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The Hogs of Entropy 0908
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ggg "The Random Nybarius Internet Compendium, Vol I" ggg
$$$ by -> Nybar $$$
$$$ $$$
$$$ (* HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #908 -- 11/29/99 *) .,$$$
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This is a compilation of things Nybar has supposedly written which
appear on the Internet. It is in response to Mogel's contention that
Nybar is a "genius". These writings not only proves that Nybar is not a
genius, it proves he is a retard. Here they are:
---> (see http://fps.enterthegame.com/pgl_s4/default.htm)
Immy vs k9-gloucester
Immy seemed fidgety before this match, fiddling with his mouse,
drivers, asking that blinking lights be turned off, etc. When he heard
the map (q2dm3), he lol'd, as this is one of his fav. maps (I lol'd too,
it's funny as hell to watch this in real-time.) Gloucester, though,
quickly showed him it was no laughing matter... he got off to an early
lead of 5-0 (as I remember). Once he was ahead, he just kind of stayed
away from immortal without controlling the areas... non-aggressively
avoiding him. I was sure this was a mistake against immy, since it gives
HIM the height and armor advantage. Then, glouc got control back, and
started actively p1mping and controlling the areas. This role-reversal
seemed to take immy by suprise, and he already didn't seem to be playing
at his best (falling into the lava, etc.) After the game was over, he
"declined comment" to the commentator... he was not a happy camper at
this point.
Vorador vs Jmaster
At first, Vorador simply owns the map. In the very last part, when
it's too late, Jmaster comes back. He manages to save a portion of his
ego, but it was too little, too late.
Kuin vs Sybek
Sybek and Kuin are good friends, and they were laughing about this
afterward (which is a good thing... grudge matches from q2 <of all
things> are stupid ;) )... but while the match was on, this was total
war. Kuin straight up owns sybek with his dominating rockets and
practiced nerves (I think he's the most experienced with tournaments of
The 12.) Kuin has a lock-up at one point, when he's ahead something like
18 to -1. When they come back, he allows Sybek to get the RL while he
gets the MH. He comes out winning 19 to 0. (it's amazing an a|d<Llama>
like Kuin is doing so well, no?)
Bad-Habit versus Sabatoj
This was one of the better matches of the day. Bad-Habit jumps to
a very early lead, 5-0 I think, but Sabatoj regains his compusure and
makes a comeback. Bad-Habit re-applies the smackdown, and at this point I
think Sabatoj kind of cracked under the pressure, because his game broke
down.
Immy vs Jmaster
Haha, immy was MERCILESSLY taunting JM. I was cracking up, because
I was looking over makaveli's shoulder to watch this match on his p1mping
webcast computer, and immy kept saying "Wow JMaster, you beat Makaveli?
You're my HERO". Immy also does stuff like give Jmaster a rail gun, tell
Jmaster where he is, etc. Immortal seems to be getting scrappy after his
first-round defeat.
Sybek versus Sabatoj
*THIS IS A GREAT MATCH. GET IT RIGHT NOW.* This was a phenomenally
close match, which sabatoj tied up in the last 10 seconds before it was
over. In the overtime, it see-sawed back and forth... I almost peed
myself. Sybek finally took the match, leaving sabatoj not looking too
happy.
Kuin vs BH
(Q2DM1) Kuin plays a very aggressive game in the first part. He
does things like charge the main elevator and rushing at BH. He got a
huge 10-0 lead at about 10 minutes, and then avoided conflict while
staying in control. He played a very solid defensive game at this point.
It was a good match. Kuin told me afterward that he had played BH before,
and knew that playing aggressively would throw him off his game, since he
was used to a soft, fuzzy Kuin.
Vorador vs K9-g
This was happening at the same time as Kuin vs BH, so I didn't see
anything but the tail end of this. From the score updates, it was tied
most of the time. In the last couple seconds, gloucester was winning 4-3,
when he went up the elevator. In a last minute ploy, Vorador dropped down
on the main elevator with hyperblaster and k9-g was going up. K9-g got
taken out, amazingly. Then, he got spawn-raped. It looked like a pretty
amazing match... glouc said after that he wasn't hitting the landing
shots (when a player jumps down and you hit them on the landing). This
demo isn't up for downloading yet, but it looked like a good match.
---> (see http://fps.enterthegame.com/demos.htm)
Hi, this is Nybar, from clan a|d (ETG #afterdeath) speaking. I'd
just like to point something out, which is... HPBs are largely ignored in
the competetive realm. Now, this happens for obvious reasons, (HPB matchs
seem less impressive, even though they arguably take more skill). But it
still seems a shame to ignore the majority of the quaking public. So, I
provide these two demos. They are of a recent (april 25'th) OGL match
between AfterDeath and Regulatorz. An extra added hurdle to this match
going of smoothly was the fact that Regulatorz is west coast (and
considered by many to be the best WC HPB clan) and a|d is east coast
(we're pretty unknown, but almost assuredly one of the top 3 HPB clans).
The first match was on a West Coast server, the second on an East Coast
one. a|d wins both, but Regulatorz puts up a very good fight, especially
on the east coast server. Good games all around. Enjoy. [Footnote: These
matches are 3on3 because of technical issues.]
Afterdeath vs. Regulatorz - Two demo HPB pack from an OGL match
played on April 25th 1999. 3 on 3 teams.
---> (see http://wwwfights.com/History/daf_don.html)
Donald, being the playa' that he is, will probably draw a glock
and say, "Yow, wam gwonna bwust a cwap in yow ass!" Then, fire all his
bullet's (not at daffy's ass, at the head and chest.) After that, he will
jump into his car and run over daffy 52 times for the "Self Defence"
plea. After that, Daffy simply stands up, adjusts his beak, and proceeds
to use it to tear donald a new asshole. Even if he doesn't, he can just
call Bug's, then it is all over anyway. Either way, daffy the victor. (By
the way, Donald can't call on Disney for reinforcements because he is
such a playa' he forgot his roots. Shame, all the origina' gangstas
nevah.. but, you can see all of that in the movie Original Gangstas.)
- Nybar
---> (see http://wwwfights.com/History/daf_don.html)
Ducks just aren't able to do that much damage (I did research at
the park, taunting them with the old "Stupid duck, no cracker for you"
line. If they pecked me, it was just too damn funny to hurt.) So, seeing
as how they are both doing almost no damage, it will drag on for a while.
But since Daffy is a WB character and can take double barreled shotgun
blasts to the face and long falls, he will inevitably be the victor.
Score:
Daffy 1
Donald 0
Naturists -1
- Nybar
---> (see http://wwwfights.com/History/mibsmork.html)
"LADIEESSSSS, ANNDDD, GENTLEMANNN, MiB's HORROR BAZAAR IS PROUD TO
PRESENT: NOT-QUITE-HUMANNN, ODDITITIES! That's right ladies and gentleman!
That's right ladies and gentleman! You'll see the scrawny alien
with a crappy atari game!
You'll see partisian lookalikes from beyond the moon!
You'll see.. a completely normal person in a stupid suit that
talks funny. Only 10 cents to see this non amazing thing! This INCREDIBLE
reduction is due to his powers being a farce, and 10 cents the amount of
gas money it took to catch him. Damn, went off on a riff, knew I should
have had J do this, no, stop leaving folks! This really is the definitive
inter-galactic bazaar! Ah--damn we're broke."
- Nybar
---> (see http://www.classicgaming.com/mailbag/mail063.shtml)
From: Nybar
Subject: Your Latest Question ...
One game I *really* wish there was a sequel to is "Sword of
Vermillion" I remember busting it out, and spending 2 hours going
through the caves. I remember rooting around a cave looking for truffles,
all for the ring of water. And when I finally defeated whatshisname (long
time ago)-- whoop. They even had the rock-ass music test at the end. One
series I wish was stopped long ago was Kings Quest-- so some of 'em were
good, but come now.
---> (see http://ftp.classicgaming.com/mailbag/mail064.shtml)
From: Nybar
Subject: Game so godawful you play it anyway-
The prize for the ultimate game so crappy it's funny has to go to
Michael Jackson's Moonwalker for the Sega Genesis. This game is frikking
hillarious-- me and my friends will sit around while high to this day,
and when the little girl says "Michael!" we all shout "Monkey!" Hehehe,
and they take themselves soooooo seriously in the last part, where you're
chasing Mr. Big through space. Oh, and the Robot is so frikking cheezy,
hehehehe...
---
This is not a complete list, by any means. Believe it or not, the
incredibly geeky things have been edited out. Is that scary, or what?
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #908 - WRITTEN BY: NYBAR - 11/29/99 ]
