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Greeny World Domination 035
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T h e G R E E N Y w o r l d D o m i n a t i o n T a s k F o r c e
Presents:
"Literary Publications by S & S"
by Seth Sometimes and Lasher
*** This file is the combination of an article by Seth and an editorial by ***
*** Lasher. They were originally printed in the Lubbock High newspaper. ***
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Overpopulation besieges us, our country over floweth. No less in the halls
of ye olde Lubbock High, idle students mill in the halls causing congestion and
curses.
How many times have you been stuck in the second floor hall behind the
mindless moron who, for no apparent reason turns and proceeds to yell to his
friend in theater, first floor? What goes through your mind as your vital and
shortened passing period passes by and you are stuck behind Mr. Ranting-Boy, or
even worse, stuck behind the guy who is stuck behind the guy who is stuck behind
the guy behind Mr. Ranting-Boy? What about when you have just enough time to
speed-walk to your class, and suddenly the 6th year senior in front of you
decides he's had too hard of a day and he needs to take a nap, right there, in
the middle of the hall. When these things happen, what goes through your mind?
Hatred? Death? Naughty Words? Suicide? Well, maybe that's just me, but no
student may say that he has not had to deal with this each and every day.
This year LHS has the great honor of hosting its largest sophomore class
ever, over 800 fresh out Jr. High neophytes to help clog up the halls with
sounds and bodies. Yes, sophomore pinball has always been a great way to
relieve the stress of the day, but with a shortened passing period and over 800
sophomores, there just isn't time enough for you and your sophball to get to
class. Besides, this is school, and 800 sophballs is exceeding the allotment of
"fun" that you are allowed to have, so you not only get a lunch detention, but
you also get an "enjoying themselves, just too much" citation.
Of course, the sophomores aren't the entire problem, the bulk of the crowds
in the halls are created by those with ever-so-much care about their student
career. I know sometimes, you just have to stop and talk to Bob, or walk about
2 feet a minute and stare at your shoes, but face it, you can only talk to Bob
so much, and those worn old converse just aren't that interesting.
Then there are those who can't pass any acquaintance in the hall without the
thought going through their mind "Gee, they didn't say anything, so they must
not have seen me, I better go make them notice me", these accursed individuals
then proceed to plow through everyone behind them, causing great havoc, hatred
and generally bad mind sets.
None are so bad as the ones who prefer not to go to class and instead feel
the need to choose the busiest spot possible, mainly in hall intersections, and
discuss the meaning of life, or something equally as important, gossip. These
socialites are the very bane of any hall walker's existence.
Our stairs are just unthinkable to even attempt to use with the popular guys
who simply must wait betwixt floors for their friend Fred who has their Algebra
II homework. I've seen cows with less body mass than these. Fred is dead, get
moving.
Then there are those who just can't stand to sit idle for any, no matter how
meager, amount of time. Ah, you finally make it to class, quick drop your books
and run into the hall to mill around! Can't be in class a second more than we
have to 'eh?
You're all beautiful people, but I don't want to touch you. Clear the
halls.
-Seth Sometimes
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School is typically portrayed as a non fun, rather boring, unexceptionally
monotonous learning experience. With something to keep the students
entertained, like a dog or elephant, school would most likely improve a bit.
Allowing pets in school would be one of the most wonderful things that ever
happened here, and besides some people get lonely around lunchtime, and need
some company.
There are a few negative aspects to having pets in school, like the strange
50 ft chickens running rampant from the biology lab. There would be a few gang
fights between vicious animals like wolverines and badgers. And there would be
more tardies issued, because of pets walking their students.
The good sides of having pets in school greatly outweigh the bad sides.
Pets would help students stay sane in school, and they look pretty also. For
instance those people who have no friends at school would finally have someone
or something to accompany them. There would be all kinds of new food in the
cafeteria like "Broiled Bunny Rabbit" or "Fido Pat." Also, the money we will
be making off the vending machines for pet food and snacks will raise the school
budget.
There would be no littering in class, for some student would have an animal
that eats anything and everything that even pretends to move. Students that
sleep in class could have a pillow, or for the student that can never get
comfortable, a foot rest.
You could easily load all your books onto a pack mule . . . you could even
load your self onto the mule! It would eliminate many parking problems, because
students would ride their pets to school. Finally, we would better educate our
pets, so that one day they might be world leaders.
The issue of pets in school is viewed as a wonderful idea. In a poll, two
out of three Seths agree that pets on campus should be considered by the school
board for the 1995 school year. Think of all the good times you and your pet
have had together at home, and think of all the good times you and your pet will
have at school.
-Lasher
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/-----------------------***** GwD Propagandists *****--------------------------\
| Lobo - Seth Sometimes - The Lizard King - Spanky McDougal, Sir! - Sir Flea |
| Zippy - Aracnia - Zen - Trojan-Man - fastjack - Diamondback - Bill Hooper |
| Lasher |
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------/
------------------------------[GwD Command Centers]-----------------------------
Chaos (806)797-7501 | Brazen's Hell (301)776-8259
GridPoint Durant (405)920-1347 | Pirate's Cove (806)795-4926
Federation Slayers' (806)798-8168 | The Anti BBS (806)763-3549
The Snake's Den (806)793-3779 | PCI (806)792-3302
The Siege Perilous (806)762-0948 | The Sprawl (806)797-0820
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copyright (c) 1994 by Seth Sometimes and Lasher of GwD Inc. :FIGHT THE POWER:
GREENY world Domination Task Force copyright (c) 1993 by Lobo: GwD :
All rights reserved \---------------/
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