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The Hogs of Entropy 0944

eZine's profile picture
Published in 
The Hogs of Entropy
 · 5 years ago

  

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ggg "The Chapstick Chapter of My Life" ggg
$$$ by -> Jane & Metalchic $$$
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$$$ [ HOE E-Zine #944 -- 12/08/99 -- http://www.hoe.nu ] .,$$$
`"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""'

This is my first experience with the lip chapping therapy of
Chapstick.
I walked into Rite Aid for a beverage. I was parched and my lips
were dry and cracked. As I was at the counter waiting patiently to
purchase my drink i eyed up the black stick of chapstick. I picked him up
and added it to the purchase of my drink. He worked wonderfully to cure
my painfully dry and cracked lips. We enjoyed a nice two mid-winter weeks
together. Going on sleigh rides in the snow, and cuddling up by the warm
roaring fire that always awaited me when we went home. One afternoon we
decided to go ice skating on the nearby pond. I came home to a beautiful
fire with empty pockets and very chapped lips. He was gone, lost to the
mass of frozen water at the nearby pond.
Two weeks passed, and i finally decided i needed to go on a
mission to find another chapstick to cure my pain. I went to the local
pharmacy, with the intentions of finding a new flavor. I roamed the store
for a while and thought my mission had failed , when on my wait out with
my head down and a frown on, i spotted _HIM_. He was gorgeous. A nice
pale blue...with intricate black and white text. It was a whole new world
or lip chapping therapy. I was sure my lips were in some dimension of
heaven. I snagged him immediately. No one could stop me from getting
this chapstick. So he came home with me. He slept close to me, he came
with me when i left the house, he was with me at all times. A blissful
two years went by. We had a few fights, and when i came back back from a
cigarette walk he was nowhere to be found. But he would turn up the next
morning. And he seemed to be extra nice those mornings, curing my
chapped lips with one coat for most of the day, when he usually required
several coats a day. So i'd take him back the next morning and we would
continue on our two year journey together. It was tragic how it ended. He
came with me on a trip to Francine's in Arizona. And at a party Francine
held he was stolen, robbed, thieved from me, ripped from my loving arms.
And so, unhappily i had to return home without my medicated chapstick.
In my devastation and vulnerability, home watching T.V., a
commercial came on for the "NEW" cherry flavored medicated chapstick. It
was new and exotic, and i had to have it immediately. Back at the store,
with confidence in my new discovery, i purchased the "NEW" flavor. I took
him home and used him all night- obsessing over the medicated flavor
weaved in with the cherry zing. He reminded me of my two year journey. In
the morning when i awoke from my short night of sleep, my feelings had
changed and i realized he reminded me too much of medicated. I could not
continue on with the "NEW" flavor. So i discontinued use, i was using him
for half of his healing power...and it wouldn't have been an honest cure
for my painfully cracked lips.
I needed a new chapstick right away. I just can't go without. And
i wanted no reminder of past chapsticks, lost or tragically stolen.
At the store again, i was after regular cherry. Desperate for something
to work on my lips. He was decent, worked good most days...but would
have those days when i wished he was on a string around my neck. 3 months
went by, and i just wasn't happy. I didn't go searching for a new flavor,
or do anything voluntarily to get rid of cherry. I wrote Francine an
email one afternoon, telling her how unhappy i was since medicated was
stolen out there in Arizona. She expressed her sympathy, and gave me some
sound advice on what i should do. Leave cherry, get out now, and do what
you have to to find medicated. She was right. So i left him. Went on a
road trip with my car packed. On a mission to find my medicated that i
loved so much. After a trialing and tribulating trip across a few states,
i finally found him. Exhausted, face worn, body weak and in pain, and
lips in an unlawful state. Right when i really needed him. So we headed
home, him in my pocket near my heart. He worked wonderfully every day.
And my medicated has been with me every day since. Always there when my
lips are dry or cracked or wind burnt. And always after those nights of
long sexual encounters that involve a great amount of tongue tying' and
lip-locking.
And so this is the story of my harmonious journey with my lip
chapping cure. I think i would like it very much (if there is an
afterlife) if i was buried with my medicated chapstick. No matter what,
while still physically capable, i will apply my medicated chapstick
daily, as much as needed, until the day i pass on.

[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #944, BY JANE & METALCHIC - 12/08/99 ]

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