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Toxic Shock 052
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\ \.::::::::./ / ::::::::: ytinretE fO ertneC ehT
\::::::::::::/ ::::::::: duaB 42/21 7475.255.516
::: :: ::: :::::::: seliF astoL sgeM 04
:::::::::::: ::::::::::::::: ST dna SET fo sretrauqdaeH
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:::::::: ::::: !won dekcuf yllaer mI zeeg hO
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/::::::\ ::: egalliV eramthgiN roduT
_/ / \ \_ ::: duaB 42/3 1706.829.516
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Holy Fuck! It's Toxic Shock!
Gosh Batman, how'd you know?
Look over there! It's their mascot!
_ _
)) (( Daniel Boone was a man...A mighty big man...
((________))
\ / But the bear was bigger so he run like a nigger
Smiling \ \ / / up a tree!
Satan \\__//
The _\__/_
Preppy __/\\//\__ You think you're EVIL...but you're NOT!
Punk / \__/ \
/ / \ \ (____) (____)
/__/ANARCHY!\__\ Mooooooooooo! \ / \ /
// \\ It's a goat head \/ \/
// ________ \\ you dipshit!
..................... (____) (____) But Batman, isn't that
\ / \ / the same thing those
__ __ \/ \/ dudes in The Coven used?
\ \ / /
\ \ / / Elementary, my dear dumb fuck!
/ / \ \ They joined the Toxins!
/ <______________> \
\ __ __ /
\ __ \ / __ / Gadzooks! It looks like something from a
\ \ \ \/ / / / Judas Priest album!!!
\ \_\ /_/ /
Die \ _ _ / PEACE LOVES DOPE
Die \\\____/// Who annihilated...this week?
Slay \\_XX_//
Kill \____/
Drink \ / Why you're a regular party machine!!!
Virgin \/
Blood!
A R E Y O U
F U C K I N G
R E A D Y ???
Behold Ye Peoples Of The Earth, Followers And Nons Alike!
The Beginning Is Nigh At Hand For The End Has Come And Passed!
When The Upside-Down Strawberry Shortcake Falls, Burnt, To The Ground
When Marauding Bands Of Cabbage Patch Kids Destroy The Cursed IBM
When Rainbow Bright Appears, One Foot On Land, One Foot In The Sea
And Throws Green Moldy Five Year Old McDonald's Hamburgers On The Shore
When There Is No Racism Because All The Niggers And Chinks Are Dead
When All The Men Grow Huge Titties Because It's A Manly Thing To Do
When The State Of Tennessee Is Nuked Right Off The Motherfucking Map
When All Realize Coke Is Better Than Pepsi But Jolt Is The REAL Thing
When Dominoe's Realizes That Their Pizza Really Sucks Shit
When That Goddamned Rabbit Finally Gets His Stinking Trix
When The Sun Turns Purple And Sets In The South At 8am Eastern Standard
When The Finally Turtles Grow Up And Elvis Presley Actually Dies
When Trump Proves To The World That Money DOES Buy Everything
Then...Then and ONLY then...Then...ummmmm...errrrr...THEN...well.....
hmmmmmm......Then, I guess, uhhh....
Ah hell, I dunno, we'll find out then!
The Toxins...Meet The Toxins...They're some really spaced out anarchists!
Toxic Shock P R O U D L Y Presents
The Longest Pre-Title Bullshit Ever Done By Anybody!!!
Greets And Wishes For A Nice Warm Death Go Out TOOOOOOOOOO
The Dirts of TNV
And that's ABOUT FUCKING IT!!!!!!
Feel LEFT OUT?!?!?!?
Wish YOUR name or group could appear in OUR greets?
TOUGH FUCKING SHIT!
You think we're going to WASTE our VALUABLE space with STUPID FUCKING
COMMUNISTIC FASCIST DONKEY DICK SUCKING ASS BITING OZONE DESTROYING MONITOR
POLLUTION BULLSHIT LIKE A GODDAMN GREET LIST?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!!!
And NOW... What you've ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL been WAI-TING for!
New! Improved! Drastically Reduced In Price! It's Now Or Never, A ONCE
In Eternity Offer! The Hottest Thing To Hit This Planet Since The
Atomic Bomb! It Is...The One...The Only...
.
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Yes! Does your tampon hurt like a motherfucker? Does putting it in make
you want to rip out your ovaries and dangle them from your clit, grow hair
on your chest and drink Schlitz just to be something besides a Woman? Do
you hate that squishy feeling you get between your legs when your pad and
tampon just aren't doing what they should and the blood just starts sloshing
around inside your twat? Does it really piss you off when those cramps grab
ahold of your vagina and make you think giving birth to a calf would be a
pleasant experience? DON'T YOU JUST HATE FEELING LIKE SHIT?!?!?!?!?!
Well TOUGH SHIT. Think you're so damn grand because you can give milk
out your tits? Hey, so can a COW. I notice a RESEMBLANCE, bimbo! Proud to
be a woman? Proud to get bloated, just like a week old carp? GOOD! Look
at all your wonderful fucking benefits! Damn! Wish I was a woman so I
could have PMS!!!
Oh Fuck! Here it comes now! PMS! I've got it! I've got it!!!!
Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!
It's...It's terrible...It's the worst thing that's ever happened to me!
Oh God NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Bloody Afterbirth And His Multiple Personalities
P R E S E N T
PMS : Post Mortem Syndrome
Toxic Fucking File Number Fucking Fifty-Two
owT gnikcuF ytfiF eliF cixoT s'taht ,daer gnikcuf t'nac uoy esac nI
FUCK SHIT DAMN PISS HELL CUNT DICK COCK TWAT
If I knew what the hell I was fixing to write I'd write a decent
little comment thingie...But since I don't, I won't! So THERE!!
NYAH! My girlfriend puts out more than yours does!
No you idiot, she bleeds more when she's on the rag than yours does!
TAWT KCOC KCID TNUC LLEH SSIP NMAD TIHS KCUF
Yeah...PMS...Sneaks up on you real fast, doesn't it? And it's
predictable...Predictable as a man getting a hard on when confronted by a
horny nude lady OTHER than his wife...Right on time, just like clockwork...
Once EVERY lifetime, that shit hits...The ol' Post Mortem Syndrome...
You know what I mean...It always starts off with that sinking feeling..
As if several big burly men were lowering you down into a pit...Come to
think of it, that's EXACTLY what happens!
Of course, we both know that that wouldn't be so bad, except that they
stuff you into this ritzy box that some clown has filled with his garbage,
like you're some kinda landfill or something, and the box is cramped and
tight...And then they dump dirt on you and shit, so the air kinda gets a
little stale in there.
Which wouldn't be so bad, if it wasn't for that putrid stench of rotting
flesh that pervades the air after a few days...And with nowhere to go, that
smell just keeps right on circulating in that tight little box, getting
worse and worse until finally you just get used to it...
And, since ya get used to it, it isn't so bad, is it?
At least, it isn't until the organs start to rot, too...The flesh, yeah,
that you could handle...but the organs? They hurt, don't they? Starts out,
just a low throbbing ache, but OH when it gets going full blast! Ouch! You
know what I mean... The tissue turning green and getting as moldy as it
can, shrivelling up as it absorbs its own water for some unknown purpose...
Then all the cells start dying and they contribute to the Overall Smell Of
Things... Ya start to feel a little empty inside. . .
But hey, we've all rotted before, right? Ya get kinda used to that after
awhile, besides, there's only so much organ to rot, know what I mean?
And then, the Great Intelligence Of The Earth decides that you just can't
be comfortable rotting as you are, so it sends along the Welcome Wagon to
help you rid yourself of your flesh just a LITTLE BIT QUICKER... Yeah, the
worms...Never quite get used to maggots crawling around through your flesh
and tissue, gnawing away at your eyeballs, sucking away at your muscles,
merrily munching away, mangling your manhood...
Efficient little fucks, ain't they? Before too long, you're all bones.
Hell, maybe nature has an excellent diet program that we just haven't
thought of using yet...
They leave ya alone for awhile...Nails getting kinda long, ain't they?
Be nice to bite the fuckers, but hell, ya have no muscle anymore, can't
really move your arm...
Then they come back. Hmmmm, they act like they forgot something...
And they find it quickly...Yeah, you shoulda known...They squirm around
and get into your bones, greedily lapping up all that delicious bone marrow.
Maggots running through the inside of your ribs...oh what a feeling, huh?
Whew! Holy shit! What's that smell?
Oh hell...You forgot about that garbage...You place the smell...
Yep..There it is...
That bozo that dumped his trash in your coffin musta had a bitch of a
wife, made him throw away his pornos...There's one right now, a nice
centerfold...You'd have a boner now if you still had your prick...But the
smell...Yeah, you see what it's coming from...Damn bastard jacked off and
juiced up the pages of the mag...Nothing like rotting cum to soothe the
decaying homo sapien, eh?
Hmmm, what's that sound? Light thudding coming from above...Oh shit!
Must be your wife! Damn, quick, gimme a come, can't let her see me with my
hair like this!
No, can't be her..What's that? Oh shit...OH SHIT...NO!!
It's a fucking dog sniffing around! Damnit it stops on your grave...You
hear the sounds...Oh fuck...Oh fuck! Damn thing's pissing on your
headstone! You try to scream, but alas, the vocal chords are one of the
first things to go, remember?
Well..Hell, you're dead, what does it matter if a dog pisses above you..
Above?
Oh no! Yep! Here it comes! Trickling slowly down through the soil and
right through what used to be the lid of your coffin..Nice warm smelly dog
piss, all over your slowly crumbling bones...Damn damn damn! Gone are the
smells of rotting flesh, only to be replaced by a stench not even a skunk
could love! Oh geez oh damn oh SHIT..!
Well...at last...all of that's over...now maybe a cadaver can rest in
peace around here...
But wait...What's that?
Hmmm, that's one you're not used to...Sounds...sort of...like a...
A SHOVEL!
Oh JESUS! Somebody's digging down to your coffin!
Oh shit oh shit oh DAMN! Here it comes!!
AHHHHH! It hits a femur, disintegrating it!
"Ohhh WWOOWW!! Lookit lookit! A dead dude! Killer SHIT!"
Oh fuck oh hell...There's a whole damn GANG of grave diggers up there!
Damn what is this, some kinda frat initiation thing or something?!?!?
"Hey neat, let's smash the bones!"
SMASH SMASH SMASH SMASH
Oh fuck oh FUCK oh fuck oh fuck...PMS...makes ya fall to pieces...
(c)Late April 1990 - Bloody Afterbirth/Toxic Shock
