It is? Uh... what DID you have planned?
Kodachi: You don't want to know.
Kodachi: Now get back to work. You still haven't cleaned up all those black rose petals yet.
[EDITOR'S NOTE: Due to problems with space and safety concerns, the scene which would be shown here - featuring the Knight Sabers putting on their hardsuits - has been removed from this version. It's also likely that this scene will be cut from a U.S. dub of Bubblegum Splash!, so if you can find an unedited version of this story, treasure it highly.]
The Knight Sabers search far and wide through the lesser-viewed parts of MegaTokyo for clues to where the scientist and her boomers are holed up. In pairs, Ranma with Akane and Ukyou with Shampoo, they check opposite ends of the city.
Ryouga: (over communicator channel) Akane-san! We've got a report of a boomer at the Fujimura recording studios.
Ranma: (gasp) That's *my* recording studio!
Akane: (solemn) Then we'd better get there right away. (Opening channel to Ukyou and Shampoo) Ukyou, Shampoo, how are you doing?
(Cut to Ukyou and Shampoo...)
Ukyou: Lousy. Especially since Shampoo had to have some donuts. (To Shampoo) How the heck do you always manage to eat those with your hardsuit on?
Shampoo: (swallowing donut) I thought you knew.
Akane: Just keep on the lookout. Ryouga says that Kodachi's boomers have hit Fujimura Studios. Ranma and I are on our way now.
Ukyou: Okay!
Ukyou: (Looking at Shampoo) *Coffee*, too!? How the heck do you do that?
Ukyou: (short pause) ...Hey, that wouldn't help wash the taste of Akane's cooking out of your throat, would it?
Akane: (over communicator channel) I heard that.
Ranma and Akane find the studio in even worse shape than the Silky Doll had been left in. Oddly enough, even though the damage was great, there were no signs of explosive force having been used - no burn marks, no bullet holes... But tiny fragments of glass lay scattered all throughout the broken shell that had once been a recording studio, flung far from the windows they had once been a part of... much like the studio crew which lay on the floors, even imbedded in the walls in some cases.
One of the technicians begins to come around, so Ranma pulls him out of the wall.
Tech: Huh, where... what... The Knight Sabers!
Ranma: Yeah, yeah. What happened here?
Tech: It was awful. (faint flash of recognition) Say, haven't I heard your voice somewhere before?
Ranma: I don't think so. Now what happened?
Tech: A boomer... looked like a little girl... we let her in. Next thing we know she's grabbing things and happily giving them names, and when we tried to stop her... (swallows hard)
Akane: Yes? Go on.
Tech: She started crying and screaming. At first it started out at normal levels, but it quickly became enough to shatter all the windows and blow the doors off their hinges. After that... I think I passed out.
Akane: Thank you. Mind if we look around?
Tech: No. Go right ahead...
Except for the sounds of armored feet crunching through glass remnants and
studio personnel finding out exactly which of their senses were missing, the
studio is almost deathly silent.
Akane: See anything that wasn't here before?
Ranma: (crouching over things on the floor) ...You mean aside from this letter of challenge from Kodachi?
Akane: How can you tell it's from Kodachi?
Ranma shakes the letter. A few dozen black rose petals fall to the floor.
Ranma: (reading the letter) "Knight Sabers! This is but an example of what I have in store for you. If you have the courage, come to the old abandoned warehouses on the waterfront."
Akane: Is that all?
Ranma: Well... (paging) ...there's about a page and a half of written-in laughing.
She shakes the letter again, and a few dozen more black rose petals fall.
Akane: It figures. Tell the others what we've got. I'll look for more clues.
Ranma: (over comm. channel) Ukyou, do you have anything?
Ukyou: A stomachache.
Ranma: Aside from that.
Ukyou: No, not really. I just don't understand how Shampoo can manage to eat more.
Ranma: You should try eating with my manager sometime.
Ranma: Anyway, we've been challenged by Kodachi to a fight at the waterfront.
Ukyou: The waterfront, again? Why does everyone always pick the waterfront? I'm still picking the fish scales out of my hardsuit from the last time.
Ranma: I dunno... It's gotta be a time-honored tradition or something.
Ukyou: (to Shampoo) (sighs) Come on, let's go. You've had enough cake for tonight.
At the waterfront, a small group of shadowed figures stand before a boat that is pulling in.
Kodachi: (calling to the crew) Excuse me, would you mind clearing out? There's going to be a battle here, and I don't want anything to get in the way.
Ship Captain: You're kidding, right? Ma'am, I suggest you clear out and let us take care of our business.
Kodachi signals to her boomers, who neatly take care of the ship by tossing it a few hundred yards into the ocean.
Kodachi: I hate it when no one listens to me.
Sasuke: (rolling his eyes) ......
Kodachi: The Knight Sabers and the AD Police are on their way. Everything is going according to plan.
Sasuke: The AD Police?
Kodachi: I needed a warm-up for my boomers.
Meanwhile, the Knight Sabers are making their way toward the waterfront.
Shampoo: (listening to the AD Police frequency) The AD Police are on their way to the waterfront! Someone must have informed...
Ranma: Kodachi.
Ukyou: Things are going to be a lot tougher with the AD Police getting in the way.
Ranma: Not if Kodachi's boomers get to them first.
Akane: That's what I'm afraid of. We'd better get there quickly and keep them from killing themselves.
Ranma: Even Kunou?
Akane: (thinking about it) Well...
Shampoo: (sternly) Akane...! Hmph! If he gets killed, I'll have to do even MORE paperwork. He'll be more of a pain dead than alive.
Ranma: <If you say so.>
Expecting the worst, a small contingent of AD Police has been deployed.
Kunou leads the way from inside one of the ADP's massive powered suits.
Hikaru: (driving alongside) Are you sure you want to go through with this?
Kunou: The AD Police have become soft. We must show everyone that we can handle anything that comes our way!
Hikaru sighs. Of course, Kunou was probably attempting to prove himself just as good or better than the Knight Sabers, or in the very least show off to Ranma, as well. But then again, Hikaru didn't understand why she simply chose to ignore Kunou, either.
The ADP arrives on the scene just minutes ahead of the Knight Sabers. Kodachi stands bravely out in front of her force, laughing mockingly all the while. Her voice was boosted electronically - not that she really needed it. Kunou, disappointed by the annoying racket coming through the suit's external pickups, wishes he'd come up against a bigger challenge.
Kodachi: You're late.
Kunou: I make my own schedule.
Kunou: The time has come for you to stop disrupting AD Police business with your childish rampages.
Kodachi: Speak for yourself, dear officer.
The Knight Sabers arrive.
Shampoo: We're too late...
Ukyou: Not yet. They're still insulting each other.
Akane: If I didn't know any better, I'd swear they were related.
Ranma: Shampoo, did you bring any popcorn?
Shampoo: Why are you asking me?
Ranma shrugs.
Kunou and Kodachi's insult match crawls on and on, as the onlookers on all sides settle in for a long, boring wait.
And wait.
And wait.
And wait.
Ranma finally switches her suit's external pickups back on.
Ranma: That does it! I've had it!
Shampoo: What are you going to do?
So...
Kunou and Kodachi are so involved in their insults that they don't notice Ranma come between them.
Ranma: (*very annoyed*) **SHUT UP!!!** Can we *please* get on with the fighting now? This OAV is only an hour long!
Kunou, Kodachi: ......
Ranma walks back to the other Knight Sabers, who are speechless as well.
Kunou is the first to make a move, drawing his powered suit's wooden sword and charging Kodachi and her boomers.
Kodachi: !!
She immediately recovers and sends a glance off to her right, signalling toward Kunou with her chin.
A small, shadowy form launches itself toward Kunou, who assumes a defensive position. The Knight Sabers move in at a distance, forming their own line of defense.
And then, the Happosai boomer notices the Knight Sabers.
Happosai-Boomer: (wide-eyed) Oh...!
The boomer starts toward the Knight Sabers, but Kunou places himself between them and the boomer.
Kunou: Halt!
Ukyou: How noble.
Ranma: How stupid.
This was very true, as the boomer didn't stop. At the last possible minute, he moves to leap over Kunou, tagging his head in the process...
...and knocking the ADP officer's powered suit flat on its back.
Kunou: (pulling himself up) How dare you...
He comes to the sudden realization that there is a low hissing noise coming from somewhere nearby. Kunou looks down at himself to find that he is holding a medium-sized firecracker/bomb.
[...boom!]
Kunou is sent flying into the horizon.
Ranma: Baka.
The Happosai-boomer continues to make a beeline for the Knight Sabers. Seeing this, Kodachi breaks into a megalomaniacal laugh. Hikaru, who had thought it safe to switch his external pickups back on, switches them off.
Akane: Look sharp, everyone! That boomer is still headed toward us!
But when they looked, the boomer was no longer there. Or approaching from any other way, for that matter.
Then Shampoo looked down.
Having completely removed the chest plate to Shampoo's hardsuit, the Happosai boomer was snuggling up to her.
Shampoo: KYAAAAA---!!!
Happosai: Beautiful young girls in armor - how sweet!
Ranma pulls the boomer off Shampoo and place kicks him in Kunou's general direction.
Ranma: Kono... HENTAI JIJII!!
Shampoo takes the opportunity to catch her breath, but it's short-lived as Kodachi orders another attack.
Kodachi: Get them!
Kodachi's boomers swarm out to greet the Knight Sabers with the Azusa-boomer at the front.
Azusa: Waah! Oh, how cute! Marianne, Charlotte, Katerina, Adrianne, won't you come home with me?
Knight Sabers: (shocked and repulsed) ......!!
Akane: (sighing) Knight Sabers, go!
The Knight Sabers contend with the boomers in the manner which they were infamous for. Ranma, on the other hand, is here one minute and there the next, putting hapless boomers who happened to be in her way out of their misery. Akane and Shampoo take the straight-on approach, while Ukyou attacks from a side angle.
Hikaru turns to see a bruised and battered Kunou limping toward their car, minus the powered suit he'd been forced to eject from. Once there, he stops to silently watch the Knight Sabers taking care of the boomers.
Hikaru: You don't have to worry. The Knight Sabers are taking care of everything.
Kunou: Shut up. Don't you find it dishonorable that the Knight Sabers take care of our problems for us?
Hikaru: Actually, I've come to expect it.
Azusa starts crying, a forceful blast that knocks Ukyou and Akane to the
ground. Shampoo pushes forward against the force.
Shampoo: ...unh ......maybe a counter-frequency...
She digs in as much as possible and starts her sonic counterattack.
Shampoo's alternating frequencies travel every which way between her and the boomer - any surviving boomers not overwhelmed by the hopelessness of the battle risked having their insides become their outsides.
Ranma saw what was happening and began to move closer, but several boomers appeared in her path to keep her busy.
Ranma: Kachuu tenshin amaguriken!!
She breaks into a series of rapid punches too quick for the eye to see.
Her close-fighting style caught the boomers off-guard; they had been expecting to keep a slight distance. No matter.
Okay, so it did matter. They weren't accustomed to this type of fighting.
Shampoo is knocked back a foot or three by the Azusa-boomer's wail.
Shampoo boosts her attack, though it still seems to have no effect.
Ranma: (over comm. channel) Maybe Kunou's voice would work better.
Shampoo: Cute. I could use some help, you know.
Ranma: Only if you keep that thing occupied. I've seen what it can do to a person.
Shampoo: I'm sure it isn't as bad as what happened last time...
Ranma: Nothing could be that bad.
Ranma: I'll be right back!
True to her word, she returns - hauling the remains of Kunou's ADP powered suit behind her. Ranma throws the suit near the boomer.
Azusa: Oh, what a cute little...
Azusa hugs the suit, calling it Francois.
Shampoo cringes; she clearly hadn't expected this.
Ranma had a quicker reaction time than her, and for the life of her Shampoo still couldn't figure out exactly why. In the time it took her to get over the sheer lunacy of the situation, Ranma was already disabling the boomer.
Azusa: Oh, what a beautiful explosion... KAWAII!! [Boom!]
Although the boomer itself was largely left intact, Kunou's powered suit had been completely disintegrated. Hikaru had to choke back a laugh - the ADP suits were *very* expensive, and Kunou was going to have to answer for throwing away a perfectly good one. Kunou glares at Hikaru.
Ranma: Ya...yattaze... that was fun.
Kodachi's voice rings out all around them, in stereo, surrounding everyone on the "battlefield."
Kodachi: I'm glad you enjoyed that!
Several dozen more boomers appear and encircle the battlefield's perimeter, the Knight Sabers and the remaining AD Police who hadn't left for less boring and predictable things.
Ukyou: Oh, geez.
The boomers tighten the circle, as those within shift to face outward in all directions. And from the midst of the ring of boomers, the Happosai boomer reappears.
Happosai: Ojou-chaaaaaaan!!!
The Knight Sabers collectively swallow hard. Before anyone gets close enough for hand-to-hand combat...
Ryouga: MATTE!
Ryouga leaps into the area between the two rings.
Akane: Ryouga-kun!
Ranma: Ryouga...
Ukyou: It's a wonder he found his way here.
Shampoo: (to Ukyou) Shh!
Ryouga: (to Kodachi and her force) How dare you change the rules of this fair fight!
Ranma: Well, it wasn't *exactly* fair... for the boomers.
Akane elbows Ranma.
Kodachi: Who are you?
Ryouga: A concerned citizen. And I shall never forgive you for trying to kill the Knight Sabers!
Kunou: (to Hikaru) You see? No one respects us!
Kodachi: You had better get out of here now, boy, before you get hurt. My fight has nothing to do with you.
Akane: (quietly, to Ryouga) Ryouga, go home. I don't want you to get hurt.
Ryouga: .........
Ryouga: (to Kodachi) It does now.
Ryouga: SHISHI HOUKOUDAN!!!
The energy builds to massive proportions and even Kunou and Kodachi withdraw from the sight. Just before the energy is about to explode outward in a column-like form, Ryouga notices what has happened to Shampoo's hardsuit... and gets a bloody nose.
**EVERYONE** gets caught in the explosion.
Much later, Kunou, Hikaru, and the rest of the AD Police peel themselves from the ground. Kunou handcuffs a dazed Kodachi.
Kunou: Where are the Knight Sabers... and that boy?
Hikaru: (standing over the words, "Knight Sabers" engraved in the ground) I don't know... but they left their calling card.
Kunou: They've done it again.
The AD Police leave, no one having noticed the engraving Shampoo had also left on the rear of Kunou's car, a silly face above the word, "Baka..."
<EPILOGUE>
Shampoo: I'm hungry.
Ranma: Just like last time.
Akane: (to Shampoo) Okay, but you're buying.
Akane: You're awfully quiet, Ryouga. Why did you come in the first place?
Ryouga: I couldn't let you have all the fun. Besides...
Ryouga: ...I was lost.
Ranma, Akane, Ukyou, Shampoo: !!
The Knight Sabers beat Ryouga up.
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Credits:
Apologies to: Rumiko Takahashi, Kenichi Sonoda, Hikaru Tooyama, and anyone else involved...
Special thanks to: John Boomgaarn, Ed Little, Sarah W., and the others (you know who you are!).
Posted to r.a.a.s. by:
Questions, comments, suggestions? E-mail me at the addresses below.
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Mike "Ranma Saotome" Koos (AKA "Ayumi Fujimura")
FIDO: 1:203/955 | Prodigy: MPJW20C | Internet: ranma@aco.com
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