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anada324
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.* O . . .. ..O .. 324 28 Mar 2001 ) ( ')
.* O O* o o o o o o o ( / )
* ***O O O O O O O O O \( _)|
* O o o.*..o.*..o.*..o. .net "Serial Killaz" *
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* /,`.-'`' -. ;-;;,_ *
* |,4- ) )-,_..;\ ( `'-' by AphexTwin23 *
* '---''(_/--' `-'\_) *mE0w* o
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'Anada is cat-friendly..o*`
It's been so long since I've written that I don't even know where to
begin. I've forgotten how to write... not like I ever could to begin
with... it's just now I don't think I can even make up enough bullshit to
fulfill someone else's needs. But hey I might as well try.
So I began to write the other day...for my first time in this new
year. I began to write about my favorite serial killer, which happens to be
the all too famous fictional character Hannibal Lecter. His voice is what
attracts me the most. His gentle soothing voice and the way he goes about
at ease. But then that whole thing wasn't working out for me so I thought
some more... and I came to this:
My favorite "serial killer" would have to be my ex boyfriend. He's
known by some as "Speed Racer" or "Bartholomu" but his name really isn't
important because I'd rather him not be a part of my life anymore.
Unfortunately, you can't change the past. But anyways.
So it's so funny how one day, out of the blue, he changed from the
happy flower child prep to being Mr. Rebel. He went from being the Tommy
Hilfiger geek with big glasses to the sexy "gothic" poser with a trenchcoat.
His trenchcoat is like a symbol. In my eyes I see it as being the most
important thing in his life because everything revolves around it.
How me and him came to know each other all started as a big joke. He
had never been on a Real date and neither had I. So we went on what some
may say a real date. And that led to a relationship if you can even call it
that. If you call him threatening to kill me and wanting me dead every day
a relationship. But, of course, it was all only a "joke". Right.
He gave me a picture of himself (wearing all black) which read
something along the lines of " I want to fuck you up the ass with a knife
and tie you to my bed and eat your heart " or something like that. Then the
second picture he gave me (him wearing a Tommy Hilfiger tshirt) read
something like " I love the backstreet boys and I want to be a football
star". And that, right there, is pretty much his whole life story. His
drastic change.
He used to be such a loser. I remember him living up the street from
me though I never talked to him... he was such a dork!... then he bought a
trenchcoat, a spiked bracelet, and started spiking his hair. He was
suddenly sexy and all the girls began to flock around him. They all started
to dress like him wishing he was theirs. It was like a cult.
I went out with him... I saw he had no personality what so ever and I
broke up with him because, on top of that, he was an asshole who knew
nothing along the lines of relationships.
After we broke up he became worse. He is now taking on the role of a
serial killer. He bought a leather trenchcoat and a fuckin machete! He
started drinking, smoking cigars, testing the limits of his car and his
life, carrying a knife around, etc. He's living a fantasy. All he does is
walk around saying "hey guys I'm going to kill you... but i got to go get my
trenchcoat first because im part of the trenchcoat mafia" "want to come out
to my car and ill stab you with my machete"... it's kind of like in the
movie The Crow when the guy gets stabbed and says "you got blood on my
sheets!" That's my ex right there. He could care less about himself but if
you got his trenchcoat dirty or blood on it... he'd come after you.
Yea and then his mom thought that I was on drugs. What the fuck?!
She thinks that I'm a big time stoner because I, get this, was wearing
black. Again I must say... what the fuck...? Shouldn't they be concerned
about their son who suddenly transformed one day. Shouldn't they be
concerned that he may be the one who's going to blow his brains out.
Instead of just assuming that his current girlfriend was a stoner because
SHE was dressed differently the first day they met her. Ahh stupid.
The sad thing is that he transformed his, once cool, friend Mitch
into a poser as well. Mitch became him and now they are one. Mitch used to
be a good guy. He used to be unique with his wild dragon shirts and tiger
stripes and whatnot. Now he is nothing. He now sports a leather trenchcoat
as well. You will only see Mitch where there is my ex.
I come to school lately and now it's like everyone just changed one
day and started being "goth". And then they prance around and make a big
deal about it. Like yea ok that's cool sure. But then they all are stuck
on themselves and talk about their new style more than anything else. And
they change their attitudes from the fun-loving living in the clouds
attitude to the "i have to be a rebel now because i wear black" attitude.
And it makes me sick.
For example: IT'S ALL HIS FAULT. Look what happened. He used to be
a total nerd and that's cool that he became a sexy bitch and wants to wear
black. But he doesn't have to go around and decide that he has to drink
now, and race people in his car, and skip classes, and talk about his
trenchcoat constantly.
That's cool if all the chicks want him now that he's sexy. But come
on! Not only do they want him... all of these preppy chicks are wearing
black now because HE does and they hope that maybe, just maybe, he'd be
interested in them. And maybe, just maybe, they were wrong. Because he's
GAY. I have no problems with homosexuals but that's got to be the answer.
All his little wannabe girlfriends are all like "im goth because i
bought a pair of black pants at american eagle".
Ahhhhh! I'm so sick of this whole goth issue. GOTH IS DEAD ROCK IS
DEAD WERE ALL CLONES. And now are you going to think I'm a complete
hypocrite the next time I wear black?
His whole new attitude was only as deep as his new outer appearance
from the start.
His little chicks are all like "He's so mysterious" or, "He is so
hot", a few girls would squeel in my classes.
Now I realize it. America. Capitalism. They were looking at his
clothes.
What really bothers me is that he really does have the power to be
creative and interesting as far as communication goes, but he doesn't
because he only realizes the reaction that the girls gave him when he first
showed up with that strange attitude, and the black trench-coat.
No, not a trench-coat, a duster. But, I won't condem him too
quickly.
He still has a chance. I beleive that his downward pull has to do
with his parents being so hard on him for his low grades, which is a circle
going down to start.
As far as Mitch, Hes still way cool. He needs to get through some
personal problems.
You see, I think that the trench-coat he bought symbolizes
togetherness, or being a part of a group of people (which he's never felt in
the past).
But, 9o percent of the time I wish if he'd just die. Just leave the
face of this earth. I hate him. I want him dead. If I had a gun he'd be
the first to go. He's such an asshole...with his skankish ways. He's
pathetic. The way he attempts to make me jealous... as if I'd EVER make the
mistake of liking him ever again.
And he hangs all over that Melissa chick or whatever her name is as
if she's the best thing ever created. They're perfect for each other.
They're both so stuck on themselves that they don't see how stupid they
look. The funny thing is that he would have never talked to her before his
transformation and she would never have talked to him before hers. He only
talks to her and hangs around her because guess what... she bought a
trenchcoat.
The dead cow smell swarming anyone who walks by them. It's
disgusting.
He's so stupid. God I once thought he had potential. I once thought
he was intelligent but that he just didn't apply himself. I now see I was
wrong. Because he's not at all smart. He's a fuckin idiot. He gets more
stupid by the day. I should keep track of his stupid remarks each day.
It's sickening. Uh!!!! I hate him!
Fuckin wannabe serial killer.
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( o.o ) (c) Anada e'zine anada324 by AphexTwin23 o
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