Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter 005

eZine lover (@eZine)

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VAS

 · 5 years ago

  

ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» 
º ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ ßÜ     Û ÛßßßÛ Ûßßßß ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ º 
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º ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ ßÛ Û   Û ÜÜÜÜÛ ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ º 
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º                Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter #0005                 º 
ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ 
º      Date Released : [05/12/92]       Author: The Gas Station Attendant     º 
ÇÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĶ 
º                     Some Fun Stuff You Can Do At School                     º 
ÓÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄĽ 

        Aghh its me again, here with some more sick and twisted text for all 
you freaks out there. I guess our first issue was pretty sick, so I'll try 
to keep this particular issue a little tamer... Anyhow here are some good 
suggestions for the uncreative person to try at school... 

1] Go to school naked. 

2] Slay a bunch of squirrels, rabbits, cats, dogs, cows, horses, people, etc, 
   and scatter the dead mangled bodies all over the front couryard of your 
   school and draw pentegrams with either blood or red spray paint. 

3] Draw a white chalk outline in on the front sidewalk of school and pour 
   some ketchup in the middle of it, rubbing it down into the cement to 
   create a nice stain. This will look an awful lot like a murder scene. For 
   added realism steal some construction tape <the stuff they put around 
   your driveway when you get it repaved> around it to make it look like 
   a police line heh. 

4] Wait till you have a substitute teacher, have the whole class except for 
   one person you hate come 15 minutes late to class. We did this once, and 
   then you all rush in at once running so he cant mark who all is tardy heh. 
   Just tell him you were there and that he must have missed you. 

5] Get mail order crickets <these can be had for about $14/1000 mail order 
   or around $1.50/dozen at local pet stores> and bring them to school, 
   letting them loose during lunch or something, they look an awful lot 
   like cockroaches. 

6] Start writing and passing around an underground newsletter containing the 
   numbers of phone sex, look up all your principals and teachers and put 
   them in there too <be careful not to leave too many clues , i made this 
   mistake once, i put a bunch of my teachers and my principal, i got a 3 
   day suspension, but oh well>. Of course you need racist articles and 
   stories about fags at school and spreading rumors that people have aids 
   and shit (People are easily maniupated by the press). 

7] Bring some sort of farm animal to school , and try to get a visitor's 
   pass for it <tell them its your cousin from alabama or something>. Or 
   you can just let it loose in the hallways and watch the chaos. Dont 
   get a dog or cat, they are too 'cute' .. and too expensive. Get a pig 
   or better yet , wait till thanksgiving, find a local turkey farm and buy 
   some turkeys. Snakes, Mice, and squirrels will just get stepped on or 
   picked up by some teacher. 

8] Come to school late, break into someones locker, pack it full with those 
   damn styrofoam peanuts, crumpled up paper, underwear, used condoms, shit, 
   grass clippings, but make sure to pack it TIGHT. Now take lots of newspaper 
   and duct-tape that over the opening, while the locker is still open. Now 
   use caulking and seal the locker airtight. Of course you want to cover the 
   front with balloons, and put a padlock on the handle so they have to get 
   it cut off. 

9] Go around, get behind people when they open up their locker, and watch 
   them enter their combo. After they leave, write the combo in LARGE letters 
   with a black permenant marker, or better yet, carve it in with a knife. 

10] Shit in the sinks in the bathroom. 

11] Fill the drains of the sinks with toilet paper, and just turn them all on, 
    and take off... after a while there will be quite a flood. 

12] If you have the nerve to do this, when giving an oral report in front of 
    the class, just piss your pants, or drink caster oil and make yourself 
    vomit all over the place. 

13] Put superglue and tothpicks in the locks of your classes before school. 
    I would suggest the 5 minute 2-ton epoxy glue, it dries quite quickly, 
    make sure to get all the rooms around it so it doesnt look like it was 
    all singled out. 

14] Take bleach and write nice messages on your schools front lawn. Be sure 
    to use lots of bleach and make big letters, this works quite nice by 
    leaving dead brown grass wherever bleach was pored. 

15] Take a garbage can full of broken bottles and spread them all over the 
    football field, next time someone gets tackled, they get sliced and 
    diced into confetti. 

16] Order pizzas to your principal. Amazingly enough, most pizza places will 
    deliver to schools. <I was present in my school office when 8 large 
    pizzas came into the school to the principal heh>. 

17] Steal a carphone, and if your teacher has his own office with a phone, 
    discretly dial the phone, and call his office. Then give him death 
    threats, tell him when he leaves the classroom after this hour he's dead. 
    of course ALL suspicion will be off you since you were sitting in the 
    class the whole time heh. 

18] Check out library books <lots of them, big expensive ones, encylopedias, 
    atlases, etc> in other students names and burn them. You will probably 
    need their student id# to do this, just look in the teachers grade 
    books. 

19] Spend some time in the AV room switching all the geography movies with 
    such fine movies as "Deep throat", "Debbie Does Dallas", "Calugila", etc. 

20] Do book reports on such fine reading material as the Kama Sutra, or 
    Everything you ever wanted to know about sex. 

21] When you have subs for your last class of the day, wait till they take 
    attendence and just leave. I have done this before, sometimes if you 
    skip, they dont even mark you absent even if you never show up. This 
    works best if you have a class where everyone is up and moving about, 
    like metal shop or art class or something. 

    I hope you like some of these ideas, if we get any requests, I can print 
millions more. These are just suggestions of stuff you can do if you want to 
have some fun. I have done 4,5,6,9,11,13,14,18, and 21. The rest are up to 
you to try... 

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