Copy Link
Add to Bookmark
Report
Greeny World Domination 063
GwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwD
T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e ,
I n c o r p o r a t e d
Presents:
__ __ 666 333333333
_____ ____ _| |__| |_ 666 33 333
// | \ |_ __ _| 666 333
|| ____ | || | | | | | 6666666666 333
|| || \ / | || | _| |__| |_ 6666 6666 333
\\___// \/\/ |____/ |_ __ _| 666 666 333
|__| |__| 6666 6666 33 333
666666666 333333333
"Untitled?" by Lobo Licious
----- GwD: The American Dream with a Twist -- of Lime ***** Issue #63 -----
----- release date: 11-26-98 ------
Once, I fell and broke my wrist while rollerblading. I bet I looked like the
Tacoma Narrows Bridge, all wiggly and shit before I fell. Which reminds me:
I'm an engineering major. We rock. Math and science rule, man. Once, in
my trig class, I hit my head on the desk. It fucking hurt. Zach laughed. He
and I became friends the next year in calculus. We played chess sometimes. My
dad taught me to play chess when I was five years old. I still suck. We also
played this dot game. I have an aunt named "Dot." She's cool. Once, a mall
Santa Claus called her "big-un," or so she thought (he was actually talking to
this little kid who was nearby...my aunt glared at him, and he said it again,
making sure to point out that the kid was who he was talking to). Her husband's
name is "Bob." He used to be a Drill Instructor in the Marine Corps. He made
some guy stay on his knees for two hours once. I want someone to get on their
knees. When you pray, you get on your knees. Genuflect, I believe it's called.
I don't remember the last time I prayed and meant it. I went to church on
Easter. I also went to the Easter Bash. I drank. I like alcohol. I've only
driven drunk once. I used to date a girl who's mother was killed by a drunk
driver. They need to burn in hell. Even though I don't believe in it. I like
my car. I miss my old one, though. It had character. I have character, but I
don't have a spine. Or at least I have no backbone. This girl I used to work
with broke a vertebra when she jumped out of a two story building because she
was running from the cops. I miss that job, even though I technically still
have it. It's a vortex, man. YOU CAN'T GET OUT. It's like a bad relationship,
or a left-exit-having highway in a big city, like Dallas. I have friends in
Dallas. I miss them. Zen's really tall. Taller than lots of pro-basketball
players. I wish I could play b-ball worth a shit. Everyone shits. Snotty
pointed that out to me. Snotty's my pal. She's not coming home this summer.
Not for very long, anyway. I'll have to go to Houston to see her. I knew this
guy who called Houston the world's largest suburb. I used to live in a suburb.
We ate at "Noble Roman's Pizza" all the time. It's good, but it doesn't begin
to compare to "One Guy From Italy." The suburb was called Manchester. There
was this kid that lived in the apartment upstairs from us. He didn't seem to
know his own name. His mother called him something different than what his
father called him. He was younger than me. I was in third grade. I think his
parents beat him. When Bruno and I bought our Philmont belts, we jokingly told
the people at the store that they were "good for child-beating." They believed
us, and they were scared. I felt sorry for that kid. Bruno, Bill Hooper, and I
are supposed to eat lunch at "One Guy's" tomorrow. I invited my girlfriend too,
but I don't know if she will show up - I left a message on her answering machine
about it, but she may not get it in time. Besides, who would want to hang
around a bunch of geeks like us? I like answering machines. Mine is some
program that came with my computer. My old one had stickers all over it. So
does the case for my bass. Bob the Master of the World had better still have
that bass, or I will kill him, Spaniard that he is. I've known him for six or
seven years, and he's never had a haircut besides a buzz. I usually only drink
until I have a buzz. I have what Zippy liked to call "big hair." I've never
figured out what that means, though. Kind of like how I don't understand the
complexities of the research my dad does or the reason that anyone really likes
"the Cure." Bob tMotW and I argue about music all the time, but we agree that
"the Cure" is pretty crappy. Zippy used to listen to off-beat music, like "Ed
Hall" and "Superchunk." He probably still does. He got married last weekend.
Ratt Fink, Diamondback, m0m, Zach D., Sugar, Rasputin, and I sat together at the
reception. It was a geekfest. Hopefully, GwadFest98 will be MORE THAN a
geekfest, not that geekfests are less-than-cool or anything like that. The
old-school GwD monthly gatherings were naught but geekfests. At one of them,
STM shot Sir Flea with a BB gun. Another time, BtMotW spent the whole night
running from fastjack, who wanted to kill him. fj still wants to kill him, and
that shit went down 4 years ago or more. I've never killed anyone. My boss
claims that he has, and I'm not sure if he's lying or not. He's one of those
guys that's always cynical and sarcastic and you can never tell if he's joking
or lying or not. I didn't find out until after we broke up, but my
ex-girlfriend lied to me, and fairly often, I would guess. I took her to my
senior prom. We ate at "Gabriel's," which is where the girl I'm dating now
worked until Sunday when the owner decided to close the place without telling
anyone beforehand. That's kinda shitty. I mean, it's not burn-your-house-down,
kill-your-dog, sleep-with-your-wife shitty, but it's pretty shitty nonetheless.
I'm glad I don't work at a restaurant. Cleaning up other people's messes sucks
ass. One time, some customer shat all over the wall in one of the stalls of the
women's restroom where I work. I had never been so glad that I was a male in my
life. A dr00gan female who also happened to work there (and who shall remain
nameless to avoid undue embarrassment to her) had to clean it up. Personally, I
wouldn't have done it - I would have walked then and there, if they'd asked me
to clean it up. I like walking. It's good for the soul, if you believe in that
sort of thing. I don't know what I believe in anymore, not that I'm sure I ever
really did. I believe in friends. I believe in love. I believe in hate. I
believe in being all you can be. But I'm not going to join the army. It's just
not my cup of tea. Tea sure is good, though. Earl grey, like Captain Picard
drank. Or even "Lipton Brisk Iced Tea." Y'know, the one with those claymation
commercials? Claymation is cool. Whatever happened to the "California
Raisins?" Those raisins brought about my first hearing of Marvin Gaye. Simply
put, the man was a genius. Like Beethoven. Or Mozart. Or Lennon. Or Marley.
Or Dali. Or Van Gogh. When I went to France, I saw this really cool Dali
exhibit with a bunch of statues and stuff. I didn't see any of his art, but I
saw the sanitorium where Van Gogh cut off his ear and the cafe from his painting
"Cafe a Nuit." It was an expensive cafe, so we didn't eat there. I'm cheap. I
tell my girlfriend that all the time, and she makes fun of me for it. I suppose
I deserve it. But hey, it's not my fault I get things for free when I'm around
her. Right? I like free stuff. 99% or so of the time, free stuff is better
than stuff you have to pay for. Basically, free stuff is where it's at. Kind
of like the Honors Frat, despite it's officership. And membership. And any
other -ship you can think of. If I wanted to be in a service organization, I'd
be in APO. I was a Boy Scout, after all. So was Bruno. We used to sing in
French on camping trips to scare everyone else so they wouldn't butt-rape us.
Or something like that. Wait, no child molestation ever happened in our scout
troop (that we know of). After they made us watch that video about how
molestation was bad, Bruno and I *did* chase these little kids around asking
them if they wanted to wrestle because the older-boy/molester in the video liked
to wrestle naked with his victims. We were joking though. The Ol' Dirty Croat
may be a lot of things (like old and dirty), but he sure as hell isn't a
pedophile. And neither am I, despite what you may have heard. We had some fun
times in Scouts. Arlo and I used to be on an OA Ceremonies Team together. Rory
was on the other team. What's the OA? I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill
you. Simply put, the OA has used the "WWW" abbreviation since long before it
was chic to use it (though the OA's "WWW" stands for something completely
different from everyone else's). Not that the common man's "WWW" is a bad
thing. I mean, hey, free porn. We all know that's what the Internet is for.
So quit reading this lame-ass text file and go download some porn. NOW.
What was the point of this? I don't know. If you don't like it, that's just
too fucking bad.
Leave me alone.
-----------------------------<GwD Command Centers>------------------------------
GwDweb: http://www.GREENY.org/
http://gwd.snakeden.org/
GwD Publications: http://www.geocities.com/Athens/2334/
ftp://ftp.GREENY.org/gwd/
ftp://gwd.snakeden.org/gwd/
ftp://ftp.dto.net/pub/dto/zines/gwd/
ftp://ftp.etext.org/pub/Zines/Greeny/
GwD BBSes: C.H.A.O.S. - http://chaos.GREENY.org/
http://solice.iglobal.net/chaos/
The Snake's Den - http://www.snakeden.org/
telnet://bbs.snakeden.org
dial-in: (806)793-3779
E-Mail: gwd@GREENY.org
* GwD, Inc. - P.O. Box 16038 - Lubbock, Texas 79490 *
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"This son of a bitch here is not only a player, he's a definite bad influence
and is capable of inciting many riots, your honor. He's a goddamn
revolutionary." - The Lawyer-guy in the court skit-thing
on Wyclef Jean's album (_The Carnival_)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-+- F Y M -+-
GR33NY LIK3S mash3d p0tat03s
MORE THAN FIVE YEARS of ABSOLUTE CRAP! /---------------\
copyright (c) MCMXCVIII Lobo Licious/GwD Publications :FIGHT THE POWER:
copyright (c) MCMXCVIII GwD, Inc. : GwD :
All rights reserved \---------------/
GwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwD63
