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Anada 099
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## ## ### I S S U E # 0 9 9 0 7 - 1 5 - 0 0 ### ####
### # ### #######
#### ### "aNAda: Behind the True Hollywood Biography" ###
####### by Phairgirl
####
Another Night and Day Alliance e'zine: it was born from the
decimation of HOE e'zine. It didn't do anything particularly innovative.
It brought together some of the greatest in slightly-more-than-mediocre
talent in the 'zines scene and managed to change absolutely nothing. But
the story behind aNAda's conception, rise, fall, and ending triumph is
nothing short of an epic tale. Today, aNAda's tale will finally be told:
ANADA: BEHIND THE TRUE HOLLYWOOD BIOGRAPHY
It all began on a simple Pentium III in the middle of nowhere,
Dubuque, Iowa. Phairgirl had been on The Internet for a good number of
years, but had never been a part of the 'zine scene until very late 1998,
unfortunately, long after its decline. She wrote for and later edited HOE
e'zine (http://hoe.nu), and later was ousted along with much of the 'zines'
staff in an attempt to invigorate the 'zine and the entire scene in general.
And with that, the idea of aNAda was born.
Phairgirl met up with many of her ousted HOE compatriots: Effy,
Seaya, Big Daddy Bill, Uberfizzgig, Mutter, and Oregano, as well as some of
her other old friends Jphish and Devon, and decided to carry on the HOE
legacy as something only somewhat different. They recalled times of when
text files weren't just crap, but a conglomeration of actual readable text
and interesting ranting. In fact, they remembered back in the day when
people actually attempted to write something they felt they could be proud
of, no matter what the subject or style.
Plans were set into action. anada.net was bought. Web design was
made. The staff was brought together and began churning out ASCII. The
release date was set to February 1st, 2000. And there was no turning back.
aNAda began with five simple text files and a dedication to the
inspiration behind its name of Another Night and Day Alliance: Mr. Kevin
Moore, former keyboard player for Dream Theater and current man behind the
project known as Chroma Key. The webhits were plentiful. The feedback was
supportive. aNAda had no reason to think that any of this would fail.
Then, tragedy.
As the days and weeks trudged on, aNAda suffered ups and downs in
their web statistics. Some days would be bountiful. Others were downright
pathetic. Phairgirl did what she could, posting to numerous bulletin boards
and e-mailing random parties that seemed as if they could do the 'zine some
good. In the end, a few more writers joined the project and the hits began
to steadily grow, but it just wasn't enough.
To compensate for their lackluster presence, Phairgirl turned to
alcohol. Days and nights would pass, and she wouldn't even notice. She
curled up with her stuffed Pikachu and a fifth of Jose Cuevo, losing herself
in her stupor. Jphish turned to pantheism for consolation, starting a cult
and avoiding the mess that was aNAda. Effy started smoking crack and
spending weeks at a time staring intently into her toilet. Mutter gave all
of his money to Bill Gates and moved out on the street where he spent months
babbling incoherently. Oregano moved into a small wooden hut in the
backhills of Montana and began experimenting with bomb ingredients he had
learned by reading _Fight Club_. Big Daddy Bill sought inner peace and
became a Buddhist monk. Uberfizzgig became obsessed with his quest for
knowledge and began doing crazy experiments to enlarge his brain. And Seaya
moved to New York City, registered as a Republican, and began working for
The Man to increase the power of The Man.
Even the newer recruits were losing their grip. Sabazio suffered
a severe blow to the head after attempting to recreate the van-surfing scene
from Teen Wolf and falling off while doing a handstand on a curve while
travelling 30mph, causing him to forget aNAda ever existed. Jason got a
prescription for Prozac. Alek's girlfriend was attacked by a mentally
handicapped individual and devoted all of his time to her recuperation.
TanAdept stopped petting Anna.
Yet somewhere, a bright beacon of hope continued to flash at the
aNAda staff, silently pleading with them to come to their senses and carry
on. Issue 100 is approaching, it would say. Barryploegel.com wasn't the
end of the webhit extravaganza, it would say. YOU HAVE ONLY JUST BEGUN, it
would say.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, HOE, aNAda's predecessor and wartime enemy,
decided that years and years of their mounds of textfile madness would come
to an end. Not only did they announce their own untimely end, but they also
conceded in their war and gave much-deserved props to their bastard love
child, aNAda.
And just as suddenly, the staff woke up. To celebrate, plans were
made to bring Anna to MadIguanaCon to ensure that she most certainly was
petted, and piles upon piles of text was written.
Today, aNAda continues to grow, staff continues to be added,
submissions continue to be submitted, the mailing list continues to grow,
psychotic people continue to leave voice mail, and the list goes on and on.
Will aNAda last forever? Maybe not, but for now, it is leaving its mark.
****************************************************************************
# (c)2000 aNAda e'zine aNAda099 .*. by Phairgirl #
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