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The Neo-Comintern 136
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t h e n e o - c o m i n t e r n e l e c t r o n i c m a g z i n e
I n s t a l l m e n t N u m b e r 1 3 6
We Are the New International
January 7th, 2001
Editor: BMC
Writers:
Gnarly Wayne
BMC
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;P Featured in this installment .b
$ $
$ Dream Sequence One - Gnarly Wayne $
$ Dream Sequence Two - Gnarly Wayne $
$ The Third Concept - BMC $
$ Dream Sequence Four - Gnarly Wayne $
`q p'
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EDITOR'S NOTE
Dude, I'm an insomniac. I just woke up from this dream where I was
blind - well, not blind, but my eyes were really sensitive to light. First
I was in this weird canopy bed in the desert and I was trying to watch TV,
but the sun beams are shining through the white mesh curtains on the bed and
goddamnit I'm blind! I'm blind! I can't tell what's on the television at
all and now I have to go to the stripmall in this foreign city to find the
movie theatre. Nope, there's no way I can do it, but somehow I make it there
anyway. Nope, it's not the movie theatre afterall, it's actually a boiler
room and Old Scratch is there and I'm scared as heck. Anyway, now I can see
again, but there is some really weird and scary stuff around me and I have
fallen into a state where nothing has solid form, so it is more like intense
emotions, especially fear, swirling all around me. Oh wait, I'm not in a
boiler room and I wasn't blind - it was all just a story that somebody was
reading to me in my dream. Wow, what a realistic story that was. I just
hope that if you are dreaming right now that my retelling of this story is
not as intense as it was for me... cause that would be bad.
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;P DREAM SEQUENCE ONE .b
`q by Gnarly Wayne p'
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I am working on a model train set with a close friend. I am rubbing a
charcoal-like substance on the track. At the start of the track, I rub it in
circles. After that, I rub in a straight line. Makes the train go faster,
don't cha know? My friend tells me this as we do it, even though, for some
reason, I already know this.
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;P DREAM SEQUENCE TWO .b
`q by Gnarly Wayne p'
`nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn'
Blossom and Six are writing reports to impress their good-looking teacher.
He knows what they are up to and says both the reports fucking suck. After
they leave crying, he examines the reports closer. Blossom has a joke in her
report that goes like this:
"What is the position where both people are on top?"
Answer: "Sex."
I laughed myself awake.
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;P THE THIRD CONCEPT .b
`q by BMC p'
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I have spent the last three hours meditating in preparation for this attempt
to pen the third and, as of yet, the most profound of my classic concepts.
The following thoughts have been brewing in my mind for many years, and
tonight I am going to allow all of you to drink of them. But be wary of
intoxication, for too much of this elixir will open your eyes and corrupt
your soul. I say this from experience. You have been warned, so read on at
your own risk and know that I do not encourage you to look upon these words
if you have any concern for your own mental and spiritual well-being.
Although you may gain infinite power, you will do so at the expense of your
sanity and dignity.
It is a well-known fact that readers of The Comintern enjoy a good debate
twenty per cent more often than readers of any other magazine. On the other
hand, not as many people enjoy a bad debate. A bad debate is one where one
party or both parties try to piss the other off instead of attempting to
mutually benefit each other. The purpose of this tome is to teach you how
to defeat someone if and only if you would rather WIN an arguement than
ACHIEVE something positive from it. note: These instructions are not to be
followed by anybody who is even mildly intelligent.
As a youth I often refused to acknowledge that which could not be proven.
The great thing about this is that nothing can really be proven. If someone
tells you that the Earth is round you can say, "Oh really? Show me that."
Of course they won't be able to.
If atoms exist, I've never seen them... that's not enough proof.
The only problem with this line of thinking is that it may not be very
pragmatic. For example, I am afraid that we may have to believe certain
things in order to continue to exist. For example, if I didn't believe I
was hungry and didn't think I had to eat I would probably starve and die.
There is nothing that can prove this to me, but I am satisfied to live my
life as though it was true. To simplify this, I'm just going to say that my
belief in this overwhelms my disbelief of it... but that still doesn't mean
that I'm going to accept whatever some nobody tells me.
Maybe it's not that I don't believe anything, just that I don't believe
anything YOU say...
Here is the surefire way to prove someone wrong every time. If someone says
something you disagree with but are unable to disprove, ask if they are
certain that their sense of perception is working properly. If they say no,
tell them to shut the hell up then. If they say yes, then ask, "Well can
people walk through walls?" When they say yes, prove them wrong by NOT
walking through a wall. That will put them in their place!
If their sense of perception is actually not working properly, they might
think you walked through the wall even though you didn't. Remember, they
could also say the thing that is not and make you their fool, so be careful
of that.
If you succeed and beat them with this technique, they will be stunned and
under the laws of the Magna Carta you can legally do whatever you wish with
them. Enjoy the sodomy! Oh wait, that's whatever I want to do. You can do
something else if you like.
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;P DREAM SEQUENCE FOUR .b
`q by Gnarly Wayne p'
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I am sitting in a fast food restaurant, watching a girl I like with her
husband/boyfriend/whatever. We've been friends for awhile. I sit alone in
the corner. She comes over, draps her leg over mine, and holds my hand.
She mentions something about how another person who works here is listening,
but three years in the past. She begins to explain why we can't be together.
I notice that next to me, a sign is being torn down. Behind it is another
sign. It has a bottle on it and the number 195 in each corner. I stare at
it for a long time, trying to figure it out. It doesn't have a $ or a
decimal in it, so I figured it wasn't a price. What could 195 and a bottle
mean? I looked back over at the girl, but she was already gone. The sign
had destroyed my last chance at happiness but I still respected it.
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and then you may wonder... could it all have been a dream?
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Copyright 2001 by The Neo-Comintern #136-01/07/01
All content is property of The Neo-Comintern.
You may redistribute this document, although no fee can be charged and the
content must not be altered or modified in any way. Unauthorized use of any
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