Mind Warp File 89

Published in

· 5 years ago

  

                                        
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              [ Mind Warp  -  Volume #6, Issue #09, File #89 ] 
                 [ Excuses to Get Out of Class - by Raven ] 
                       
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                         Excuses to Get Out of Class 
                                   [raven] 
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        What?  Another stupid list of ideas?  Yup, this time, I've got 
idiotic excuses to get out of class (many of which I have tried, some of 
which actually worked...).  Enjoy. 

1) "I'm having female problems." (works for guys, too) 

2) "I think I'm having a flashback, 'cause there's this ugly demon sitting 
    at my desk, and I'm scared.  Can I go to the Substance Abuse Counselor?" 

3) "I just got through 'talking' to my girlfriend, and now I've got blue 
    balls, can I go to the bathroom to (ahem) fix this?" 

4) "Can I go to my counselor to see about changing classes?  The chick who 
   sits in front of me is giving me wood, and I'm much too well hung for it 
   to go un-noticed." 

5) "Can I go to the bathroom?  I forgot to wipe..." 

6) "I just smoked a fat blunt, can I go to the nurse for eye drops?" 

7) "I just smoked a gram of crack, GIMME A PASS, BITCH!" 

8) "I need to go ask my health teacher where I can purchase extra-large 
   condoms at.." 

9) "I need to go ask my health teacher where I can purchase petite condoms 
   at.." 

10) Put your hand over your mouth, inflate your cheeks, and run out of class 
    like you're gonna spew.  Don't forget gagging noises.  Go back to class 
    ten minutes later, apologize, and ask for a pass to the nurse. 

If all else fails, play the race card: 

"You won't gimme a pass because I'm (fill in ethnic backgroud here)!  I'm 
 gonna sue!" 

raven(69) <raven96@hic.net> 
                                  
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