Money Incorporated Digest 34

Published in

· 5 years ago

  

MONEY INC DIGEST #34 
RELEASED 17 MARCH 1995 
(PROBABLY BEFORE MONEY #33!) 

CONCEPT AND TYPED BY: SLEEPY 
TODAY'S TOPIC : YOUR DAD SUCKS DICK, OR FORGERY FOR THE LAYMER 

MONEY INC. IS: 
                SLEEPY 
                SONIC FURY 
                CCRIDER 
                THE BIG CHEESE 
                METHOD MAN 
                ORGASMIC ANOMALY 
                SEXECUTIONER 

The topic of this article, is to briefly hash over the importance of good 
forgery skills in a succesful con.  The laser printer can be the greatest 
invention since sliced bread if you know how to use it right. 

For example, say you are stuck without a car, and in order to get a car loan 
you must produce a pay stub.  Unfortunately, you don't have a job.  Besides 
worrying how to pay for the car you MUST have that pay stub.  Well, I will 
teach you how to forge one in a few simple steps.  All you need is a pay stub 
of some sort, to calculate the percentages of taxes.  Each state and/or  
country has its own tax rates, so these will vary.  Also, you must have a 
stub from someone who makes close to what you are pretending to make, since 
that has a bearing on Federal tax rates. 

First, boot up Word Perfect, and select a nice simple font, preferably a Sans 
Serif type, since most stubs are simple.  Next use shitty paper, no company 
that has brains makes pay stubs on good laser stock.  Finally, make sure 
the whole thing fits in an area the size of a check, or about 1/3 of a page. 
Some places sell three part paper, and that would be great.  Make sure 
you include: Address, name, social security number and year to date figures 
for everything. 

Next, if you wish you may make a photocopy of this and try passing that off 
first, stating "I wanted to keep my stub, but I made you a Xerox of it.  Go 
ahead and keep it."  This usually works, since all they do is make a copy  
and give it back! 

Finally, do this at a loan company or car dealer far from your home, since they 
most likely will not call long distance to confirm if you have a pay stub.  If 
they do, just keep your cool and casually leave while they do it.  If they do  
it without you around, just claim you got fired or something. 

If you follow these rules you'll be getting that credit that you deserve (and 
can't afford!) in no time!  Till next time, remember the Money Inc Motto 

WIN IF YOU MAY, LOSE IF YOU MUST, BUT ALWAYS, ALWAYS CHEAT! 

MONEY INC IS:   SLEEPY - WORLD LEADER 
                SONIC FURY - BONG TESTER 
                CCRIDER - WAREZ GOD 
                THE BIG CHEESE - WE DON'T KNOW WHAT HE DOES 
                METHOD MAN - OUTTA JAIL! 
                ORGASMIC ANOMALY - COMPLETE MYSTERY 
                SEXECUTIONER - SEXCELLENT!