Copy Link
Add to Bookmark
Report
Greeny World Domination 053
GwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwD
T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e ,
I n c o r p o r a t e d
Presents:
__ __ 55555555555 333333333
_____ ____ _| |__| |_ 55 33 333
// | \ |_ __ _| 55 333
|| ____ | || | | | | | 5555555555 333
|| || \ / | || | _| |__| |_ 555 333
\\___// \/\/ |____/ |_ __ _| 555 333
|__| |__| 55 555 33 333
555555555 333333333
"Cybersex" submitted by Bill Hooper (taken from his humor mailing list)
----- GwD: The American Dream with a Twist -- of Lime ***** Issue #53 -----
----- release date: 12-31-97 -----
For anyone that has spent just a few too many hours in #hotsex on IRC...
Online computer users often engage in what is affectionately known as
"cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into keyboards and shared through Internet
phone lines get pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see below, one of the two
cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat doesn't seem to
quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...
Starting mIRC log. Logging to #SEX.log :
Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like?
Sweetheart: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high heels. I work
out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you
look like?
Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds.I wear glasses and I have on a pair of
blue sweat pants I just bought from Walmart. I'm also wearing a T-shirt with a
few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner...it smells funny.
Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me?
Wellhung: OK
Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom.There's soft music playing on the stereo and
candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up into your eyes, smiling.
My hand works its way down to your crotch and begins to fondle your huge,
swelling bulge.
Wellhung: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Wellhung: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse.My hands are trembling.
Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly.
Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk slides off my
warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and rubbing.
Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a hole in
your blouse. I'm sorry.
Sweetheart: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Wellhung: I'll pay for it.
Sweetheart: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black bra. My soft breasts
are rising and falling, as I breathe harder and harder.
Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's stuck. Do you
have any scissors?
Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly. I'm reaching back undoing the
clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses my breasts. My nipples are
erect for you.
Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting the clasp.
Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel your tongue all
over me.
Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, breasts. They're
neat!
Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm nibbling your ear.
Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and phlegm.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really.
Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the remains of my blouse.
Wellhung: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a plop.
Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing your hard tool.
Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties.
Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in and out
nibbling on you...umm...wait a minute.
Sweetheart: What's the matter?
Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking.
Sweetheart: Are you OK?
Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red.
Sweetheart: Can I help?
Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling through the
cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover.
Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now.
Sweetheart: I'm on the bed arching for you.
Wellhung: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet. And now
I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost. Where's the bedroom?
Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Wellhung: I found it.
Sweetheart: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you so badly.
Wellhung: Me too.
Sweetheart: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately-our naked bodies
pressing each other.
Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
Sweetheart Why don't you take off your glasses?
Wellhung: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the glasses on the
night table.
Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room and toward
the bathroom.
Sweetheart: Hurry back, lover.
Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the toilet.
I lift the lid.
Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but I can't
find it. Uh-oh!
Sweetheart: What's the matter now?
Wellhung: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry again.
I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
Sweetheart: Mmm, yes. Come on.
Wellhung: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know...thing...in
your...you know...woman's thing.
Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it!
Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your neck.
Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't stand it another
second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Wellhung: I'm flaccid.
Sweetheart: What?
Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous look on my face.
Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner all floppy. I'm
going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
Sweetheart: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on my underwear.
Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Wellhung: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table. I'm
feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray, picture frames and
your candles.
Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my shoes.
Wellhung: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of your
candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing at it, a
shocked look on my face.
Sweetheart: Go to hell. I'm logging off, you loser!
Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh noooo!
Sweetheart: <logged off>
-----------------------------<GwD Command Centers>------------------------------
www =-= http://www.geocities.com/Athens/2334/index.html (The GwD WebSite)
http://solice.iglobal.net/chaos/ (Chaos, the Web-BBS)
http://www.snakeden.org/ (The Snake's Den)
ftp -=- ftp.etext.org /pub/Zines/Greeny/
telnet =-= snakeden.org
e-mail -=- gwd@geocities.com (Subj: subscribe GwD)
BBS =-= The Snake's Den - (806)793-3779 -- damn right it's still dial-in
* GwD, Inc. - P.O. Box 16038 - Lubbock, Texas 79490 *
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<GwD Command Centers>------------------------------
"Gimme some sugar, Baby." - Ash, _Army of Darkness_
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
-+- F Y M -+-
GR33NY LIK3S mash3d p0tat03s
/---------------\
GwD.....Back and in Full Effect, G. :FIGHT THE POWER:
GwD Task Force copyright (c) MCMXCIII by Lobo Licious : GwD :
Word is Born. \---------------/
GwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwDGwD53
