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Anada 004
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A A N N A A D D A A
A A N N N A A D D A A
A A N N N A A D D A A
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A A N N A A D D A A
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A "The First and The Last" aNAda #4 A
A A
A by Big Daddy Bill 02/01/00 A
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This is the only thing I've wanted.
To kiss you, or to have you, or to need you.
How many times have I said it?
You haven't listened, or even watched my lips move.
Now the air is thick with isolation.
Everytime I take a breath, I slowly sink into my shadow.
The fall leaves laugh and play in the yard.
While the cars noisely chatter and brush by each other.
I am so alone. I am so afraid.
And the coldness that's curling up inside my bones...
chills my heart.
I feel like I'm standing on a bustling street,
screaming at anyone who walks by,
and they turn a deaf ear to my ranting.
I have a point. I have had a point before.
Now I try and make assurances that I can't even believe.
I stutter and trip over the errored words,
and they fall nonchalantly off of my tongue,
so rough and dry with aspiration.
You figure it out. You let me know.
I couldn't even make you happy.
What use am I to your shapeshifting ways?
How can I even be a man in your eyes?
When all my questions are answered,
my happiness will come from within.
And finally, I will be at peace.
But I know better. I've wondered too much
too fast.
And done nothing at all.
Eventually, even the sun will disappear.
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{ (c)2000 aNAda e'zine * * aNAda004 * by Big Daddy Bill }
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