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Humdrum Issue 01
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issue number one
"bringing you the very second of its kind"
released on december twenty-five, nineteen ninety-six
e-mail; humdrum@juno.com
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humdrum (hum'drum') adj. lacking variety; dull; monotonous; boring
i chuckled to myself when i first saw the word printed neatly in my
dictionary. "ahhh yes. humdrum will prove to be an excellent name for this
zine."
audacity, my faithful side kick, looked at the name and scratched his
forehead. "so how did you figure out what to name the zine?"
"luck." i exclaimed. "i just closed my eyes, opened the dictionary, and
pointed my finger at a completely random page in the book."
he looked confused. "but why use the name humdrum?"
i had no idea why i picked humdrum. my only explanation was that it
'just sounded neat.' but i couldn't let audacity find out i was clue less to
the situation. he believed in me.
"i have my reasons." i said, trying to hide the fact that i had no idea
what i was talking about.
audacity had become extremely annoyed. "if you don't want to tell me why
you named it humdrum, then fine. but what about all the readers? i'm sure
they'd like to know why."
i began to sweat. he noticed the watery beads trickle down my face.
"ohhhhhhh. you haven't forgotten about the readers, have you?"
my mind froze with fear. the readers. in all my busyness and preparation
to get this issue done, i had completely overlooked the most important factor.
"uhhhhh, no, of course not." i tried to smile.
audacity's face had filled with terror. "what are we gunna do now?" he
screamed. "we don't even know why this zine is named humdrum!"
i paused for a moment and took a careful look at the situation. why are
side kicks valuable? what are they used for? a light bulb lit in my head. of
course, i'll just throw him an idea and he'll say something witty, eventually
leading to the solution of our dilemma.
"we'll write stories and poetry." i looked at audacity as if waiting for
a classic response.
"oh, what a brilliant idea. it's not like that has ever been done
before."
by then the irony of the situation had climaxed. even this introduction
was a cliche. audacity had just laid a foundation to build upon. humdrum, on
the outside, looks like the average zine. but on the inside it has a deeper
meaning, one that holds truth and thought. it has the courage to examine
society and the scene. besides, the name has a nice sound to it. =]
i was ecstatic. "thanks 'lil buddy. heyuck."
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let me introduce myself
by pisces aquarius
hi, my name is pisces aquarius and i am a zineoholic. all my troubles
started when a friend of mine gave me a k-r4d zine named hxxdxxm (censored to
keep the innocent innocent). naturally i was bedazzled beyond belief at the
zine's contents and eventually found myself spending ungodly amounts of time
reading it.
at first i only read when i was on the can. then i started reading before
school, after school, and even during school. i had become so obsessed with
the zine i recorded it to tape and played it while i was asleep.
my parents were the first to notice my unusual behavior. i had become
distant and rejected even the closest people in my life. all i ever thought
about was reading the zine. it became my life.
that is why i am here today... no, i'm not here to get professional help.
i'm not here to talk about my own problems either. i am here to give out free
issues of humdrum. who cares that i have no life, this zine is fun to read.
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how to contact us
by the editor
as tempting as it may sound, i do not want recognition in any scene or
group. my opinion is that if this zine is any good it does not need a list of
names or affiliations backing it up; it should carry its own weight. also,
since elite is only a state of mind rather than actually being a state of
physical ability, i protest against anyone who does not allow the distribution
of this zine to the general populace. this is not an underground zine, all
are free to read humdrum.
humdrum will accept articles, poems, or even comments. to submit your own
work to be placed in an upcoming issue, send it to:
humdrum humdrum@juno.com (mail here first or else)
leave all feedback at:
pisces aquarius pisces.aquarius@juno.com (that would be me)
audacity audacity@juno.com (coffee boy / side kick)
oh yeah, one more thing, juno deserves some recognition. juno is fun,
easy to use, and free. it is even a way to make money at school or work. just
make about 50 accounts and then sell them off to suckers. you'd be surprised
how many people think they are getting a bargain.
if you would like a juno account mail me $5 with a self addressed stamped
envelope. expect a 2-3 week waiting period for delivery. satisfaction is not
guaranteed.
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the same old thing, what humdrum is all about
by pisces aquarius
look in the mirror;
imperfection. the word torments my soul.
there is no escape; i am imperfection. no matter how hard i try there
will always be someone who does not agree with what i do, there will always be
someone who disagrees with my point of view. i will be categorized and labeled
so that others can follow. i will be like someone else. i am imperfect.
i am a victim of my own judgement.
we are like words. words are independent; each carries its own thought or
has its own meaning. like words, together we are strong, we are capable, we
are a society. i am a word. i am an individual. i am humdrum.
humdrum.
we must all follow a pattern in life set by our peers. we live and then
we die. we spend our lives dreaming of something new, something delicious, and
something fun. then when we finally grant our own wishes, we become bored with
our new pleasures and begin to look for something else.
read on.
i cannot tell you what will happen next. you must read to know; you must
look carefully to understand. your perspective will be totally different than
mine. what you think i believe will be what you believe. that is important.
that is what life is all about. that is variety.
what is this about?
i did not want to start this zine's issue as number one. that is boring.
everyone who has ever put out a zine has done that. but i had no choice. i had
to. it's in the rule book created by implication. everything about a zine is
boring, even the name. some editors "borrow" ideas or stories from other zines
and even cut and paste. this zine is not like that. humdrum is the same old
thing, yes, but with a different twist.
humdrum will focus on the boring, the dull, and the monotonous. and at
the same time offer variety, enjoyment, and uniqueness. i found the same old
thing too boring; i want challenge. i enjoy writing poetry. i enjoy looking at
life from different angles and point of views. i enjoy writing so that people
will be entertained. you read ideas in a zine and say, "gee, now isn't that
interesting. i never thought of looking at it in that way." beware of the zine
name though, it is only there to express my opinion on the world and not
necessarily condemn this zine.
is humdrum the same old thing? let perspective be the judge of that.
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withdrawn expectations
by pisces aquarius
this is a short poem that i wrote after watching a few of my friends
throw their life away for a temporary buzz. i'm not exactly against drug use;
i just feel that drugs, like other addicting things, can ruin a person's life.
this is also a poem taken out of the book i am putting together. it will
be released shortly so look for it on your local #zero_day channels.
withdrawn expectations
throw the silver spoon back into the mouth of need 1
he just wanted a simple life of nowhere dreams
late night smoke out reflected by the street light 3
go on, your mother wants you home tonight
he was a run away, he was a king of bums 5
he sold his soul away and bought the devil's fun 6
the bastard youth forgot why mary was a saint 7
too late, more hate, he watched his parent's heart break
for no hope
he said he would return, he said he loved his dad 10
he watched the sun set behind his dirty hands
don't leave them now, don't leave their kiss too late 12
the one more chance is why he couldn't wait 13
line by line explanation
1 the only love that his parents gave him was in the form of material
possession.
3 drugs became his only escape.
5 he ran from his parents expectations.
6 the devil's symbolism is used to unveil the hidden truth behind drugs.
7 he saw the world as loneliness and sorrow.
10 allusion to the parable 'the prodigal son.'
12 his parents offered him one more chance to come home.
13 after seeing the world, he finally realized that he had rejected the most
important thing, his parents. he couldn't handle going back to his parent's
"one more chance" and killed himself.
[that was deep man... brought a tear to muh eye. -audacity]
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empty fulfillments
by audacity
empty fulfillments is a poem that examines the question of eternal
salvation. God, the almighty, is the judge of humanity; the question arises:
who will be accepted into heaven, and who will be sent to hell?
empty fulfillments
we strive to be the best
for what no one knows
to live a better life?
i don't think so
we try to be good
we try to be fair
we try to be honest
but does He really care?
will He except me for who i am
did i make the right choices for this life
will He let me stay away from this world
or will He put me back for another fight
[that's pretty good for your first poem. -pisces aquarius]
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there you have it. thanks for checking out humdrum issue #1. look for the
next issue soon. this is my first attempt at leaving a mark in the scene. i'd
appreciate any comments or suggestions you might have so i can make something
good out of 'the boring.'
you know what? i think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
-pisces aquarius
