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The Neo-Comintern 067
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t h e n e o - c o m i n t e r n e l e c t r o n i c m a g z i n e
I n s t a l l m e n t N u m b e r 6 7
.WE ARE THE 5th INTERNATIONAL
.June 15th, 1999
.Editor: BMC
.Writers:
.Gnarly Wayne
.Komrade B
.BMC
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";P'
Featured in this installment: `$
$
Predictions For A New Millennium- Komrade B $
The Struggle For Equality- BMC ;P
Umar And Alfonzo Go Fishing- Gnarly Wayne d'
;P
d'.
.,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,;
EDITOR'S NOTE
hi.
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";P'
PREDICTIONS FOR A NEW MILLENNIUM d'
by Komrade B ;P
d'.
.,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,;
Well as we prepare for the millenium. I would like to talk about
some things that were suppose to happen and may still.....
As I was watching Stanley Kubrick's masterpiece 2001 Space Odyssey,
some things were brought to my attention. Apparently we should be ripping
all over the space around our planet. Sometime within the next year and a
half we should find a big obelisk buried on the moon and then we can touch
it. I am proud to say that I found one in my backyard. I hacked it into
small blocks and made a walkway out of the bricks.
So when we find this block I can't wait until they make that talking
HAL computer and then go to Jupiter. While they are there, those of us on
Earth should be enjoying some of those luxuries promised on television.
First off when we are not flying around in our flying saucer cars we
will have moving sidewalks that whisk us away to our destinations. Our
pet cats and dogs will go to school and be as smart as us, and join us as
we go on our crazy travels through time.
I heard somewhere that spaghetti was going to be replaced by oral
sex, and we would all wear multi-colored cloaks and spandex. I personally
hope they don't get rid of spahgetti........
I also heard that we will have lots of cyborgs in the near future. I
also heard from a reliable resource (Animal) that precisely one third of
Asians are already cyborgs. I don't believe that, but I heard when they do
make cyborgs they will have a shortened life span and will not be allowed on
the Earth. If they come to Earth we have to hunt them down and kill them.
I also heard that the roles may be reversed and it will be us humans who
are hunted by cyborgs who are after our organs.
Another possibility is that the worlds governments will be overthrown
in favour of a single all-powerful government. All those who resist this new
power will be sent to Monster Labour Camps. I don't know where this idea came
from but it definitely has merit.
There may be war but I doubt it. I think a more viable option will
be that aliens will be sick of us sending radio signals into space and they
will come and wipe us out. I kind of look forward to that, because when you
read this and it happens I can laugh and say "Told you so!" and then I will
be vaporized by an alien photon.
In other areas I predict that snoop and drizzay will get back
together and dominate the first quarter of the new century with platinum
album after platinum album. I believe aliens will demand that we kill Eminem
and destroy all traces of his music so that we and the space creatures need
not endure it anymore.
I predict two marriages in the Neo-Comintern in the next millenium.
Cog to Cats, and me to BMC. Both will be beautiful.
Peterson will have successfully captured nearly 40% of the worlds
copper and begin purchasing small countries.
A never before seen Mang-slaughter will circulate to underground
college groups of the writers of The Comintern engaging in homosexual
activities.
2-Pac will resurrect as a zombie and usurp the leadership of Mr.Iggy
as Overblord of the zombie nation.
I'm sure there are many more. If you have any to add to the list or
would just like to dispute the ones listed, feel free to e-mail me. I would
love comments on my work.
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";P'
THE STRUGGLE FOR EQUALITY d'
by BMC ;P
d'.
.,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,;
In order to prove that my communist forces which will be overthrowing
in a few days aren't completely evil, I will tell you a little bit about our
hopes for equality in the new regime. In the current system the wage of the
proletariat varies from minimum wage to amounts which soar at over TEN
DOLLARS per hour! Well in the new system private ownership will be
abolished, everybody will earn the same amount of money, and we'll finally
see a system of true equality.
I went out and did some research, and the first thing that I noticed
was that people weren't physically equal. Sure there are lots of people that
look, talk and dress exactly the same, but those are mostly high school
students who are expressing their individuality. What we're going to have to
see more of in the future is cloning and genetic engineering. Yep, I'm
talking about old fashoined eugenics, just like the gool old nazis used to
do. That will be nice and evil, erh, I mean non-evil. heh heh
Then we'll make sure that everybody gets the same wage. We'll start
with oh say ZERO dollars per hour. Yep, that will work. Then we'll begin to
abide by Marx's "To each according to his needs, from each according to his
abilities." First we'll put solar panels and computer brains into everyone's
heads (except for mine because I will be the mastermind behind it all). It
might not seem to be all that benevolent of a plan to you right now, but
trust me, it will all work out.
ps these are the words of Lenin coming from the breath of BMC
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";P'
UMAR AND ALFONZO GO FISHING d'
by Gnarly Wayne ;P
d'.
.,;::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::;,"*,;
Umar and I started the day early so we could get a good fishing spot.
We drove Umar's horse to the fishing pond. Upon arrival, Umar said to me
"Hey, the weathers really good." I said "Yep." So we took a canoe, stole it
really, and went out onto the pond. I took my fishing pole and put a worm on
it. Umar did the same. Just then!!!! a fish swam by and we looked at it.
"Wow." I said.
We tossed our big rods into the water and waiting to get a bite.
Umar made idle conversation about iron and bindings while I listened. "Umar
is so interesting," I thought.
"Yes, I am", he said. Just then, a little tug came on my line.
"It's the BIG ONE!", I bellowed. I stood up in the boat and then the
boat tipped over.
THE END
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___________________________________________________
|THE COMINTERN IS AVAILIABLE ON THE FOLLOWING BBS'S |
|~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|
| BRING ON THE NIGHT (306) 373-4218 |
| CLUB PARADISE (306) 978-2542 |
| THE GATEWAY THROUGH TIME (306) 373-9778 |
|___________________________________________________|
| Website at: http://members.home.com/comintern |
| Email BMC at: thebmc@home.com |
|___________________________________________________|
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Copyright 1999 by The Neo-Comintern #67-06/15/99
All content is property of The Neo-Comintern.
You may redistribute this document, although no fee can be charged and the
content must not be altered or modified in any way. Unauthorized use of any
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