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Going Ape Shit Press 029
going ape shit press #29 by john doe and johnette doe
this is a letter from 2 of my friends to me... i'm not going to
explain it, for it would destroy the humor... enjoy...
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heya,
how u doin ...ummm i have to tell u ...<u may be mad>..if u would
have came over my house today u could have had some nice trips...n i
just came home here joe want a trip...he is just like all sorts o fucked
up now it is like 12:00 i had a hit a like 5:30 n i just like came down
from that hit they r the best hits u can ever have...i must say <joe sed
this> he saw alot o colors without u...and ummm he is tryin to get
starcontroll to work fer like 5 minuiotes now he cant fid the joystick n
i doubt he even knows where to put it...then after all that he just xed
out after he got it to work....he is bein really annoyin now...he is
like tellin me ....no he is ordering me to get him iced tea...NOW...and
to bring the whole pitcher out and well drink all the iced tea we wont
even leave any powder...these are like quotes ghe never takles like this
he is like fuckin beggin me fer iced tea now he is annoying he wants me
to tell u stuff about frogs...he was like lookin at acid warp...hes like
talkin i am not even listining....hes talkin.melissa i have to be
serious this is blue right...it is just a plain blue screen....ghe just
keeps ramblin on....i guess this is what i sopund like to the untrippin
ppl cuz i am not really trippin n he is trippin ballz....i just thoufght
u would want to know....because this is just soooooo...hes sed sumpin
bout editin toast...he is typin n talkin...n that is all he is doin he
just thinks hes talkin to me...i am not even listin to me....he is askin
me to get word wrap on fer him...i dont even know wtf it is...ghe is
just like crackin up
letter #2 (about 30 mins later)
he is gonna type shit all night like talkuin to himself ...here exact
quotes " <o i got wordwrap on fer him> he writes "now that i have
wordwrap i can woah....this is vision i just got...i mean i am going to
sit here all fuckin night and hope to hell there is no i mean no way we
are going to loose this now...melissa can see everything i have typed b4
but i an just see the present...if that makes any sence......did i say
that....well now lets talk about alfheim...WAIT....WAIT...LETS GET THIS
STRAIGHT....joe ...when u read this...well alfheim..i love alfheim....i
am just trying to type stufff so melissa thinks i am nuts....she will
type anything i type sooo...we can take this long battle all night...i
t is not going to stop...what is she goin to make u e-mail all
night...well i can go on alot longerthen she can...o yeah i was sposta
be typing....why did my lazy asss want to stop...shez just crazy right
now...SHES NOT GOINING TO STOP...so if u think....HOLY! GREEN...hug a
fuckin tree....no i an go longer thewn she thinks....NO...i am going to
go inside of the oak tree and then...i know that was....o typing i never
wanted to stop....well lets start talkin about anit strings...i love
em...they fuckin love me...i am going to want to preserve this i love
oaks...OAKS.....yea they r part of me...i can eat fuckin cake with green
oak sprokles....faires yes they eat lots of pop tarts...i REALLY NO THIS
IS A GAME NOW.....i am gettin concious????i sure hope not...well
oaks..<more on the next page>
(letter #3)
a sure hope not.....OAKS....i dedicatesd my intire life to alfheim....i
mean i would die for those little beeeny tincle pplall those fairy
folkjust dancing in the spring...fairy fairy fairy mists....all
sprinkling in me...well whaterver i give up i cant type no more he beat
i will just U/L it into yer mail l8er...it is real funny...i have tosave
ut....joes firts hit awwwwwww...how sweet...N HE STILL FUCKIN TALKS
ABOUT ALFHEIM....WELL L8ER
-Metal Chick....
cyber geeks
(letter #4)
Hah...and you though nick's love juice thing was nifty....you'll like
all of this neato stuff.....uh....llets start with the oak
tree...YES.....if i was in a magical forest with all these sprakle men
jumping aimlesly aroung faires who eat toadstools at night and green
comfronting goblins eating dewdrops all night....while oak trees
gallore...yes...i am in a lovely nice oak forest.....ah...the pleasant
flavor that the various dyrads singing would bring...oh...what magical
gouls that would yes haunt those forests at night...yes...alfheim can
quite be a freaky place at night......when all is dark...and the
toadstools have went into hiding....the shodowelves dance to the tales
which they sing....i will tell you what they are up to....this is how
the shadowelves see it..not I, but the shodowelves....it is
night....dark vast oaks....and the shadowelves dance around
fires....they tell of what they know alfheim will become, and
yes....they know what alfheim has in store! But wait!!! wait!! an
alfheim avenger prevails amongst all of them....with many great
battles....he knows what life still is all about...while he knows that
while he is in alfheim..he can dance to the spragles which all faeries
can give him.....and the forest will tell....all that's been
hiding...while all of life's nature is dying.......and yet...we let
it....but that is why it is up to you and me to stop all this madness!
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i won't tell you waht their names are, just to protect the not so
innocent, but i thought everyone would enjoy seeing this sillyness...
pure sillyness...
