Impulse Reality 066

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

Impulse Reality

 · 5 years ago

  

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  _I_R_ |    ||    |\    \ 
   M E  |    ||    |/____/       Comments 
   P A  |    ||    |\    \       ir file number 066 
   U L  |____||____| |____|      released 11.02.00 
   L I  |    ||    |\|    |      by nawleed 
   S T  |____||____| |____|      we're just fucking with your mind. 
   E Y   even_god_reads_it 

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	James was explaining to Stevie about comments. (good beginning.) 
	So see, he said, see here, hey, pay attention. Yeah? OK, so look at 
what's written here. It says "wider margins." What do you think that means? 
Uh no, that's no good. Start over. (what is the purpose of this sentence???) 
	YEAH? WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING MISTER, MISTER, MISTER GIVE UP 
& START OVER! What? (this is difficult to make sense of) UH YEAH WELL NEVER 
MIND THEN. I can see you've been under a lot of stress lately & let's go out 
for coffee some time. I don't like coffee, no free time, etc., etc. 
 	HEY (why is this capitalized?) have oyu (you?) ever noticed how 
people take for granted that little kids are real, real stupid? I mean like, 
most folks are amazed to find out that young children actually NOTICE things. 
The average age at which most people lose their virginity is 16 years and 5 
months, so if you were born May 28th, 1984, TODAY IS YOUR DAY! (funny, but 
what does it have to do with anything?) From his spot on the sofa he shifted, 
and replied, in a disgusted sort of voice, gosh, I'm way overdue. What do you 
think that means? (what is the purpose for the lack of quotation marks around 
dialogue?) 
	tHE NEXT DAY, SHE CAME OVER TO MY HOUSE AND WE "HUNG OUT" SO TO 
SPEAK. wAIT, WHAT THE HELL AM i TALKING ABOUT? (fix that caps lock!) Uh yeah, 
I know, I'm pretty darn clever (that's what SOMEBODY ELSE said, by the way! 
I do not really think I am clever!) You should read WINE FOR DUMMIES sometime. 
It's a classic. Hyuk hyuk. 
	(good humor) HEY YOU FUCKING SLOB, WAKE THE FUCK UP! LOOK AT ME! IT'S 
NOT ME YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT'S \YOURSELF\ (yeah ok i see how it is) LOOK 
AT ME! LOOK AT ME WHEN I TALK TO YOU! (uh) YOU HAVE TO TALK MORE ABOUT  
YOUR/SELF/! (watch your language, mister) LET'S HAVE A DRINK SHALL WE? 
	So anyway, yeah, hello? (this is unnecessary) Anyway, when Stevie and 
Jamesey were children, their relationship was closer than the average 
friendship between 7-year-old boys. Plus, the kids really got a kick out of 
how similar their names were. They'd sing that song, you know the one, 
"STEVIE AND JAMESEY SITTIN' IN A TREE, K I S S I N G," and so on. The words 
sounded good to them. They got goosebumps singing that song more than once. 
They didn't really hate Stevie and his friend; they just didn't understand 
them. At least that's what Jamesey's therapist said, 17 years later. 
	Two young, middle-class suburban teenagers met at the coffee shop to 
sip iced cappucino drinks and discuss the evils of mass consumerism. I went 
on POLITICALLY INCORRECT WITH BILL MAHER and talked about it. You can imagine 
what happens next. 
	YEAH I'D LIKE TO MAKE MY MARK ON THE WORLD I'D LIKE TO DO SOMETHING... 
SOMETHIGN /SIGNIFICANT/ MAN!! THIS PLACE IS SO SMALL I=T'S LIKE THE WALLS ARE 
CLOSIN' IN! HELP ME ESCAPE! THANK YOU & GOD BLESS! (check the spelling on 
this paragraph.) nothing should come after that! can you see just how 
REBELLIOUS I am being? I AM TOTALLY PUSHING THE ENVELOPE. 
	Whenever I would voice my "opinions" (?) on the subject I would get 
people saying I was brilliant. I was a revolutionary. I was the ONLY FUCKING 
PERSON ON EARTH with such original, innovative ideas! I would've been 
flattered if I didn't know what fucking PHONEYS they all were. Too many of  
'em, man. Too many god-damned communists in America. absolutely crazy. 
	And so on. 

	(Bill- good story, but the somewhat ABSTRACT (i added the capital 
letters myself!) nature of it makes it somewhat difficult to understand. plus 
you can't think of good character names. may i ask what it was about? was it 
about how people generally believe whatever sounds good? how THE MEDIA is 
destroying american culture? about how water is the only way to go in terms 
of beverage choices or did you not have a specific focus? please tell me 
because i am INTERESTED Bill! (is that your real name?) 

	SPELL CHECKERS ARE GREAT & \*/_USE THEM!_/*\ !!!! -Rachel) 

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