Fucked Up College Kids File 337

eZine lover (@eZine)

Published in 

Fucked Up College Kids

 · 26 Apr 2019

  

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=   F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K.   = 
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                    the rose and the bloodgarden 
                    ---------------------------- 

	i often think of myself as a rose, especially 
	when my inner companions sing their sweet hell 
	music softly within the white tissues of my 
	mind. a rose is pure perfection mottled by 
	wicked thorns that jab the tender places. this 
	is what i do. this is who i am. 

			[ 2 of me. & they weep. ] 

	i hurt the ones i love. i have two halves. one 
	is loving, passionate, generous. she is known 
	by her own name, and those who love her are 
	fools. the other side is heartless and cruel. 
	she has no name, but she is in control. bloody 
	words escape from the cage in her mind, and 
	they cut others without mercy. 

			[ white & blood dripping. ] 

	i know others like me. i smile tenderly at 
	them when they describe their inner agony. 
	i offer words of comfort, though the advice 
	i give is hollow. once i received the same 
	advice. ( it will pass, things get better, 
	life is too wonderful to pass up. ) i hated 
	the givers. theirs were lives of beauty and 
	normality. no demons spoke to them of their 
	dreams. no images of violence and hatred 
	disturbed their thoughts. only sweet solace. 
	i wanted to kill them for it. 

			[ 2 roads & i took.. ] 

	i used to find meaning in the words of the 
	great poets. one could say that i am a 
	successful young woman carving her place in 
	a man's world. those who know me are amazed 
	that i am alive. neither understands me. 
	it is just as well. insanity cannot be 
	understood by the sane. tell me, would you 
	dance with the devil if your own choosing? 

			[ bloodgarden ] 

	i live in a bloodgarden, where i can 
	appreciate the beauty of the rose, but i 
	cannot keep myself from pricking my skin 
	on the thorns. for i find more joy in the 
	pain than in the purity. perhaps you are 
	reading these words and cannot understand 
	them. be grateful if this is so. i would be. 

	[ scribbling, bibbling, bibbling, scribbling.. ] 

			mozart - amadeus 

 
	Palpable Obscure 

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