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Underground eXperts United File 421

  


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Underground eXperts United

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[ How Do One Find New Friends? ] [ By Knyttet ]


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How do one find new friends?
written by Knyttet


I have been trying to find new friends by the
way I know best, writing. It sounded like a
good idea when I started but when I had thrown
away all the drafts and the bin was starting to
get full I realized that it wasn't so easy.
How much of yourself do you want to leave out
to a stranger? How will you feel if you don't
get any replies? And what if the reply you get
is from someone who sound like a total madman?

I have always been a bit selective about my
friends. Maybe that's why I don't have that
many. But I prefer to be lonely than to be
surrounded by total idiots. There are always
books if life gets too boring.
Well, back to the friends business. It was so
much easier when you were in school. You met
people more naturally. Now you meet people
where you work but sometimes you need someone
to talk to that does not talk about your job.
Or to gossip about how it is where you work
(it's a myth that this is an urge that women
have).

The thing I hate most about getting new friends
is that it takes so much time to really get to
know someone, to start to trust someone so you
can tell/show them who you really are. And
maybe they can't take that, maybe they don't
like what you really are at all and run away.
Then you have to start all over again.

I think it's more complicated to find new
friends than new lovers. When you start to love
someone (get attracted to someone) then it's
not necessary the things you have in common
that's important, it's more a feeling.
Attraction.

But with new friends you mostly start out with
something you both have in common, some kind of
mutual interest. And if you are unlucky after
awhile you will find out that this was the only
thing you had in common. If you are falling in
love with someone you don't have to have
something in common, except for the attraction
but with friends you got to have some things to
talk about. It isn't enough sitting on the
couch holding hands and looking in each others
eyes.

Maybe I'm too "choosy," but that's the way I am.

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uXu #421 Underground eXperts United 1998 uXu #421
ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/uXu
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