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The Neo-Comintern 036
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t h e n e o - c o m i n t e r n i n s t a l l m e n t 3 6
WE ARE THE 5th INTERNATIONAL
October 15th, 1998
editor: BMC
writers:
Cog
BMC
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.
featured in this installment: .
My Father, Prince Namor- BMC .
Lifestyles Of The Rich In Spirit II- Cog .
:
. . . . . . .. ...................................;
EDITOR'S KNOTE
Murder on campus? Well, I would have to place myself in the category
of those opposed. There are many reasons to be against this foul act, that
of murder on campus. It's wrong. It greatly hinders the education of those
killed. I know most students are young and eager to spill innocent blood,
but that is no excuse to succomb to your urge to walk around campus at night
until you find a victom's throat to cut. No reason to feel their lifeless
body fall limp in your arms as their tar-like blood runs on to your sleeve.
Sure it feels good to drag a decomposing body over to Clarence Avenue and
throw the corpse into a yellow marble bathtub sitting in someone's front
yard, but don't do it this fall (it's wrong).
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.
MY FATHER, PRINCE NAMOR .
by BMC .
(continued from "Atlantis, City Of Night") .
:
. . . . . . .. ...................................;
"BMC, I have waited many long years for your return to Atlantis. It
seems like an eternity has passed since the day I cradled you in my arms. Do
you remember when I brought you to the continent of North America and placed
you under the care of a man who you grew to know as "father"? The man's name
was W.O. Mitchell, and you were all of six months old. I can still feel the
pain of handing you over to a man who I knew would take extremely poor care
of you. Though I feel remorse for my deeds, I tried to provide you with the
best life possible. I knew a life at sea was not for you. Instead I taught
you the ideals of the republic so that the outside world would someday be
ready to live and trade harmoniously with us. I have always harboured love
for you, son, but I realize my ideals have been poorly incarnated."
And with that the lessons began. Two years of researching poetry,
philosophy and politics were in store for me.
"I have read `The Comintern' and I am displeased. When I am finished
schooling you in the Atlantean ways, you shall go forth and found the
`Neo-Comintern'."
Within that time there were several mysteries that were explained
about my childhood.
"Do you remember when you were a child on the Mary Celeste? All of
the people disappeared, but you were saved by a Sea Monstar. That was my
doing. Also, you may remember the time when your canoe capsized at camp. You
discovered that not only could you breathe under water, but you could also
catch trout with your mouth. Yep, that was mine too."
Yes, and exactly two years later my father, Prince Namor sent me from
Atlantis to seek and express new truths.
"I am very pleased with you, BMC. Tonight will be your last night in
fair Atlantis, the city of night. For your pleasure I have imported musical
talent which my researchers state to be the greatest singer of the overworld.
His name is Christopher Cross, and he will be singing many of his classics
along with some new material."
Wow. Christopher Cross.
And that is the story of how things happened.
Tha End!
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.
LIFESTYLES OF THE RICH IN SPIRIT II; ELECTRIC BOOGALOO .
By Cog .
:
. . . . . . .. ...................................;
"Here I sit, broken hearted. Got my pogey. Then I farted."
-Richard M. Nixon, 1998
I got my first unemployment cheque. I guess that getting paid to do
absolutely nothing other than sit around is a decent living. I just have to
make sure that I start sitting around in a timely fashion or else I'm fired.
And if you get fired from a job where you sit around and watch TV, then what
do you have left? The option of suicide, I suppose.
First, some background on the whole deal. I'm supposed to look for a
job all day every weekday. I think I must be the only person who has ever
done that because I have actually run out of places to apply at. Still, I
have no job. Well, I write for the Comintern, but it's not like I earn a
good living at it. Actually, I'll be in the hole as a result of writing for
this rag.
What follows is an interview I had with my bank teller when I went to
cash my first pogey cheque. I will refer to the bank teller as "TELLER" so
as to provide anonymity. Please keep in mind that "TELLER" is not to be
confused with Teller. Teller is one half of a magic group called "Penn &
Teller", while "TELLER" is the an employee of the magic organization called
"The Royal Bank". Let it come down:
COG : Hello!
"TELLER": Greetz!
COG : Am I allowed to make a deposit?
"TELLER": Wellll..
COG : Please?
"TELLER": I'll have to talk to the bank manager...
COG : Alright. It is a fine day today.
(At this point the teller leaves the counter. He quickly returns.)
"T": I love my job!
COG: Hey, I hear ya! So, about that deposit...?
"T": Gimmee.
COG: Sure thing, buddy!
"T": Hmmm.. It's from the Government of Canada, hey? These usually bounce.
COG: Really.
"T": Really.
(We laugh. Then we sigh.)
COG: I'd like to put this into my chequing account, sir.
"T": I'll have to ask a few questions first.
(I look at the teller and I notice that he is giving me a mischievous look.)
COG: Ok, shoot! I'm game!
"T": Is this a "pogey" cheque?
COG: I beg your pardon, but it is called "Employment Insurance"!!
"T": Right.
COG: No, it's true! It was called Unemployment Insurance up until a few
years ago. They changed the name to make people feel better about
their situation.
"T": Ok, then. Question Number Two.
COG: But I haven't answered the first one!
"T": And you don't intend to.
COG: Right.
"T": Right.
(More laughter. I sip a cup of tea, while "TELLER" nibbles on a shortbread
biscuit.)
"T": Why should I deposit this for you?
COG: Because you are "TELLER".
"T": Good enough for me.
COG: Me too.
AMY: As well, myself.
"T": Then it's agreed.
COG: Hello Amy!
AMY: Hi, COG..
COG: Would you like to go out for coffee? I haven't seen you since prison!
AMY: I'd love to go for coffee...! I love coffee!
COG: And I love life!
"T": Account number please?
COG: Oh, sorry. 74747474
"T": Thank you.
COG: Your very welcome. So, Amy.. What have you been doing?
AMY: Well, I've got a job with City Leisure Services. I run the wave
machine for the swimming pool in Lawson Heights.
COG: Really? How do you like it?
"T": Here's your receipt, sir.
COG: Thanks..!
AMY: I love my job!
"T": Come again, and have a nice day..!
COG: Well, I suppose I will have to come again. All of my money is here!
"T": Ha ha ha!
AMY: Ha ha ha!
COG: Ha ha ha!
"T": Well, I can honestly say that I've never heard that one before..!
AMY: Oh, COG! I declare that to be the funniest joke of the year! I love
you!
COG: I love you, too. Well, where would you like to go for coffee...?
BANK MANAGER: Mr. COG! There's an urgent phone call for you! It's the
President of the United States!
COG: Put him on hold.
BANK MANAGER: But, sir!
COG: Worry not. I'm sure that if it was an emergency, he would have called
my private line.
AMY: Oh my God!
COG: What is it, Amy?
AMY: My water just broke...!
COG: Stay calm. Lay down, and I'll deliver this baby.
AMY: I hope this doesn't hurt..! I can't abide much pain...
COG: All done, Amy. That's the fastest birth I've performed today!
AMY: And you're the father..!
COG: My stars! This is the finest day of my life! I love being on
Employment Insurance! Now let's go get that coffee..!
So as you can see, living on pogey isn't all it's cracked up to be.
I've got the razor blade ready, and I've mapped out the perfect area of my
wrist to slit. If you'll pardon me, I'm going to draw a bath. My final
bath. Forgive me Lord.
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___________________________________________________
|THE COMINTERN IS AVAILIABLE ON THE FOLLOWING BBS'S |
|~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~|
| BRING ON THE NIGHT (306) 373-4218 |
| CLUB PARADISE (306) 978-2542 |
| THE GATEWAY THROUGH TIME (306) 373-9778 |
|___________________________________________________|
| Website http://www.sfn.saskatoon.sk.ca/~ad357 |
| Email BMC at manta1@hotmail.com |
|___________________________________________________|
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#36-10/15/98
Copyright 1998 N-Com
All content is property of The Neo-Comintern.
Unauthorized use of any part of document is prohibited. All Rights Reserved.
