2112 014

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

2112

 · 5 years ago

  

I will break the door of hell and smash the    
bolts; I will summon the dead to eat food 
with the living, and the living shall be 
outnumbered by the host of them. 
-The Epic of Gilgamesh 
   ÜÜ                              ÜÜ  
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³ ÝÛÝ ÝÝ     Þ  ÞÞ   ÞÞ  ÝÝ     Þ  ÞÛÞ                               ³ 
³ ÝÛÝ       Üþ  ßÛ   ßÛ        Üþ  ÞÛÞ  Sliver                       ³ 
³ ÝÛÝ    ÜÝß    ÞÞ   ÞÞ     ÜÝß    ÞÛÞ                               ³ 
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   ßß                              ßß   Volume I, File XIV [062895] 
                                        Writer: Rosewater 

  
A sliver of spinach sat intimidatingly on his upper front  
teeth.  He wore a new Armani suit, had perfectly slick hair 
and the aroma of an expensive after-shave circling about  
him, but the bit of vegetable on his dental works  
detracted from these would-be positive aspects of his  
appearance to the point that he seemed less attractive  
than the gangly, buck-toothed MIT graduate sitting across  
the crowded restaurant.  His lunch companion noticed it,  
but out of fear of a social faux pas, she kept quiet.  He  
tried to impress her and went on and on about his  
supposedly important corporate occupation, his new  
sportscar, and described, in specific detail, the "deal"  
he had just wrapped up with a Japanese company, generating  
a large profit for the company, and possibly a promotion  
for himself.  During the course of his spiel, he never  
noticed the food on his teeth.   

She did, of course.   
  
All she could do was nod and half-smile, the way polite  
people do when they really don't care what someone is  
saying and are preoccupied with other things, like  
spinach, for instance.  The spinach was now ingrained to  
her psyche, stuck there like an embarrassing piece of  
toilet paper on the sole of your shoe after you leave the  
restroom that you don't notice until after fifteen  
minutes of snickering from strangers in the adjoining  
tables.  
  
"You should have seen me," he gushed, overconfidently.   
She attempted to turn her attention away from the leafy  
green goodness that perched atop his pearly whites by  
nervously fumbling through her purse.  She tried anything,  
so long as it might keep her from glancing at his mouth.   
His stories were boring, making the situation worse.   
Nothing else could keep her attention away from the  
intense carnage of vegetables in his orifice, and it ate  
away at her.  She squirmed in her seat, trying to avoid  
the uncomfortable situation.  
  
With each passing glance, the smidgen of flora seemed to  
increase in magnitude until it was the size of a cow.  It  
spoke to her in a stage whisper: "Come here Susan.  Stick  
your fingers in his mouth and pull me right out.  You know  
you want to."  It was tempting. However,  she refrained from  
performing an all-out assault on him.  What stopped her,  
she didn't know.  
  
After much nervous twitching, she attempted to tip him off  
to the atrocious particles of leafy greens that had taken  
a permanent residence between his two front teeth. 

She licked her teeth, hoping he would see it and  
self-consciously perform the same task himself, thereby  
eradicating the entire uncomfortable predicament.  No such  
luck.  She tried again.  Once again, nothing.  For a short  
while longer, she again attempted to ignore it, but the  
sliver clenched at her throat and showed no mercy to her  
weakening manners.  
  
Then she saw her chance for salvation.  From the haze of  
the restaurant came Beano, their waiter.  Perhaps he could  
help.   

"More water, sir?"  Please, please, say yes.  Wash that  
stuff away.  Oh, God, please.  
  
"No thanks, just a check."  
  
She fell heartbroken.  Out of desperation, she performed  
the same tooth-licking operation, but he had no response  
to her silent pleas.  Her entire life had been filled with  
tragedies, but none more agonizing than this.  She had no  
where left to turn.  Her mind was a frenzy, her thoughts  
confused, everything became one large blur.  Then, out of  
complete frustration, fear, anger, and discomfort, she  
blurted.  
  
"Hey, you've got something on your teeth."  
  
He licked the incisors, and presented them to her for  
inspection.  "All clear?"  
  
"Yeah."  

 
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