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Pizza Underground Digest Volume 3 Issue 11
Lines in this issue: 286 Total K-ege du0d: 14628 bytes.
PREREGISTERED EDITION OF PUD!!! PREREGISTERED EDITION OF PUD!!!
ÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
³uDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUdPuDpUd
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³uD³ PiZZA UNDERGROUND DiGEST Volume 3 Issue 11 Epic 12321 Baphomet ³pUd
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ÅÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´
³ ³
³ "So have you come to kill me?" [1] ³
³ ³
³ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
³SPECIAL STUFF IN THIS ISSUE! READ NOW! SPECIAL STUFF IN THIS ISSUE! READ NOW!
³SPECIAL STUFF IN THIS ISSUE! READ NOW! SPECIAL STUFF IN THIS ISSUE! READ NOW!
ÅÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
³ What's off in this issue of the snap-happiest publication you will ever ³
³ feast your morbid sad little pervet lame-ass eye on? ³
³ ³
³ o Submission from Pure Energy. ³
³ o Mail from John McAfee. ³
³ o Stealing Day Old Bread for PhUn aNd PrOphEt. ³
³ o FReD's Guide to Women. ³
³ o Official PUD Membership List! ³
³ o Ways to be swass. ³
³ o More! ³
ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
³
³ Mail From Squinky.
³
³ Always one to satisfy, be it women, bea..er um nevermind. Here is some
mail from squinky. he said put it in a pud so I did.
(13/15): Well.
Name: Squinky #247 @2506
Date: Sat Jun 12 01:59:49 1993
RE: fr0?
[Stuff edited out to protect the innocent, namely me.]
My hair went through a comsic metaphysically change today. I went swimming in
the ocean, and then, it started to look like one of the guys from KIss's hair.
Put that in your pud, and Publish it.
PHUN!@!
þ Pure Energy in Pud? Huh?
Little known to most before Pure Energy was in [NuKE] he had long since
aspired to be one of the few and proud most legendary members of the
Pizza Underground. But alas we figured he was to much of a punk middle
aged freak to be allowed to hang around with us so we of course turned
him down. He got really upset us and well threatened some rather mean
things but anyways that is better left to the past. After he showed up
at NO COURiER's[2] funeral we went out and had some coffee. We talked
for a while and after I refused to 'go back to his place' we decided he
could now join the ranks of pud. So here is THE first submission he made
way back when on the faithfull day we turned him down...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VIRuZeZ ANd STUfF By: PURe eNeRGY Of [PuD] [3]
SO yOU WAnT TO WRiTE soMe VIRuZEs wELL wE aLL d0 aND i CAN shOW yOU hOW
rEAlly EASy WIth SOME nEAT0 bATCh FiLE tRIOCKs trHAT i LEARNed fROM sOME
DU0DEz VIN THIS gROUp CaLLeD [nUke]. tHeY wIll n0t LET me iN BUT ThAT IS
0K siNcE i Am Off IN pud NOW anYWayZ. oK SO TO WRITE a bACTH fILE vIRUz
iS rEALLY vcEY eASY, DU0D.
sTEP ONE: lEARN BATCH fILE sTUFF.
a BATCHG FILE IS LIKE AN EXE oR c0M fILE EXCEPT dIFFErENT
STEP tWO: hoW yOU rUN THEM.
yOU TYPE ThE nAME weITHER aN EXTENIOn OR not.
sTEP THrEE: wRITING OnE.
bAYTCH FILes CAN only VE wriTTEn WIth EDLIN OR edlinpr0. aLL THE oTHER
tEXt editORS don't COMPIULe WrITE. yOUr bATch fiLE caN bE SOMeHTING lIKE
tHIS siMPLE eXAMPLe ONE:
{PuDPOX VERSION 1.0}
ECHO dU0D THIS bATcH vIRUz REQUIrES 4dOS[4] pRESz ctrl-c IF yOU dON'T hAVE IT.
PAUSE
COLOR RED ON WHITE
EXCEPT (*.BAT) DEL C:\*.* /S/Q/Y
COPY PUDPOX.BAT COMMAND.COM
ECHO dU0d yOU hAVE bEEN hIT bY The pUDp0X vIRUz! yOUR D00MED!
PROMPT HAhjaehEHAhaehHAEHEEAEAHAEHEA $p$g
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So maybe now you can see why exactly we didn't see it was time to let
him in but we have since changed our minds and decided that it would
be great to have him off in the group with us. Yep more than great it
would be swell even.
þ Mail From John McAfee
(9/12): Well.
Name: John McAffee #1 @2506
Date: Sun Jun 13 04:21:29 1993
Dear mister King, must we go through all of this again? I am really thinking
of informing the police of your latest tirades as they are getting very rude
and well socially unnaceptable. Why do you insist on burying small animals
in my front yard? I will admit it first it was kinda cute seeing small animal
parts sticking up out of the ground first thing in the morning but after a
while it grows tiresome. At least you could bury them all of the way. My wife
has said now on at least ten different occasions when I was beating her that
she no longer loves you. Therfore I have asked her to return the life size
statue of you. Although my daughter like the "pubic" section of the statue
and played with it daily I think the statue was a little on the rude side.
Surely you don't always walk around with such an erection?! Also my daughter
may like being refered to as your 'little bondage suck girl', I find this a
little more than offensive. Furthermore the ridicule of my av products is
quite boring now. Can you not come up with anything new? Must you use the
same old problems that are in every version? I find that shows a rather large
lack of imagination on your part. Well I must go now, my little boy wants his
nightly spanking now and oh do I enj...er hopefully will not talk to you at a
later date. Sincerely,
John McAffee
þ STeaLiNG BReaD!
By: The BLT. [Brave Little Toaster]
Many times have I the greatest thief in the world been asked how does
one go about atealin' some bread. Well with a little careful planning
it is quite easy. And if done right with a minimal loss of life as
well. The trick to stealin' bread is to not over do it. Although a
few grenades may seem like the proper tool[5] a mere machine gun will
usually more than surfice. And just think about it if you stole have
stolen a toaster like I told you how in my previous submissions not
only will you be k-c00l rich but you'll be full to. What more could
one possibly want!? Ok so you want to get some bread. I prefer the
sunbeam places. Why? Because they seem to have very little in the ways
of security, usually just a little girl out front selling girl scout
cookies. Easy kill. Once inside there will be a bunch of old ladies
gun the hags down. They have lived long enough anyways. Look for the
women who is behing the counter SHE will be tough. I got maced once
and had to beat the shit of the woman before I killed her don't let it
happen to you. Once you have killed everyone grab some bred and head
for the door. Now comes the tough part, outside the little girl will,
if you forgot to kill her, be screaming and stuff. Now you can kill
her or do like fReD does and just scoop her up and take her along for
the ride. Whichever way is fine by me. So now you have some bread and
what with the loss of only 5 to 12 lives, not bad, no, not bad at all.
þ [MaF]ÚÄ¿ASCii!!! ±±±
ÚÄÄÄÄ´ ³ ÉËÍÍÍÍÍ ±±±±±±±
³ ³ ³ ÚÄÄÄ¿ ºº ÚÄÄÄı ± ±
³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ºº ²²²²² ÚÙ ±±±
³ ³ ³ ³ ³ ºÈÍÍÍ ²²²²² ÄÄÙ ± ±
³ ³ ³ ³ ÚÄÁ¿ º ²²²²²²² ± ± °°°°°°°°°°°°°°
³ ³ ³ÄÙ ÀÄ¿ ²²²²²²²²²² °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±°
³ ³ ³ ÀÄÄÄ °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
³ °°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
°°°°°°±°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
± °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
± °°°°°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±±±±± ±°
± °°°°°°°°°°°°°° ±±±±±±±±±°
±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±°
Entitled: The wonderous voyage of the WaReZ du0d.
Explained: This is a concept piece by none other than G-bunny. It shows
how the oppressive foot of mankind[large bottom part] is even
ruled by the forces of nature as displayed by the mighty hunter
[top-right] killing the water-buffalo[middle]. As G-Bunny put
it, 'man is never free of death, and death of man.'
þ fReD's GUiDE to WOMeN!
Du0Dz! SeIng How I g0t Mo Women Than MOSt Of YOu WILl EVEr SEE I WIll
Tell YOU HOw to Get SOme. IT's K-C00ol And POHun tOO.
FIrsT YOu NeeD SOme PICk UP LINes HEre ARe A feW of MY FavS.
1>HEY LiTTlE GIrl WaNT SOme CaNDY?
2>WAnnA RIde In MY Van LirttLe GIrL?
3>BABEY, I gOT THe NeW NEW KiDS ALBUM.
4>Get over here bitch.[4]
5>Woooooha baby Like That hair. <-DoOsN'T WORK AlwAYs.
6>So iS yOUR tWat FreShly ShaVen?
7>My DaD hAD BreAstusus BigGer THan YouRS.
8>My DaDY WiLL JoIN Us.
9>My DoGS a ReAL Stud, babe.
Um TheRE ARe MOre Can'T REWMmbER tHEm ALL now LooK fOR moRE iN a PuD
NeaR YOU.
þ The OFFICAL [PuD] Membership list!
Here is the new current updated membership list. All of these people
listed are known social freaks who enjoy writing for pud. You may be
suprised at a few names on the list as they have recently joined us
in our greatest of tasks, the destruction of mankind.
PUD MEMBERS ARE:
Mooga
Pure Energy
Squinky
Roast
Baphomet the Limbo King
Fridrik Skulason
NO COURiER
Hymie
ErIc Bl00DaXe
Crowe
Biscuit
The BLT
fReD
G-Bunny
þ Ways to be Swass.
So being k-cOol isn't good enough for you any more? Ya wanns be all kinds
of swass now? Well too fucking bad. If we let everyone in on our little
secrets of swassdom the world would be a much sadder place. A place as
sad as that great ol' MTV. DAMN we wouldn't want that now would we? No
we wouldn't. That would be bad. Very, very bad.
þ Anger, frustration, humility.
If I get up off of my lazy ass and go all the way to the local payphone
[Remember were to LaMe to phreak like REAL du0udz!] and dial up some
loser's number they had better not just let the FUCKING phone ring, This
has happened to me recently by a few people. But one in particular, 'Oh
the phone probably rang 300 times..." Damn he must really suck.
þ Support Sites.
Ok not support sites but places I know you can at least pick up a few
meager issues of pud. There are more and if you have some puds up for
dl email me or someone else and we will try to add you to this list.
JUsT ImaGInE FaMe And FOrTUne Du0D!
Project-X 300-14.4k (205)882-0894 Sysop: Digital Saint.
Caustic Contagion 300-14.4k (817)776-9564 Sysop: Uncle Henry.
Cybernetic Violence 2400-14.4k (514)426-9194 Sysop: Some guy in YAM.
Obloid Sphere 300-14.4k (708)965-3098 Sysop: I forgot.
þ Qoute Sources.
[1]: Went through a certain individuals mind recdently.
[2]: A bleak and sad day for all of modem kind. What I can't seem to
understand is why there was so much damn cheering and joy there. It
was as if a great demon had been put to rest. Gee NO COURiER we will
miss you greatly.
[3]: Pure Energy also submitted some k_rAd ANSi's and a way-c00l VGA
loader with his batch file virus.
[4]: NO not DOS 4.0 you fucking idiots...
[5]: An object used in the aid of completion of a task.
[6]: ACtUALLY I goT THIs One FroM tHe LATe GrEAT NO COURiER. Du0D I
WILL ALwAYS REmEMbeR YOU and THAt TIme IN THe BArn Is Just BetEEn
Us, d0oud.
[7]: Out of jail, fReD seems to be back heading towards his old law
abiding ways.
þ Mail addresses and such.
Send mail to:
----------------------------------------------------------------------
NO COURiER 36@2506 [He's dead you know.]
Baphomet the Limbo King 14@2506 or [crfisher@nyx.cs.du.edu]
Hymie 86@2506 or [mpruitt@uahcs2.cs.du.edu]
Squinky 247@2506 [He loves gerbils.]
Crowe 240@2506 or on Vnet! haehehheehahheehhe
----------------------------------------------------------------------
FReD tHe ChiLd MolEstEr Off at the tennis courts.
Mooga the Whale Currently off at Kroger's.
The Brave Little Toaster Hittin' on NO COURiER's former love
chevron girl.
Roast Betty Ford Clinic.
Biscuit Wondering if it is really right for her
to love a rabbit so much.
G-Bunny Wonder if her mother will approve of her
her new lesbian chicken relationship.
Released on the date: Thu 06-17-1993
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
³ Closing Qoute: ³
³ "There's no business like the kiddie-porn business..." ³
³ - fReD[7] ³
ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ
