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. . . . . . mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
. . . . . In dedication to
. . . . . . mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm everyone who was lost
. . . . . or lost someone
. . . . . . mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm September 11, 2001:
. . . . . Anada 437
. . . . . . mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm "A Brief History of America"
by Effy
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
09/30/01
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Once upon a time, there was a huge, democratic country called the
United States of America, more easily identified as the clever, catchy
acronym "USA." The USA was founded by a bunch of white Protestant men with
buckles on their heads, eradicated from Britian for their asinine, illogical
religious beliefs. They sailed across the Atlantic and founded Jamestown,
only for most of them to die during the first winter due to the lack of
necessary self-sufficient skills such as farming, and conservation. Not to
mention many of them probably died from sexual repression, except for the
occasional Native American woman lured into the settlement.
Eventually, the men from Britian were saved by the Native Americans,
who showed them how to work the land. The British Protestant dimwits
thanked them by slaughtering them mercilessly and claiming all of their
land, eventually, not to mention the scattered discrimination and
stereotypes permanently diffused into their existence. And not to mention
the African slaves, who were herded like black sheep out of their homeland
and shipped overseas in sweatbox boats filled to the brim with their own
feces only to lead a life of unrewarding servitude and become victims of
racial discrimination for years to come. The prosperity of plantation life
in the New World, the life's blood of the birth of American economy, could
have NEVER flourished if early Americans had not robbed the Africans of
their home life and culture.
So not much more than 100 years after these crazy, white, religious
freaks infested one of the few remaining pure lands in the world, they got
totally pissed off at Britian stuffing laws and restrictions up their tight
Protestant asses, and revolted lamely by dumping a bunch of imported British
tea off the side of a boat. One thing led to another, and pretty soon the
Americans were fighting the British for independence, now oblivious to the
fact that they were simply a republic of Britian, full of mostly British
people. Regardless, the Americans won in the end, probably because learning
self-sufficience and constantly having to defend their rights and land
taught them how to fight the pansy British army.
And thus, the United States of America was founded. A few white
Protestant men signed the Declaration of Independence, and to this day the
vast majority of all US presidents have been Protestant. All have been
white, Christian men, who swear to equality and opportunity for everyone
(except when it comes to government positions, the jobs that define the laws
and standards by which we live by). Therefore, another element of hypocrisy
is embedded into American culture (in case you didn't pick up on all other
others).
Men who fled Britian in the 17th century fled from religious
persecution. They came here and burned witches, even people who were merely
accused of it if they did not practice it. They preached opportunity, and
discriminated against everyone except other white, Protestant men. They
spoke of freedom and enslaved Africans. They dreamed of owning their own
land, and drove the Native Americans to the farthest corners of the country,
until there was nowhere left for them to carry on their traditions.
Then some people finally got a bright idea that slavery was WRONG!
Then came the great Civil War, of course. The Southerners fretted about the
economy of their plantations, while the Northerners pointed out their
hypocrisy. Of course, the Northerners won the Civil War, and the result in
fact did NOT hurt the economy, but helped it flourish even better with the
large number of African workers, who worked hard, and worked diligently for
men who had enslaved their forefathers. To this day I feel sympathy for
them because a large portion of their culture and heritage was completely
reversed by a few white, Protestant dipshits.
It only took about 200 years for a good number of Americans to
realize what the USA is truly about. It only took a terrorist attack on our
biggest city for people to realize the stupidity of any kind of division
among American genres of people, be it race, political party, social status,
and a zillion other things. Finally, when our own safety is threatened, can
people actually pull together, united. I hear all these things on the news,
yet I don't see them as easily. All I see is a barrage of American flags
everywhere, reminding me constantly that I'm a citizen of the most
big-headed country in the world (except for maybe China). I don't see how
9000000000 flags on every block is going to stop the suitcase nukes, the
spray bottle of anthrax, or the death of American soldiers who are only
truly appreciated by their comrades and families, which is maybe like 5% of
the population. I don't understand how people can't see that the $30 flags
with the little suction cups so you can stick them to your car are all part
of the boost the economy is getting off of all this hype. America is once
again cashing in on tragedy. The United States is united in one purpose:
making money. Keeping capitalism going, so we can continue this lifestyle
filled with unimportant shit. If we get bombed, our economy falters, people
die, and the snobbish lifestyle of America will not be maintained. I
perceive this as the view of the government, anyway. I perceive the view of
the average citizen as simply being "I don't want to die."
And I don't want to die either, and that's why I'm as much a
hypocrite as the next American. I can bitch and moan about the way this
country runs itself, but when it all boils down, I don't want to see a damn
thing changed, because I enjoy my lifestyle for the most part. See what
those white, Protestant, conniving buckleheads have done to us? They've
handed us a lifestyle of supposed freedom on a platter, offering more than
any other nation, but still enslaving us to a system based on greed, and
founded by hypocrites. And NOW they're cashing in on our PRIDE! What TRUE
American would SELL an OVERPRICED American flag at a time in our nation's
history like this?
Patriotism, the newest money-making fad.
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. . .------
* * ------ by Effy (c) anada.net 09/30/01
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