Copy Link
Add to Bookmark
Report
The Toxic Custard Workshop Episoder 186 to 190
****************************************************************************
### # # ### ##### ## # # # ## ## # # ### ##### ## ### ###
# # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #
# #### ### # # # # # # # # # ## # #### ### # #
# # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #
# # # ### # ## # # # ## ## ## ### # # # # # ###
____________________________________________________________________________
# # ### #### # # #### # # ### #### ##### # # ##### ####
# # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #
# # # # # #### ### ### ##### # # #### ##### # # ##### ###
# # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # #
### ### # # # # #### # # ### # # # ##### ##### ####
*****NUMBERS 186 TO 190***********BY DANIEL BOWEN (tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu)*****
"Essentially Toxic Custard"
toxic custard workshop files 186 - 14th february 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard worksh ### ######### ######### 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard worksh ### ### ### ### 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard worksh ### ######### ######### 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard worksh ### ### ### ### ### 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard worksh ### ######### ######### 1994 - by daniel bowen
toxic custard workshop files 186 - 14th february 1994 - by daniel bowen
TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA - VOLUME 19
SAMURAI
Historically, a Japanese military retainer. Now the attracter of an
abnormal amount of attention from young teenage boys, action film
producers, and others stuck in their puberty.
SAND
Small grains of rock, which turn up everywhere for weeks after
you've been to the beach.
SCHEMA
What you call a diagram when it gets too complicated and impressive
to be called a diagram.
SEA
Where fish fingers come from.
SEATTLE
City in the north-western United States, in the state of
Washington. This should not be confused with Washington DC, which
is a city in the north-east. People who've failed geography, claim
that 93% of places in the United States are named after George
Washington.
Rock music experts predict that by 2020, all musicians will be
from Seattle.
SEMESTER
A university half-year, especially designed so that the first ten
or so weeks are piss-easy, followed by about four weeks of
assignment/revision/exam absolute misery.
SHAMPOO
Although shampoo is designed to clean hair, its name gives away its
true make-up: artificial shit. For centuries the aristocracy
continually got very annoyed, and beheaded the shit-sodden peasants
for having less dandruff than they did. Then about two hundred
years ago they realised that mixing shit into your hair was
actually one of the best ways to get rid of dandruff. Of course,
the cosmetics companies couldn't market real shit as a hair
cleaner, so chemists came up with an artificial version.
SHOTGUN
Inspector Unnecessary-Violence's preferred method of persuasion.
SIREN
Originally a sea-nymph whose songs lured sailors to their death, a
siren is now a loud wailing noise that goes off all the time and
that everyone ignores because they hope its only a test.
SCEPTIC TANK
A new type of plumbing device. Once you flush, it looks at the
situation and says "gee, I dunno guv, I'm not sure I can get that
big turd down the S bend. Just that little too big, know what I
mean? Looks very dodgy to me."
SPECIAL GUESTS
What used to be known as a support act. When listening to support
acts at concerts, look out for the drunken teenager nearby who has
decided that he doesn't like them, and is demanding almost
incomprehensibly that they "geeeeett offffff!" This demand will
even continue between bands, when the PA is playing music off one
of the roadies' CDs. When the main act actually comes on, he will
follow this up with "oooiiyaaaaaeeaahh!" type screaming (now
identified as being a regression to ancient caveman hunting calls),
shouting himself hoarse in the vain hope that the star hears him
and will be moved to personally come up to his seat and say hello.
And of course clapping along with the songs, half a second out of
sync, while gently swaying in the breeze of the indoor auditorium.
Yes, all these things and more happened at the Lenny Kravitz
concert the other night. Lenny Kravitz rolled into town with 14
trucks - 4 for the equipment, 10 for his ego. After some great
music, Lenny declared that there "is only one God!" Problem is, he
thinks it's him.
STEERING COMMITTEE
Picture a huge semi-trailer, hurtling uncontrolled down the road...
and inside the vast cab, is the steering committee, trying to pass
a motion to swerve to avoid a little old lady.
"I would like to put forward a motion to steer 10 degrees left,
to dodge the little old lady."
"Any seconders? Objections...?"
"Well, I'm uncertain at this point as to the potential
viability of such a move. It would almost certainly involve
indicator loadings, excess steering wheel turning, and the need
for specialist mirror engineers to check the traffic in the
next lane. I would propose cost-benefit analysis..."
*SQUISH*
"... ah well, I think the point may now be academic. But let's
formulate a review study of the situation, in order that..."
STATIONERY
Objects such as pens, pencils, stapler and sticky-tape. These have
been studied over the last few years, and it has now been confirmed
that they are able to move around a house or office on their own.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Somewhere in the dark recesses of your
mind you're screaming. It is a scream
of terror. Of horror. And of question.
"Where the fuck can I ftp the Toxic
Custard back-issues from!?" And from
the distant light comes the booming
reply. "Email tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu
for details..."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen
--
Daniel Bowen, NTC Systems------| I, and I alone, am responsible
Telecom Australia, Melbourne---| for the above drivel which I dare
dbowen@vcomtelc.telecom.com.au-| to let come forth from my fingers
TCWF stuff: tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu| onto the unsuspecting net.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Total Toxic Custard"
---T-O-X-I-C---------------> No. 187
------C-U-S-T-A-R-D-----------------> 21/2/94
---------W-O-R-K-S-H-O-P----------> written by
----F-I-L-E-S--------------------------> Daniel Bowen
TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA - VOLUME 20
TAMPON COMMERCIAL
A unique form of advertising, that shows just about everything
except for the actual product. Typically seen are young women
bouncing around beaches, on horses and running around gardens
smiling a lot, enjoying their weekends. 98% of tampon commercial
slogans contain the word "free", or a derivative. Which, if they're
not careful, will result in hundreds of women flocking around
tampon factories demanding they hand them over for free.
TAPE, MAGNETIC
A form of storage, tape was especially developed to make it easy to
record and re-record valuable images, sounds or data, onto it. The
tape can then be played back at will, before suddenly getting
caught in the heads of your tape deck one day and consequently
losing all the valuable images, sounds and/or data. That's if a
friendly neighbourhood magnet doesn't get at it first. The key to
keeping your recordings safe is to invest in quality tapes, store
them sensibly (ie in the most inconvenient way), and buy lots of
head cleaners, demagnetisers, and whatever else the record shops
can talk you into buying.
TARTAN
Checked pattern that is far too loud, but permitted to be so
because it's Scottish tradition.
TASMANIA
That bit of Australia that always gets forgotten.
TELEMARKETING
The practice of ringing you up when you're on the toilet just to
ask you what you think about council mergers, would you like to
donate to charity X, or would you like to get Call Waiting put on
your phone.
TELEVISION
Just a small box that sits in the corner of the room, but still
manages to dominate your life.
TEST
Computer term. The name of every file that you can't think of a
proper name for.
TIE
Useless piece of clothing, usually worn by men. For this reason the
tie is often seen as a phallic symbol, but in fact it was devised
as a substitute to prevent men being irritated by not being able to
rub their own chest hair. The tie is therefore seen as the symbol
of sophisticated man, an evolving species, with no time for the
troglodytes of yesterday. "Ug, me no fondle chest hair. Me fondle
tie instead. Tie good. Me fiddle with knot."
THESIS
A work of great knowledge and thorough research on a very obscure
subject, which upon publication is put in a library somewhere and
never read again by anyone of great importance, except other thesis
writers.
THIEF
i. Profession somehow made semi-glamorous in fantasy games, by
making out that they are a noble breed of honourable men and women,
who have their own organised societies and guilds, rather than
weedy scumbags who break into your house and nick your video.
ii. The character that no-one wants when they first play
Dungeons & Dragons, because they can't kill monsters or cast cool
spells.
TOTAL
The sum or entire amount of a number of things, which if added by
hand tends not to relate in any way shape or form to the values or
attributes of those things. Oh bugger, where's the calculator got
to?
TOXIC CUSTARD WORKSHOP FILES
Fictional alleged humour written during the early-1990s by some
deranged git in Australia. Now known to cause permanent brain
damage if consumed for long periods of time.
TRAFFIC
A mass of sometimes moving, sometimes stationary metal blobs on
rubber wheels, which doesn't seem to diminish even on declared
smog-alert days.
TRAM
Large green thing which rumbles down city streets, carrying people
to where they want to go. Generally follows a predetermined path,
but in no way subscribes to outlandish concepts such as
"timetables". It is generally recognised that trams, like
computers, shops, and a multitude of other services, would run much
smoother if no-one actually used them.(*)
(*) Trams would also run smoother if dickheads in cars could
remember what the yellow lines meant, and how to avoid driving in
lanes that feature this popular decoration.
Computers would run smoother if not only were they not
subjected to users, but could also reject programs and data, and
just sit around all day humming.
Shops would run smoother if they held no stock, never sold
anything, and were filled in with solid concrete to prevent
looters.
TREE
Large plant form, most commonly favoured by dogs, children
afflicted with climbing fixations, hungry cats, and logging
companies.
TRIANGLE
Three-sided object which, even in isosceles form, begins to get very
boring after only a short time. For maximum excitement, an object
with many more sides should be considered.
TRUMPET
Musical instrument which is much harder to play than it looks.
TUSSOCK
Word only used in novels about farms in out of the way places.
TUTOR
One who teaches at a university. On the evolutionary scale, a tutor
is barely above a lecturer, although usually several fashion points
ahead. University tutors are widely believed to have very easy
conditions, with only a few hours a week of tutoring, long holidays
at the end of the year, corduroy loading, and long-necked skivvies
provided free.
TYPEWRITER
Writing implement now on the verge of obscurity.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Live and direct from a keyboard somewhere
in the southern hemisphere, you have been
watching Toxic Custard. For details of
back-issues available, email
tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen
--
Daniel Bowen, NTC Systems------|
Telecom Australia, Melbourne---| Telecom is not responsible for
dbowen@vcomtelc.telecom.com.au-| Daniel's words. Honestly.
TCWF stuff: tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu|
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"You all know Toxic Custard"
|||||||| |||||| || || ||||||| Welcome to the Toxic Custard
|| || || | || || Workshop Files. Number 188,
|| || ||||| |||||| 28th February 1994. Written by
|| |||||| | | || Daniel Bowen.
TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA - VOLUME 21
UFO
Unidentified Flying Object. Also known by the acronym
ACATMTTSAFMCAMMFFDOMLAIPIMSAMMP (Aliens Came And Took Me To Their
Spaceship And Fed Me Cornflakes And Made Me Forget Five Days Of My
Life And Inserted Probes Into My Skull And Made Me Pregnant.)
It is now almost certain that UFOs were specifically designed
to enable poor country-folk to rip off current affairs shows.
Actually, most UFOs are considerably smaller than flying saucers,
and are usually attributed to overhead seagulls.
ULTRA
Prefix invented by marketing people. Used when "very" just isn't
adequate. "Ultra" is actually quite old hat, most reputable
marketing people having moved on to "mega". But be careful, because
"mega" comes from the Greek, and they might want it back.
UMBRELLA
An object of amazing qualities. Umbrellas are even more adept at
detaching themselves from their owners than stationery. They also
send out subconscious thoughts to their owners. On days when it
will rain, they urge "leave me at home... it won't rain... it will
be dry..." And on days when it will be sunny and bright all day
they claim "well, it might rain. Sky looks a little cloudy... you
wouldn't want to get soaked, would you..." Many believe that
umbrellas are in league with the Weather Bureau, who for years have
contrived to cause weather harassment.
UP
Direction. To move up is to defy gravity for a short time, after
which a plunging downward motion will follow. (See Investment).
URCHIN
Descriptive of a mischievous child, especially a boy, who has not
destroyed any of your property. An urchin who *has* destroyed some
of your property is more properly known as a "little bastard that
I'm gonna lynch if I get my hands on him..."
URINE
What, you want this prestigious journal to sink to the level of the
gutter (or even the sewer), by resorting to getting a few cheap
laughs by talking about matters pertaining to piss? By discussing
discharge? By explaining excreta? Not a hope. But I will launch
into a brief tirade of naughty words: BUM BUM BUM FARTY ANUS
FORESKIN BUTTOCK!!
USHER
Formerly a person who would escort the audiences to their seats,
cinema ushers are now relegated to clearing out the snogging
teenagers in the back-row who haven't realised the film has ended.
If you ever feel intimidated by over-zealous ushers, just look them
in the eye and try to estimate how much more money you earn.(*)
(*) If you don't, then accusing them of fascist leanings may be
the correct course of action. Or not.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
So, the Australian Winter Olympic team... from the land down under...
from the wide brown flat land of searing sun and steaming kangaroo
shit... have finally managed to get a medal. That's right, Australia
has got a Winter Olympics medal for the first time ever. Bronze. And
while the rest of the country bathes in the euphoria, what I want to
know is, why did it take so bloody long?!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
There is an old proverb which says "He who inserts his naughty
bits into cabbages is indeed a pervert of the first degree". These,
and many other such wise words were first writ by an ancestor of
mine, Sir Gerard Flopsquoggling deBowen.
Sir Gerard was a philosopher, sage, and mad axeman for the
Marquis deBastard, during the late 1600s. Many of Sir Gerard's words
are now famous, and have been maintained by the family for centuries
on post-it notes stuck on the fridge. Such pearls of wisdom as:
"He who hesitates, loses his map, and wanders into the deepest
part of Thieves' Forest at the dead of night with a bag full
of gold and no dagger of his own, is not only lost, but
probably dead."
"A stitch in time will heal if it is bandaged correctly and if
one can keep away the mad woman with the leeches."
"One can hide behind a tree, one can hide in a hole, but one who
hides in a plague pit cannot and will not be found again."
and "A man with his head cut off is no longer a man that is a good
credit risk."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Oh devotees of the Mighty Oracle. Let us kneel and praise Him.
Oh Mighty Oracle... whose indexes are always self-sustaining, and
whose queries need no optimising from thy humble servants... whose
database is forever fully normalised... whose performance hast always
outweighed that of the false gods... and whose DBA options art truly
mind-boggling... please answer this, a miserable query from your
unworthy servants: Select IResCode from Results, Calls where
Results.ICallNo = Calls.ICallNo
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I know what you're thinking. You're
thinking "I wish Toxic Custard wasn't
over for another week." Well tough. It
is. But don't despair; there's another
187 editions of this shit just waiting
to be read by every idiot who decides
their life has been leading up to this.
Where are these back-issues available?
Just email for details!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen
--
Daniel Bowen, Atlas Development--| My words are purely my own.
NTC, Telecom Australia, Melbourne| Not anyone else's. I, and only
dbowen@vcomtelc.telecom.com.au---| I, am responsible for them.
TCWF stuff: tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu--| Honest.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Victory For Toxic Custard"
---======--=====-==------==-======-===--======---======----march-7th-
-----==---==-----==------==-==------==-==----==-==----==-------------
-----==---==-----==--==--==-======--==--======---=======--written by-
-----==---==------========--==------==-==----==-------==------daniel-
-----==----=====---==--==---==------==--======--=======--------bowen-
TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA - VOLUME 22
VACANT
Empty. Often descriptive of a house, flat, piece of land, mind,
etc. The vacancy of houses, flats and land is usually advertised on
big signs outside, and in newspapers. The vacancy of minds is
advertised by a lack of understanding of even basic things such as
gravity, a suitably vague sounding voice, and an annoying habit of
"oh yeah, I agree with you totally right.. but..."
VACUUM-CLEANER
Men have traditionally said of vacuum-cleaners "what's that?" New
men know what vacuum-cleaners are, even if they've never touched
them in the flesh.
The vacuum-cleaner is essentially a device designed to scare
the shit out of the cat, give an impression that the carpet is
clean, and fill its own bag just as you're about to vacuum a really
dirty room because you are expecting guests to arrive five minutes
ago.
VAGRANT
One of those people who make you feel guilty (for not giving them
money) and angry (for them bothering you in the first place) at the
same time. Actually most vagrants in this city either keep
themselves to themselves by being sleepy and smelly on street
benches, or by cheerfully walking their way through inner-city
streets with no shoes on, mumbling theories on modern civilisation.
VALENTINE'S DAY
The 14th of February. Every year on this day, any men who have
forgotten the significance of the day report to casualty wards with
their testicles in a small bag in their pocket.
VANDAL
Vandals are people who have their brain surgically removed and then
go around destroying, damaging and generally depreciating anything
they feel like, just because they want to. Psychiatrists have
described this behaviour as regression, and a primal act of
defiance against society. Society reply that this is a load of
bullshit, and that they, with their psychiatrists, should be lined
up against a graffiti covered wall and shot.
I worry about some of the people writing graffiti, actually.
Quite apart from the odd desire to have their meaningless
illiterate scribbles displayed for all the world to see, I can tell
that the number of cool nicknames left available for use is
obviously a problem. Opposite my local station, two people have
sprayed their names: "Q-Kumba" and "Salads". Now, I hesitate to
jump to conclusions, but I think that any society where today's
rebels have to resort to fruit and vegetables to get their
nicknames is a society that needs to eat more meat.
VANQUISH
A word most commonly used in solemn ceremonies, usually of the form
"Behold the devil, I now vanquish thee" in weird religious
ceremonies or bad fantasy books. The amusing thing being that the
speaker is generally of the mistaken belief that the use of a
little Olde English will result in the demise of Satan for all
eternity. "Oh no Earthlings, you have commanded me to be
vanquished, so I must! Argghhh! You held up white candles! I'm done
for!" It's far more likely to catch his notice, where-upon he
proclaims "You must be joking, let's be having yer then", and drags
the anguished soul down into hell.
VAPULATION
A flogging. Still used by judges to avoid public outcry when they
sentence prisoners to "three months jail and ten vapulations."
VARNISH
What you promise yourself you'll do to that unfinished furniture
you have bought. And still haven't done twenty years later when it
begins to fall apart.
VAULT
Like a basement, but more sinister.
VELOCITY
Like speed, but more scientific-sounding.
VENN DIAGRAM
Diagram of circles and lines which gives you your only chance to
use that plastic template for drawing anything other than random
arcs and odd-looking futuristic cities.
VENTRILOQUIST
Someone whose antics you get sick of after just a few minutes, and
want to throw a bucket of water over just to see their dummy make
blubbering noises.
VETO
Device by which one absolute bastard can spoil the work of everyone
else.
VILLAGE
Word now almost exclusively used in tourist brochures just after
the adjectives "enchanting" and "traditional". And possibly
"quaint". Generally descriptive of a small settlement with more
churches than shops, which gets boring rapidly, despite being
picturesque.
VIRTUAL REALITY
Another one of those concepts that no-one over 45 really
understands. See also: Information superhighway, Interactive TV.
[Actually, come to think of it, *I* don't really understand all of
these.]
VOLUNTARY
Descriptive of an action which you are doing purely because you
have been embarrassed into it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
If it keeps on raining, Custard's gonna
break. What am I on about? TCWF back-
issues, of course! Couldn't you guess?
No? Oh well. Back-issues are still
available. Email tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu
for details.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen
--
Daniel Bowen, Atlas Development--| From time to time random dribblings
NTC, Telecom Australia, Melbourne| come out of my mind. Telecom
dbowen@vcomtelc.telecom.com.au---| Australia is not responsible for
TCWF stuff: tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu--| them. Neither is anyone else.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Why Why Why Toxic Custard"
..... ... . . ..... . .... ....
. . . C u s.t.a r d. . F i.l.e s .
T.o.x i c . . ... . ..... . .
. . . . .W o.r k s.h o p . . . 1 4 M a r c h 1 9 9 4
. ... . . . . .... .... b y D a n i e l B o w e n
TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA - VOLUME 23
WADE
A modified version of swimming for when you either just don't feel
like actual swimming, have a paranoid fear of sharks or man-eating
tuna, or have happened to arrive at the beach with a severe lack of
bathing apparatus.
WALL
Structure of astounding simplicity. In terms of building and
design, you can't get much simpler than a wall. Actually, no, I'm
wrong, a floor is simpler to build. Because you don't have to worry
about it falling over. Because it already has. Floors generally
have very little job satisfaction, because it entails letting
people walk all over them.
WALLET
Small container for carrying vital items such as credit cards,
money, etc. Wallets traditionally vanish from your person at the
most inconvenient time, resulting in you making a futile tour of
your pockets looking for it, despite knowing full well you've left
it at home.
Wallets are also the traditional home for at least several
dozen automatic teller slips, business cards from people you can't
remember meeting, receipts of all shapes and sizes, and various
other papers hidden in the more out-of-the-way pockets. Regular
cleaning (say, every six months) will result in great pleasure as
your wallet suddenly loses three-quarters of its weight and
thickness, and it becomes possible again to carry it in your back
pocket and walk at the same time.
WALTZ
The second rhythm button from the left. Doo ch ch Doo ch ch...
WAR
I think Frankie Goes To Hollywood had it right. Put the leaders -
the actual people who've insulted each others' grandmothers or
whatever - in the ring, and let them beat the shit out of each
other. And after the claims and counter-claims of steroids have
been dismissed, we'd have a winner.
Of course, us voters would soon realise what was going to
happen if they didn't have strong leaders. John Major would be out.
Japan's PM would be replaced with a Sumo wrestler. Bill Clinton
might stand a chance if he keeps working out - but no more
McDonalds. China would find someone who *isn't* due for a pension.
And as for Australia, Keating might be good at calling people
scumbags and recalcitrants, but I reckon we might get Bronwyn
Bishop before too long. Yeah... stick the knee in, Bronwyn!
WASH
An activity that, if men had their way, would only be done once or
twice a month. Down beneath it all, most men would much rather
cover themselves in mud and walk around in skins. Which explains
the popularity of football.
WEATHER
Environmental conditions which necessitate the wearing of whatever
article/s of clothing you just happen not to have brought with you.
This is because weather has an average unpredictability factor of
97%.
WHARF
One of those places where noisy men hang around chewing tobacco and
swearing and going on strike a lot.
WINTER
That time of year that everyone hates despite initially welcoming
it after a long summer. Except for people who live so close to the
equator that they don't notice the difference. Lucky bastards.
WISH
Futile optimistic desire for something.
WORSHIP
A be very humble to someone else, in the vain hope that they will
grant you a wish. Worship may involve icons, idols, sacrifices,
large cheques sent to the Bahamas, prayer, and drinking Kool-aid.
One of the more unusual practices of worship took place amongst
the Pangoylegoatsoup Sect of the early 1920s. These were a bunch of
people so frightened of the imminent rise of the Anti-Christ,
Byllierae Sirus, that they ritually set fire to their own hair, and
chased shaven goats through the streets. Some dismissed them as
loonies, but who's laughing now, eh?!?
WORRY
Some things do worry me - like the balding bearded guy on the train
this morning reading "The Problem of Population". He looked like in
between stamp collecting he was seriously considering genocide.
WRONG
Incorrect, erroneous. Generally, the things that are most likely to
be wrong are those which you feel the most confident about. This
confidence has usually led you to proclaim it is an undeniable fact
to all and sundry, and to generally stake your reputation/life/
fortune on it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ./ /
Back in the early nineties, when ./ __/_
almost no-one had a mobile phone, / / / / Find us in
and the Internet was just half / /_/_/ the Internet
its current size, TCWF back- / /| | Yellow Pages.
issues were seldom seen. But no / / | |
longer. For details on how to get /_/ |_| (No, I don't think
them, send mail right now, right it's worth that much
here - tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu either. And why does
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TCWF get two
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen consecutive entries?!)
--
Daniel Bowen, Atlas Development--| The difference between me and
NTC, Telecom Australia, Melbourne| Telecom Australia is that I'm an
dbowen@vcomtelc.telecom.com.au---| individual with my own twisted
TCWF stuff: tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu--| opinions, and that Telecom is a
phone company, whose responsibilities
do not include my opinions.
PS. The spelling checker wanted to change "Keating" to "Cheating".
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
the Toxic Custard Workshop Files by Daniel Bowen, Melbourne, Australia
Copyright (c) 1994 Daniel Bowen. May be freely distributed
without profit provided this notice remains intact.
For subscription information, contact tcwf@gnu.ai.mit.edu
