Underground Legion of Terroristic Research Activists 02

Published in

· 5 years ago

  

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How to Terrorize a Car by Agent Cyclone / Ultra       07-March-1991  
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Why terrorize a car?  
  
In America, the car has become a symbol of freedom. This has come to represent  
breaking away, the open road, and speed. So when one asks, "Why terrorize a  
car?", the answer seem quite obvious. If you antagonize a car, or destroy it,  
you help to destroy someone's freedom. Of course, the obvious reason for this  
action would be to simply piss someone off. Some of these steps will help you  
accomplish one, if not both, of these objectives.  
  
  
When, and where to terrorize?  
  
I suggest that the best time to play with a car would be from dusk to about  
10:00 P.M. Now you are saying, "What a suprise." Well, obviously, you want  
some night cover, but you don't want to look too suspicious.  
  
I used to believe that mall parking lots were good for this, if you knew who's  
car you wanted to hit, but the increase of mall security in my area has led me  
to believe otherwise. I find it quite easy when the car is parked in an alley,  
or on a back street. This is a judgement call, you decide. Just don't do it in  
broad daylight next to a retirement home.  
  
  
  
What to do to the car?  
  
There are thousands of thing you can do, just use your imagination. This is a  
list of some of my favorites. They range from pissing someone off, to doing  
some major damage. I avoided mentioning the obvious (slashing tires, removing  
distributor caps) because I think most of us know how to do that.  
  
Rocks in the hubcap - This works on older cars with the pop-off caps. Take the  
cap off, and put in a few rocks. Whenever the person drives around, they will  
here noise. It will drive them nuts trying to figure out what is wrong. "Gee,  
is that my transmission?"  
  
Superglue Locks - Just like it sounds. Take some superglue and fill all the  
locks in with it. By the time the owner gets to his/her car, they won't be able  
to get in it.  
  
Brake Fluid - If you have time, you can let the brake fluid drain out. Just  
find out where the resevoir is, and let it drain. After a few times of pumping  
the brake, they won't have any. Then they will have to learn about strategic  
down-shifting. Make sure it is not a disc-brake car!  
  
Loosen Lug-Nuts - On many economy cars today, these are exposed. Just loosen  
them until they just sit on the lug. Then after a few tire rotations, that  
baby is free to go where it wants to.  
  
Muffler Clogging - This technique, made famous by Beverly Hills Cop, works  
better with a large wad of paper towels rather than bananas. I have found it  
is more effective on the women drivers. It seems they are less inclined to  
look at their tailpipes than their male counterparts.  
  
Of course, there are a thousand more. If you have any ideas, let me know. I  
can be contacted at Blitzkreig (502)499-8933.  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: This is for informational purposes only. If one acts upon this  
information, they do so under their own risk.  
  
 Agent Cyclone / ULTRA productions