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The Hogs of Entropy 0290
'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #290 !!
#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Smashface" !!
##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Neko !!
..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 11/16/98 !!
!!========================================================================!!
She had the kind of face that I just wanted to smash from the
moment my eyes rested upon it. Her face carried some sort of stupid look
on it, not unlike a cow.
Ha.
The thought of her chewing cud makes me laugh...hmm. I guess in a
figurative sense she is chewing cud now. Or something.
Oh yeah. Getting back to where I was ... You can probably guess
by now that I've killed her. It was a pretty obvious destiny from the
time I first saw that idiot-look on her face.
We worked together. What a shit job that was. Cashiers at the
local supermarket. After working an eight hour day, I'd have more money
in my till just in cash then I've ever had at one time in my savings
account. You'd think that place could've afforded to pay us more. Cheap
bastards.
Her name was Lila or something equally stupid like that. She
reminded me of everyone I ever hated in my rather short life. I never
really got to know her, my prejudice got in the way. Fortunately I never
closed with her, or the events that just happened might have happened in
a much more public place. I can't even imagine the kind of small talk we
would've made as we waited for the customers to file through. I guess if
there's one thing I can think God for in this shitty life it's that Lila
and I never closed the store together.
Any time she would ask me one of those stupid ass cashier
questions like "Do you have any paper towels?" or "Could I borrow your
pen?" I had to try extremely hard not to say "FUCK YOU YOU STUPID ASS
BITCH" and instead grunted in the appropriate manner. I avoided talking
to her at all costs. Since simply looking at her made me sick to my
stomach, I could only imagine what carrying on a conversation with her
would do to me.
So, if I tried so hard to avoid her, how did I end up where I am
now? Good question. Things were almost perfect, except for her being
alive, and one night -- and not even a night when I was working -- they
got all fucked up.
I came in to the store about 5 minutes before it closed to get
some cigarettes (Ever since Camel lost their icon Joe Camel I got
hooked -- their new ads were MUCH cooler than those old kiddy ads) and
shoot the shit with all my friends who were stuck working.
I grabbed the Camels and walked to the front end, dodging the
'WET FLOOR' signs strewn about the area. I looked around to see who was
working. There was only one lane open and the cashier had her back
turned to me. Rob was bagging though. Cool, maybe we'd do something
after he got off work. Then, with a chuckle, the cashier turned around.
oh FUCK.
SHE was the cashier.
The ONLY cashier.
FUCK.
I tried to play off my discontent as I walked through her lane
listening to the voice of Sandra the 'courtesy' desk girl telling the
customers (me and maybe two other people at that time of night) that the
store was closign in five minutes blah blah blah -- we always thought
it'd be much more effective to simply tell them to get the fuck out
before we loosed a pack of wild dogs on them.
"Hey, Lila, Rob, how's it goin'?" I squeaked out with a slight
shudder.
"It's goin pretty good man, what're you doing tonight?" asked Rob.
Lila chuckled again -- more like cackles to my ear -- and grinned
stupidly.
"Hi Will, nice to see you in here!"
My mind repeated one phrase: fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyou, but
somehow my mouth managed to say no more than "Yeah, it's good, uh-huh.
I'm in a hurry, ring me up."
"Hey Rob, c'mere and mop the deli!" shouted one of the managers,
aka the Supreme Asshole.
Rob left me alone with her. The bastard.
"So Will, where are you going in such a hurry?"
"Uhh, a party and shit. Ring me up, please."
"Ooooh! A party! I love parties! Take me with! Let's get drunk."
An idea formulated in my head.
"Uhh, okay. Ring me up."
"Just take it."
"Okay." Hey, maybe she wasn't so bad. No.
So I waited a few minutes for the store to close and for her to
leave. She got her coat on. It had a picture of Tweety Bird on it. How
fucking stupid for a 17 year old.
We went out and got in my car and drove to the non-existant party
being held in the outback of a state park.
She asked where I was taking her and I replied heaven.
She thought I was joking, I guess, cuz she giggled and put her
hands on my crotch.
I pulled over, thinking why not. This was the end, after all.
Might as well play it for all it was worth. I killed the motor and
unbuckled, kissing her in the process.
I felt her up and she returned the favor. She actually wasn't
that bad. Oh well. Too bad. We made love. No. It was the teenage
version. We fucked. Like bunnies. It was good, but I couldn't let that
get in my way, now could I? I was on a mission. Of sorts.
After we had finished, she reclined in the bucket seat, sighing
and breathing deeply. I climbed on top of her and she giggled that
stupid way again.
"Ready for more, tee-hee?"
Finally I let loose. "FUCK YOU, YOU CHEAP FUCKING NASTY ASS SKANK
WHORE!"
She laughed and said, "What?"
I kneed her in the stomach. This added a stunned look to the
permanent stupid look on her face. The chair went back the few inches it
could as she had not locked it into position.
This was good, after I got over the initial shock, as it allowed
me more manouvering room. I kicked her in the face repeatedly. She was
too stupified to even scream.
There was blood everywhere, but by this point I didn't even care.
I left her unconscious body resting in the passenger chair and opened
the trunk. I grabbed my heavy duty Maglite from the trunk and returned to
the car.
The ending shouldn't surprise anyone -- I smashed her fucking face
in with that flashlight just like I'd been yearning to do since the first
time I saw her.
Am I sorry? Not really, only that I didn't do it sooner.
Will I be caught?
I don't even care anymore. So, yeah, probably. I'm dumped her
body in the lake, but what can I do about the bloodstains in the car?
Not much.
So now it's just me and a bloodied up car. And we're waiting for
the cops. They'll catch on, probably in the next day or so. I can't
imagine Lila staying submerged for long, and the camp is pretty popular
this time of year. Someone will find her before the week is up.
But that's not the best part yet.
The best part was afterwards, when I drove to City Pride Liquor.
They've got a drive through, see, and they don't check IDs, which is good
in my case. I hadn't put on any clothes yet, and the car was, of course,
still extremely bloody. I pulled up and asked for, and I quote myself
here, 'the biggest fucking bottle of vodka you have."
The girl working inside -- who sure as fuck didn't look old enough
to drink what she was selling -- gave me a 2 litre bottle of some foul
stuff called "Dyermo". It said it was imported from Russia, but I didn't
give a fuck. She looked pretty shocked when she saw my state. But she
didn't say anything. I gave her a fifty dollar bill that I found in
Lila's purse and drove off.
No driving off into the sunset -- more like driving off into the
sunrise. Drinking straight from the bottle was the only way to go, and I
went there. I drank the whole fucking bottle, pulled over to the side of
the road (but by that time, the way I was driving, I was pretty much
there anyway), puked out the window a couple times and fell asleep.
I guess this is the end, but the cops haven't even found her body
yet, so who knows.
As the French say, "C'est la vie."
Whatever.
!!========================================================================!!
!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #290 - WRITTEN BY: NEKO - 11/16/98 !!
