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Tcahr Issue 37
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"To aid in the incubation, breeding, and release of butterflies in Asia."
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Vol. 02, Iss. 13 SoC File Two
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"Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands,
hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats."
-- Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)
That is the quote I chose about three weeks ago to begin my next installment
for the Polymemetic Textfile Project. It was to be a textfile of unprecedented
intellectual cartoon villiany.
However the last month has me questioning the internal security of TCAHR. The
previous idea for an issue was cancelled due to the same subject matter being
covered by another memeplex in the textfiles scene. Yesterday I'm checking out
the latest textfiles only to see see my newest idea in yet another textfile
meme factory.
Now there can only be two explainations for this happening. The first is that
my ideas are unoriginal and stale and of the kind that have been bantered about
hundreds of times before. That would make me unoriginal and stale. I refuse
this line of thought.
The only plausible sane answer is that agents from these two e-zines have
hired ninjas to infiltrate my base of operations. I believe they must have
bugged the only place conductive to memetic information interchange: the break
room. At this moment Mr. Coffee, which has obviously been comprimised, is in
the tunnels for "questioning".
As a result of this, I am forced to offer up another dashed-off Stream of
Consciousness file for your reading enjoyment. You only have your ninjas to
blame.
The Jaguar
TCAHR CEO
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I. "This line just begins the function startUp."
-- Tom Negrino & Dori Smith, "JavaScript for the World Wide
Web, 2nd Edition"
II. "She talked to Toto as she swept the floor, as she told Aunty Em
she loved her, as she greased Uncle Henry's boots."
-- Geoff Ryman, "Was"
III. "The I Ching (or Book of Changes) is probably the most famous
treatise known in the East or West concerning divination and the
philosophy of change."
-- Bill Whitcomb, "The Magician's Companion"
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I. "This line just begins the function startUp."
-- Tom Negrino & Dori Smith, "JavaScript for the World Wide Web,
2nd Edition"
I would say that it was an error if it weren't for the marvelous results.
There should be a word for accidents so full of amazement and beauty that
the idea of it shouldn't be lessened by the use of words with negative
connotations like "error", "accident", or "mistake". When's the last time
that the existence of a goddess was proven through a mathematical equation?
I was working late at the office forcing myself through another PowerPoint
presentation. PowerPoint is the false Holy Grail of the corporate world.
I got this idiotic job by knowing PowerPoint. It was one of the first
things the recruiter asked me about. "Do you know PowerPoint", she asked
with a voice hinted with expectant disappointment and mundane wonderment.
Of course I know PowerPoint. A retarded monkey with a banana laced with
radioactive chemicals can do PowerPoint. Click this, drag that, and type
that; human resource personnel are so stupid. "Do you know PowerPoint" is
akin to asking someone who knows Word 6.0 if they can operate verison 7.0.
I can also add two and two together and come up with five. That's a joke
for those of you of the "1984" persuation. Anyway, I decided to switch
over to the calculator program and do some permutations and pallendrome
addition. Isn't the word "serependipity"? I mean the word for an accident
that shouldn't be called an accident. Okay, what's the word when something
keeps happening to get your attention? I just had it and lost it.
Synchronicity? No, this is not synchronic. It wasn't as if I was focused
by the apperance of a million goddesses; just one. And since she appeared
while using a Windows application she couldn't have been a very good
goddess. I'd say it was Kali, but everyone knows Kali rules the realm of
the blue screen of death. Anyway, I was doing a pallendrome of the number
II. "She talked to Toto as she swept the floor, as she told Aunty Em she loved
her, as she greased Uncle Henry's boots."
-- Geoff Ryman, "Was"
Perhaps it's a male thing. Now don't get me wrong; when it comes to women
I have always loved the strong ones. There's something so exquisitively
attractive to me about a Kung-Fu fighting, quantum physics-quoting,
opinionated woman. I remember back in the military during MOS school there
was this older woman with whom I would talk about Freud, existentalism, and
capitialism. She was fast and strong and oh boy! I really could have fell
for her. It doesn't have to be all of them; I'd be happy with either the
Kung-Fu fighter, the quantum physicist, or the woman with the opinion. I
just love strength of all kinds. I may be even so bold as to say a have a
strength fetish. But somewhere in a deep depression in my libido, there's
something that hungers for something cute and empty-headed. A desire for
the conquest or aquisition of beauty however empty and devoid of meaning.
I guess that's why I have a certain attraction for fictional characters
such as Dorothy from the "Wizard of Oz" and Alice from "Alice in
Wonderland". I even have a thing for Jasmine from the Disney version of
"Aladdin". That's why I think the people who indulge in cosplay have the
right idea. For all of you in the dark, cosplay = costume play. Imagine
a room full of people dressed like anime characters. It's enough to make
your mouth water if you were into that sort of thing. Not me though, I
like the idea, but I've always found anime characters to be drawn so
generically of face and body that they seem rather sexless. Besides when
I watch anime or read magna I prefer chibis and I'm not about to imagine
sex with something that is so "kawaii". I mean "chibi" pretty much
translates as "super-deformed", doesn't it? Doesn't sound too sexy, does
it? I'll stick to people in Snow-White costumes thank you very much. I
III. "The I Ching (or Book of Changes) is probably the most famous treatise
known in the East or West concerning divination and the philosophy of
change."
-- Bill Whitcomb, "The Magician's Companion"
There's an old Taoist story which mentions Buddha. Doesn't that make it a
Buddhist story? Buddha called all the animals of the world to meet with
him to discuss the plight of humanity. Only 12 animals showed up. Buddha
told these 12 animals that they would be honored because they showed up.
They would be the teachers of humanity as members of the Chinese horoscope.
These animals, featured on placemats in every Chinese resturant in the
Western hemisphere, are meant to remind us that sometimes we must be as
fierce as a tiger, as clever as a monkey, as loyal as a dog, etc. I told
this story once to someone who professed to be a Taoist. He said he
preferred the yin-yang theory. Now I never refuted the yin and the yang of
Chinese Taoism, yet he couldn't accept this other story. I've always had
somewhat of a problem with Americans and Europeans who are so quick to
adopt the magical and religious traditions of the East. The first reason
is our nature to bequeath anything different from our established way of
thinking as different and therefore spirtual when it come to Eastern
culture. There are plenty of bogus systems of magic to dabble in from the
Western world as there are in the Eastern world. Though the Wiccan faith
has a stranglehold on the current practice of magical religions, let's not
forget the Themeians, the Order of the Golden Dawn, the Rosecurians and
whatnot. The second reason is closely allied to the first: a lack of
knowledge of the proper language voids you knowing the full text of Eastern
religion. It is not possible to be a true Taoist without knowing Chinese.
There is a system of rank and a multitude of rituals that need a strong
background in Chinese. Not that you can't learn from the symbols we do
know, but to give ourselves titles such as "Taoist" or "Buddhist" is only
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The Committee Against Human Rights -- http://maq.port5.com
TCAHR Manifesto -- http://maq.port5.com/disman.html
The Polymemetic Textfile Project -- http://maq.port5.com/polymemetic.txt
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tcahr@hotmail.com Copyright 2002
