The Hogs of Entropy 0332

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

The Hogs of Entropy

 · 5 years ago

  

 
 '##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!! 
  ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: =========================================== 
  ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #332 !! 
  #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS!  !! 
  ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: =========================================== 
  ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "It's JUICE!"                            !! 
  ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> AnonGirl                           !! 
 ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/11/98                                 !! 
 !!========================================================================!! 

        Being a girl always trying to find new forms of "mind expansion", 
 I tend to seek out different forms of mind altering substances a lot.  I 
 like to try new things.  Sometimes ones that aren't even harmful to the 
 health.  Most of the time, yes, the substances I stumble upon are 
 illegal, but hey, who gives a shit? 

        One hot afternoon, I found myself in serious need of liquids.  My 
 mouth had been terribly dry, not just from the heat, and I felt like I 
 was going to DIE if I didn't get something to drink, fast.  I dragged 
 myself to the nearest convenience store and headed straight for the 
 drinks section.  I decided I wasn't in a Coke mood, so I checked out the 
 fruit juices. 

        Looking through the glass, I began to get paranoid.  Funky-labeled 
 bottles of drinks called "uVo" and "Fruitopia" were staring back at me. 
 I started wondering if the juices were related to my state of mind. 
 Names such as "Pink Lemonade Euphoria", "Tangerine Wavelength" and 
 "Random Architecture of Grape Strawberry Nubility" were all written on 
 the labels, describing the flavour of the drink.  I grabbed a "Fruit 
 Punch Orgy" and headed for the cash, completely confused.  I asked the 
 cashier if the label actually said "Fruit Punch Orgy", just to be sure I 
 wasn't completely out of my mind.  She assured me that the label in fact 
 read "Fruit Punch Orgy".  I downed my Fruit Punch Orgy and quenched my 
 undying thirst.  I didn't experience any sort of group sex, but I wasn't 
 thirsty anymore. 

        The next day, in a more clear-headed state of mind, I went back to 
 the store to make sure I didn't hallucinate the trippy juice names. 
 Surely enough, the names remained the same.  I bought a "Pink Lemonade 
 Euphoria" for kicks, and discovered that it was just Pink Lemonade.  I 
 didn't trip out into some crazy high where everywhere I looked was a 
 kaleidoscope of fruits and crazy harps playing everywhere with angels 
 floating around singing.  Sure it tasted good, but it was nothing close 
 to euphoric! 

        Over time I tried to understand better this wave of "Fruit 
 Awareness".  I wanted to try Aunty Goethe's Peachy-Mango Love Pain, but I 
 didn't know who this Aunty Goethe was and what kind of pain she'd be 
 into.  So I went with "Passion Fruit Awareness".  Again, I didn't become 
 One with the Juice, it didn't take me to a higher state of being, and I 
 certainly wasn't taken into some awesome euphoria. 

        After trying several different Intuitions, Euphorias, Orgies and 
 Confusions, I realized that these were all just plain fruit drinks with 
 fUnKy NaMeS.  They were tangy and fruity yes, but they were no different 
 than any other fruit drink I've had.   

        So.  Maybe once people start becoming more Advertizing-Scam 
 Alert, and less Aware of the passion fruit, they'll realize that they've 
 all been had. 

 !!========================================================================!! 
 !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!   #332 - WRITTEN BY: ANONGIRL - 12/11/98 !!