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Pizza Underground Digest Volume 1 Issue 08
ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ-ùúù-ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿
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ISSuE 8, VOLuME 1
- BRiLLIANCE IS NEiTHER -
- LOST NOR GAINeD; -
- I ALREaDY HAVE IT ALL -
[PUD_1_8.TXT]
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ-ùúù-ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
> EDiTED BY NO COURiER ú WWiVNET 2506@36 <
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ-ùúù-ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
D¡SCL¡MäR
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
The opinions, views, ideals, and tasty canned soup recipes expressed in this
T/FiLE are expressed without intention of execution. The authors, editors, and
contributers to this file, as well as all of the K-RAD/[PuD], áçá, PGA, and r
members, assume absolutely ¯N0® liability for you personal stupidity.
Thank you.
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
þ WELC0ME BaCK
Welcome back to the "Computer Underground's" FiNEST T/FiLE creation yet:
K-RaD/[PuD]'s PiZZA UNDERGRoUND DiGEST!
*** INTERRuPTIoN - NO COURiER's PATeNTED "Quote of Today's Line #38" ***********
"Drop your flounder, the chocalate bar boiled my winds."
***************************** RESUMiNG:
We certainly hope you all enjoy, and submit whaever you want. The future of
PuD looks good. We are looking for members, LaME DiST SiTES, and anybody who
has the gall to contribute to the Underground's finest.
SeND US SHiT. I don't care WHaT it is, as long as it is in ASCii! E/MAiL
PuD's SENiOR EDiTORS, NO COURiER & Baphomet the Limbo King, at the following
WWiVNeT addresses:
Baphomet the Limbo King: WWiVNeT 2506@14 - NO COURiER: WWiVNeT 2506@36
MAiL US.
þ RESPoNSE
Hell, there hasn't been any response as of yet- PuD just got BuSY releasing
the K-RaD/[PuD] series a few days ago.
Any response is looked over, and will probably be mentioned. We want to make
fun of you. Please write.
þ CORReCTIONS / EDiTOR's STaTEMeNTS
All that appears to be a mistake to the untrained eye is actually intentional.
Pud is perfect in every way. We don't fuck up.
In PuD Issue 1:6, fReD's article `IF SHE IS AS G00D AS SHE SaYS, WHY DOES SHE
WaNT ME?' seemed to of caused slight confusion and misunderstanding.
fReD will not take over and destory the world - just your mind.
Apologies for any alarm caused.
Any disgruntling remarks about VBBS and it's outstanding SysOps should of been
ignored. Such stressful topics can anger a VBBS SysOp while he's still learning
to read an all..... PiSS 0FF.
- NO COURiER
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ-ùú FEATuRED IN THiS ACTiON-PaCKED ISSuE OF PuD úù-ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
þ VIRTuALNeT HATEMAiL > I received 42 messages today... by NO COURiER (Line 74)
þ ANoTHER FiNE POeM BY NO COURiER: "THE HEaT 0F THE WaReZ" (Line 138)
þ KNITTiNG - MoRE FUN THAN YOU THiNK by JUNior (Line 151)
þ MY FRiEND THE DANCiNG ARTiCHOKE > A short story by NO COURiER (Line 165)
ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ-ùú AND N0W, 0n WiTH THE PHPHPHPHPHun! úù-ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ
þ ViRTUaLNeT R00000lz, d00d. DaMMit, I EaT YOU FAGG0TS FOR LuNCH.
The following documents the bullshit that hear most every day on VirtualNet.
Beside from being the most poorly constructed Net/Echo of today, it caters to
all rejects of other nets. Felony, Celerity, even Fido.
It is here that we see just what type of people these VBBS freaks are. Lame
as shit. Sometimes, I wish I had a sawed-pff shotgun.
Enjoy. I hear this every day. ONLY on VirtualNet do you hear of ACTUAL VBBS
SYSoPS who have NEVeR even HEaRD of Celerity. I hope mommy & daddy stop paying
your phone bills, you fuckin' idiots.
- NO COURiER
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
71/1 Email
Title: Piracy
Date: Sat Feb 20, 1993 00:24:53 (3 days old)
Origin: Unknown System (Unknown) [?]
From: The Gingham Dog #1 @1215059 VirtualSUX
To: NO COURiER #22 @xxxxxxx VirtualSUX
_______________________________________________________________________________
-BEGiN QUOTE-
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Regarding: Piracy
> something VBBS, because they are programmed in real languages. They also
> support real, ORGANIZED nets that run solid. They also support the
> capability of keeping people like you OFF of them EASILY.
Perhaps you would find it more to your liking to join one of those criminal
net a get off this one. Your type as well as not being useful to society are
not welcome here. If I see another one of your low I.Q. posts your sysop will
be instructed to remove you from his callers list. Go play in another sandbox
kid.
Bill Snell
Region 2 RC
_______________________________________________________________________________
-END QUOTE-
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
IS THIS A RUDE ATTEMPT AT VIRTUALNET MODERATION?
I hope not. I belong to several of your so-called "Criminal Nets." Too
bad you couldn't get access and are still pissed off about it. I still won't
vouch for you.
Anyway, it is on these big bad criminal nets that you have a chance to
keep up with what is going on, to discuss and read about new ideas and such
via a BBS written in something other than QuickBasic. That means you don't
have time to count to ten while wating for the BBS to find the date of the
file. We wouldn't now about any such slow BBS wares, would we?
Nope. Not at all. I'm glad you found a goal in life, to try and clean
up VNet. It will take you a while to sort through all of those messages...
replies of one line with the entire previous quoted. I hate to tell you, but
VNet is about as close to a Net/Echo as your ranting and raving is to a
message of substance.
Find a life. I'll stay in my sandbox... you need to get out of the catpan.
VirtualNet: _Virtually_ a REAL net.
Damn, you suck.
- NO COURiER
===============================================================================
þ HERE WE G0 AGAiN! PRAiSE THE POeT WHo KNoZe iT, and DoESN'T SHoZe iT!
The Heat of The Warez
Thou who layest before me shall see what is too be thrown upon our board,
the choicest of the best vulnerable to our horde.
In these blurs of PCR's and file points the first to get the new
Will forego this torment and return the same to you.
I had to call long distance, to get what I could acquire.
I give to you, with no returns, the game of your desire.
I ask for not, and you shall see the purpose.
Return the same to me.
þ KNiTTING - MORE FUN THaN YOU THiNK by JUNior
Knitting much more than what the commoner's eye views. Knitting has proved
itself to be the portal to the negative dimension. A reality so perversely
entangled with the textile arts that one shall be overjoyed by his own presence.
Knitting is more fun than you think. Just the other day, I saw a paranoic
who, while nervously biting the flesh where his fingernails had once been, told
of his accidental fumble in to the realm of the mighty god of crosstitch. He
told of how he felt as he descended down the woven steps, and cowered at the
god's feet. He told of his fear, and his grotesque sudden personal paradise
which he had found within this world. Enter this. You may find the way to
dimension -1, the dimension where division by zero is defined, with your ball of
yarn as the guide. This is how it is done; this is the end of the positive.
þ MY FRiEND, THE DANCiNG ARTiCHOKE by NO COURiER
Ahh, t'was not long ago I met him. He danced in my head for a year at a time,
for every hour I dreamt. His name was Francis. Francis the Dancing Artichoke.
Francis and I became friends shortly after I found him once more at a local
grocery store. I brought him home with me. Francis and I danced the night away,
festively forgetting of our independant tortuous lives. The next morning, we
joyfully cast off our souls, foolishly thinking we could remain this way
forever. We could not of been more happy, nor wrong.
Utopia. We lived there, the place Sir Thomas More had only dreamed about. We
had found this within our hearts. We danced away the minutes. The hours. Days.
Soon, I found this Utopia growing tiresome. I could not find a more powerful
feeling within my heart alone, even if the feeling were shared. I worried.
I soon decided that we would both be happy if only one of us was. I ripped
out the artichoke's heart and ate it, howling like a savage vegetarian returning
from the hunt. Without utensil's, I dug in to Francis' heart. He was still
holding on. The expression of writhing pain on his sad face showed how much he
agreed to the idea. He kept dancing as he screamed in horror. As I ate
hungrily and viciously, his stalk soon grew weak, his moans of agony fading.
Francis died as I applied the Hidden Valley Ranch. I laughed.
- NO COURiER
þ > C00l, MaN, it's the ENd of PuD #8, D0000000000d! < þ
þ 3... 2... 1... CONTaCT!
To contact the senior editing staff of the Pizza Underground Digest, E/Mail via
WWiVNet at the following addresses:
NO COURiER þ WWiVNet 2506@36 þ
Baphomet The Limbo King þ WWiVNet 2506@14 þ
þ DiSTRiBUTION
So far, there is only ONE place to get the NEWeST PuD ISSuES.
>> Your LaME-ASS BBS COuLD BE LISTeD BELOW! E/MAiL US FOR iNFO! <<
Sys/NaME Head Cheese comes after ATDT ápS sW ADDReSSeSSssSS
--------- ------------- -------------- ------ ---- --------------
PROJeCT/X ³ Digital Saint ³ 1.205/883ù0894 ³ 12/144 ³ WWiV ³ WWiVNet 2506 ³
þ THaNX
...go to Digital Saint, for almost acting as if he would take us seriously!
Woooooooooooooooooo hooooooooooo hooooooooooo!! Yip yip!
<*** End of FUCKiN File ***>
