The Hogs of Entropy 0544

Published in

· 5 years ago

  

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   ooooo   ooooo  .oooooo.  oooooooooooo       HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #544 
   `888'   `888' d8P'  `Y8b `888'     `8 
    888     888 888      888 888             "Why Sex is NOT Better Than 
    888ooooo888 888      888 888oooo8               Masturbation" 
    888     888 888      888 888    " 
    888     888 `88b    d88' 888       o        by AltRocks [4/3/99] 
   o888o   o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8 
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        Disclaimer: This file in no way represents the author's opinions! 

        Many males, and females, I know seems to complain about not getting 
 sex.  I know they masturbate on a normal, if not daily, basis, due to the 
 fact that they are dirty horny fucks.  So, I wonder what the problem is. 
 I mean, with sex you have to worry about the other person getting 
 satisfied, diseases, pregnancy, etc.  I don't think it's that great.  I 
 mean how is a person supposed to perform under such pressure? 

        It's amazing the species has survived past the women's movement. 
 Before that a guy just clubbed a woman, or the social equivalent of it, 
 shagged her rotten.  Now us guys have to go thru a much too complex process 
 to even get a kiss goodnite.  This is far too much for the common male. 
 When he wants sex it's not a wait-3-months sort of thing... he wants it 
 within the next hour, maybe less. 

        So masturbation is much quicker and a hell of a lot better than 
 trying to find a clean, willing, and available girl.  As for the girls, 
 how often do you find a man with the ability to bring you to a great 
 orgasm?  I mean, not everyone can be like me, right?  So, it's even mroe 
 practical for women!  Well, now that I just ruined every guy who is 
 uncoordinated's chance of getting some, they better go masturbate! 

        See?  This is all working out just as I told you.  Guys wanna do 
 it, women wanna do it, but no body wants to just jump on a random person 
 from the street and say "FUCK ME!"  That's why we have opposable thumbs. 
 So, get your vasoline ready, and start working your arms.  I say we forget 
 sex and have a national masturbation day where we inform people of the 
 wonders of masturbation Vs.  sex.  You always get to finish, there's no 
 pressure (unless your parents are home), and you don't have to fiddle 
 around with contraceptives before hand.  Of course this whole file could 
 be negated if everyone in the world liked oral sex, but we all know that 
 won't happen anytime soon.  Until then, happy whacking Planet Earth! 

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 [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!   HOE #544 - WRITTEN BY: ALTROCKS - 4/3/99 ]