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The Hidden Obvious 035
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Welcome to the last (for quite some time) issue that I shall be writing
THO. I am not giving up THO for good mind you, but I am quite busy with
my Girlfriend, Prepairing for College, and generally having a life
outside of the BBS community. Rattle shall be taking over THO for about
2 months or so... he'll be regularly putting out issues for quite some
time, so if you want a text by yourself a THO, send it to him on his
board The Land of Rape and Honey at 609-698-1358 with the NUP of: Faith
Collapsing. You can also get in contact with him at the InterNet
address of RATTLE@CYBERCOM.COM and AIMnet address 166:166/0 and GRiMnet
26:4609/1... basically you can get in contact with him anywhere you
look... like under rocks and stuff. Enough of this bullshit, let's get
on with this issue of THO.
{|]=-----------------------------------------------------------------=[|}
THO #35
I'm a Spaz and I Like My Cow
By Pip the Angry Youth
Welcome to my pasture. I don't know what you are doing in my pasture,
this is called trespassing buddy, and I don't know who you think you
are staying in my pay phone lodge!
My name is Cornholio! I need Tee-Pee for my bunghole!
Anyways, now back to the action. Thornson is getting quite a few good
left hooks in, but I don't think that the Policeman is going to budge.
Bad Policeman, bad bad. I am very saddened that I have to witness such
tomfoolery, CLEAN YOUR ROOM!
Damnit Jim, I'm a Doctor (and a bad actor) not a Prostitute!
This is getting silly, I don't know what I am talking about right
now... I'm just typing typing and typing some more and burning out my
brain co processors. DON'T TAKE ACID OR YOU'LL END UP LIKE ME!!!!
Yes, you too can take LSD 4 times and completely fuck up your system
for the rest of your life just like I have!!! Hell, I took LSD at my
Seinior Prom, that's what I call messed up. The best part of taking LSD
is the permanant effects that you get, like seeing images about 1 second
longer than they are in front of your face. It makes driving
interesting let me tell you!!! Ask my mother, I totaled her car.
Little Nissan Sentra going down the street at about 35 mph and I turn
to tell my friend to put his seat belt on. WHAM!!! Right into the back
of a Ford Grenada. Have you ever seen one of those things?!?! It's
like a freaking tank on wheels... I learned to play the accordion in one
rather foul step! My car is no more and I will probably send my
liscence into Trenton and bum rides off of Glorified G, Domino, and
Rattle for the rest of my unnatural life. Sucks to be me.
Today I had the best sex of my life. I hit a 1 minute orgasm... of
course I pulled out because I was having unprotected sex at the time. I
don't think you have ever really experienced sex until you have it
without a condom and have your hand somewhere else other than your
crotch. Call me crazy but it's nice.
What's grosser than gross?
Seeing someone bleed out of their crotch.
What's grosser that that?
Seeing someone bleed out of their crotch while having sex with them.
What's grosser than that?
I don't know really, that's pretty bad. I see a cool text file coming
out of that idea.
Now I'm not saying that she wasn't just finishing with her period or
anything, but I'm not saying that she did. :)
THIS NEXT LINE IS DEDICATED TO JAMESY
Damn bitch, told you!
END NEXT LINE DEDICATED TO JAMESY
Did you ever see someone on fire? 23OO 5Y343[W W9JM3 7876 9H 4Q55O3[W
2QOO 285Y R843 D9J8HT 9RR 9R Y8J.... sorry, wrong home keys.
Interview with a usual sysop:
INTERVIEWER: Dark Emperor, may I call you Joey?
DARK EMPEROR: My friends call me Slappy the Love Monkey.
I: Slappy, what do you do with your life?
DE: Life? Sorry, never encountered that word. What's it mean?
I: Thank you, you allready sated my questioning thirst.
DE: Uhh... ok. [Sound of High Pitched Computer Beep in Background]
OH! I'm done downloading the Necrobeastialsodomy GIFs... err... I
meant the shareware version of Wolfenstein 3D... yeah, that's it.
I: Is there anything else you would like to say to the reading
audience?
DE: Yes, call my board at 908-288-1043.
I: Thank you.
[Enter large nosed Viking holding a stuffed pepper.]
VIKING: Damn bitch, told you!
[Dark "Slappy the Love Monkey" Emperor takes pepper and rubs it all over
his crotch. After finishing this act he starts singing "God Save the
Queen" (Sadly enough, it wasn't the Sex Pistols version) and
spontaniously explodes.]
I: Now wasn't that special. Now for our next (and much more talented
and pleasing) guest, Barney!
BARNEY: Hello boys and girls, today we'll...
[Rambo enters from the right and shoots Barney dead]
I: Thank you very much... is there anything that you want to say to the
audience?
RAMBO: Yo... uh... Adrian!
ADRIAN: Rocky!
RAMBO: Adrian!
ADRIAN: Rocky!
RAMBO: Adrian!
ADRIAN: Rocky!
RAMBO: Adrian!
ADRIAN: Rocky!
RAMBO: Adrian!
ADRIAN: Rocky!
[Promptly, the whole world goes blank for I don't know where to go from
here.]
THIS WORD IS DEDICATED TO PANTHER
(mailbox)
That is it for THO #35. Peace, we out.
aND NoW a WoRD FRoM ouR SPoNSoRS...
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ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
³ The Obloid Sphere BBS ³
³ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄij
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ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
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Ü þ The Land of Rape and Honey þ Ü
ÞÛ [MiLK/THO/FuHD/TLS] ÛÜ
Û Ý
ÝÝ SysGod: Rattle Û ÛÞ
ÝÛÝ ÝÝ 9600-28.8k USR ÝÝ ÜÛÛ
Ý ßÞÜ ÝÛ NUP: FAITH COLLAPSING ÞÛß ßßß Ý
Û ÜÝ ÜÜ ÜÝ
ÛÜÜ ÜÛ ÜÜÛÛÛÝÜÜÜ ÜÜÛÛÛÝÛßÛÜßßßßßßßßÜÜÛÛÛÝÝÛÛÝÝÝÛÛÝÛÜÛ ÜÜÛÛß
ßÛÛÛÛÝÛÜÛÛÛÛÛÛÜÛÛ ßßßß ÛÛÛÛÛ ÞÛÛ ßßÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛß
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ÛÛ ÜÛß ßÛ ÞÜ ßÛ
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ß ÜÜÛÛÛÛÝÛÛÛÝÛÛÝÝßÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛßÛÛÛ
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AIMnet 609 Host: ÞÛ ÞÛ Ý ÞÝ ß Ý ÛÛ GRiMnet 609 Hub:
166:1609/0 ÛÝ ß ÞÛ 26:4609/1 /0
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WHQ - Asylum - WHQ
SysOp: Panther
9o8ú914ú9318
2400-14.4k
34o Megz OnLine
CD-ROM
NUP: I LOVE FEDS
DISTROBUTION SITES
Sports Authority BBS (9o8)341ú2416
SysOp: Glírified G
'Jersey's only Sports Orientated
BBS that I know of! Call today!
Land of Rape and Honey (6o9)698ú1358
9600-28.8k USR
SysOp: Rattle
One of the last 'sp3cial' BBSes in
its area. CD-ROM H/P/V/A
NUP: FAITH COLLAPSING
Violent Playground (9o8)92o-2725
SysOp: Ffejtable?
2.6 GIGS! 2 dialdown nodes, CD-ROM,
New User Voting. Home of FfejWare
Obloid Sphere (7o8)965-3o98
SysOp: James Hetfield
Chicago HQ
MiLK WHQ
Phoenix Modernz Systems (9o8)830-7786
SysOp: Tal Meta
THE text file board! Home of GODnet.
345 megs allmost full of archived text!
(Seems like everyone and their brother has a CD-ROM)
