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Toxic Shock 022
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. | |
.:::::. .:::::::::. o _____... Future of Game Machines |
..::::::::.. ::::::::::::: /|-|' | |
.::: :::::: :::. :::: :::: / \ | Toxic File #22 |
:: :::: :: ::::. : Dear, say | by Gross Genitalia |
: :: : :::::::. hello to |___________________________|
:: :::::::. Fetus and his friend Mr. Gun!
:::: : :::::
:::: oxic :::......::::: hock - Centre of Eternity 615.552.5747
.::::::. :::::::::::: HQ for The Esoteric Society
:::::::::::: :::::::::: and Toxic Shock
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Game machines. Made popular by that crummy piece of shit Atari. The 2600.
The 5200. The 7800. The 2600 again, this time in a smaller cheaper plastic
case and now selling for around 40 bucks. Nintendo. First making their stand
in the form of arcade machines in the first half of the eighties. Now the
most popular home game machine around. Sega comes along. A Nintendo-style
reject striving to be popular and releasing a 16-bit-based Sega Machine.
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The year 2015. Nintendo can't stand Sega's release of a 32-bit megamachine.
Nintendo releases its 64-bit Home Game System From Hell Supersystem. Yeah,
that should hold them for awhile.
Little Billy wanted the new system soooo bad. His parents finally bought it
for him for Christmas. They were soooo happy to see Little Billy play on his
system. He really enjoyed it.
Bullshit. Little Billy wasn't as Little as his parents thought him to be.
He lied. He plotted. He was so cunning that his parents thought him out to be
a perfect little angel. Ha! Billy was smart. Billy applied himself. In the
recent days the fall of Ma Bell brought about a widespread heaven among
hackers. Everyone was hacking. Everyone was getting busted too. What Nintendo
of America did not know was that they had left a little loophole in their new
64-bit system that Little Billy was about to work through.
Billy was playing around inside his new system, as all good little nosy
electronics freaks do. "Billy what the HELL are you doing?" "Uh nothing
Dad, I just thought I spilt a little Super-Caffeinated Jolt Cola in my
Nintendo SuperSystem that's all!" "Okay." Billy found that the game ports
were hooked to a decoder chip. And from this game port Billy could pull more
functions that up, down, left, right, fire, select, turbo fire. In fact he
had up the twenty separate connections he could make, and feed to the decoder.
That cheap-ass 8-bit Nintendo still left around from the twentieth century
had been ripped apart by Billy, who for five dollars got his hand on a
broken one. He fixed up up and got it working. Ha! It was so easy. He could
program his own GAMES for them! Billy saw the same kind of logic in his new
64-bit system. Programming.
He went down to the garage and burned in a few IC's and soldered them to a
piece of perfboard. He shoved it into his new system. Boom. It WORKED!
It was a simple loop to process values from the controller decoder and
display the values they returned. He built a simple controller with twenty
buttons and coded them into a seven-conductor wire. Hooked them in. Each
button returned a separate value. He then reversed the process.
In place of the controller he hooked up a series of twenty LED's on a
breadboard. He burned in another IC, a simple program which would return
the process and send values FROM the IC TO the controller decoder.
Voila, the damned thing was also an ENcoder. It coded the values and
pumped them out the the breadboard. A set of LED's would flash, some not
at all, when the IC send out values. Billy decided to analyze the
encoder/decoder chip. He burned in an IC that replicated the decoder
portion of the chip. He hooked it into the breadboard and wired the LED's
appropriately.
Ah ha, as the IC sent out its separate values, the encoder/decoder routine
flashed each LED successively. No grouping. No blanks. Everything worked.
Billy the Kid became Billy the Hacker in Hacker Heaven.
Billy's little 64-bit machine WAS quite compact. Technology had provided it
to be even smaller than that oh so ANCIENT Sega 16-bit. Billy decided to
try his hand at Nintendo hacking. He popped open his Zelda VI: Ganon Returns
Again cartridge and studied the circuitry which allowed game storage and
its power source of a lithium battery. Logical, he thought.
His master plan. He would devise a code hacker to be stored on a cartridge
with the necessary IC's, capacitors, etc, to run the "program". He would
store the codes in a bank of RAM chips, to be powered by a lithium backup
battery so the codes would be retained when he removed the cartridge.
He wrote his program on his Amiga 4500HD 64-bit 68050 computer. The 68885
math coprocessor within helped speed his program. Damn good code hacker,
but he couldn't very well cart his Amiga around with him.
He translated his Amiga code hacker to raw electronic form. Not-gates.
And-gates. Transistors. The works. He devise schematics for IC's to do the
work. Months of long hard work. His plan was ready.
He popped down to the garage to the Sirius Cybernetics IC Synthesizer and
punched in his schematic. He dropped a few micro-transistors and resistors
and such into the hopper and the machine went to work. A crude machine,
Billy planned to build a perfected model when he grew older. The completed
chips dropped into the tray. Billy soldered sockets onto a piece of copper
clad board he had already etched. He put the chips in their respective
sockets and soldered on a few other necessary components. He made sure the
right connections were hooked to the right pins on the edgeboard connector.
He took a spare game controller cable and wired the correct leads to the
four conductors of a standard phone cable. He was a genius; his plan
was ready.
He tried out his project for the first time on his own system. Perfect.
The menu screen came up and he selected a few non-volatile options. Ones
that would not hack actual code through actual ports but dial a few
local board to see if it would detect carrier at various baud rates.
Perfect. He chose to use 300 baud as the detect rate since that seemed more
logical to him. Everything would detect 300 baud, perfect in his mind.
After blowtorching the entire "program", Billy was ready to hack his ass off.
He took the thing to school with him. "Oh gee mom, I have basketball
practice today!" "Okay dear." Ha! Likely excuse. Billy snuck down the
hallway to the teacher's lounge. He popped out a few ceiling tiles and found
the phone cable leading to the office. He yanked out the wires connecting
line four and hooked alligator clips from he cord on his Nintendo to the
phone line. This deadened the line four on the actual phone but what the hell,
what teacher was going to use line FOUR? Oh well. He spliced a cable out of
the nearest electrical line in the ceiling and ran it over to power his
Nintendo. With controller one he selected his hacking options. Multi-port.
Programmed the different ports. Multi-carrier. He programmed twenty
long distance computers from various areas of the country. Done. He unplugged
the controller and replaced the ceiling tile. He picked up on line four.
Dead. He went to another teacher's lounge. Line four. Dead. No big shit.
Next day. "Mom, got track meet." "Okay." He went back and plugged in the
controller and broke out of hack mode. He went to list mode. Four valid
codes came up on the screen. He called various bullshit around the country
(time and temperature, weather) to see if the Gestapo came after the school.
A simple measure to see if any of them were puposely bad accounts. None
seemed to be. Hacker heaven.
Billy has not been caught yet. From 2015 until now he has used the Nintendo
method. Until another Ma Bell Gestapo comes along to monopolize the
telecommunications world, Billy will continue to hack codes. And use them.
And feel good about his achievements.
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But seriously. As we sit here at the end of the eighth decade of the twentieth
century, A.D., we see an 8-bit Nintendo. An 8- and 16-bit Sega. And still we
see the .000000000004-bit Atari 2600. Will game machines advance this far in
the future, by the Time of Little Billy in 2015? Or will they die out as fad,
and hit home towards the personal computer market?
(c)1989 Toxic Shock
The Follwers of Fetus the Destroyer
Bloody Afterbirth Gross Genitalia
Fetal Juice Twisted Testicles
Tasty Abortion Maybe an unnamed member.
