Demented Anarchists and Malicious Malignant Inventors of Terror Issue 3

eZine lover (@eZine)

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Demented Anarchists and Malici

 · 5 years ago

  

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º       Demented Anarchists & Malicious Malignant Inventors of Terror        º 
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                    Issue #3 - 501 Things I Hate - 1/3 

                         By: Sir Robin and Madcap 

Well, Kiddies, This is 501 things I Hate - Part one: 1 Thru 167... 

 
1. Politicians 
2. Cracked Cassette Tape Cases 
3. Flat Sodas 
4. Reruns 
5. CBS Morning News 
6. ABC, for cancelling The Dennis Miller Show 
7. Willard Scott 
8. Johnny Carson 
9. The Ten O-Clock News 
10. Pink 
11. Holes in the Road 
12. Cheap Stereos 
13. Paper Cuts 
14. Old Security Guards 
15. Prodigy 
16. Classical Music that's Boring 
17. Burnt out Lights 
18. Assholes 
19. Dirty Asses 
20. Cheap Movies 
21. Road Construction 
22. Dead Skunks 
23. Bees 
24. Ants 
25. Wiggers 
26. Nerds 
27. Ben Foder???? (Madcap, who the HELL is Ben Foder?) 
28. People who are Too Crazy (I hate myself!) 
29. Normal People 
30. Sewers 
31. J.A.P.s (Jewish American Princes/Princesses) 
32. Bitches (On second thought...) 
33. Salt Water 
34. Soft Core Rap 
35. Country Music 
36. Top 40 Music 
37. VH-1 
38. That stupid MTV logo that appears during videos 
39. That Stupid VH-1 Logo 
40. Gotta Have it Cards 
41. Old People who fart loudly 
42. Smelling 
43. People who tell bad Star Trek jokes 
44. Shit 
45. The Energizer Bunny 
46. Uruguay 
47. Computer Manuals 
48. Printers that mess Up 
49. OS/2 
50. Bombs that don't blow up 
51. People that JUST WON'T DIE! 
52. Iraq 
53. George Michael 
54. Construction Sites 
55. Butt Cracks 
56. Chick that are not Anarchists (Hey, That was Madcap's idea) 
57. c00l DoODz WHo THinK ThEY'Re RaD! 
58. Lamers 
59. Anti-IRA People (MadCap Again, What a Crazy Fucker) 
60. My Spleen 
61. KY-Jelly (Too Slippery... JUST KIDDING) 
62. KFC 
63. Kriss Kross... That makes me Sick! Sick! 
64. People who point out EVERY LITTLE GODDAM MISTAKE! 
65. Stupid People 
66. Hostages 
67. Dictators 
68. Senators 
69. Ma Bell 
70. Congressmen 
71. Edison Companies 
72. Taco Bell Commercials 
73. Little Richard 
74. Pocket Calculators 
75. Commadores 
76. People who DON'T GET THE FUCKING FACT THAT ELVIS IS DEAD! 
77. People who hate V.a.S. 
78. TrackBalls 
79. Wally Ball 
80. Racquet Ball 
81. Golf Pants 
82. Divots 
83. Dick Tracy 
84. Madonna (SLUT SLUT!.. Well, actually....) 
85. Cauliflower 
86. Icky Tasting Stuff 
87. Stew 
88. Wankle Rotary Engines 
89. Cheap School Stuff 
90. Waking Up 
91. Fake Dew 
92. Gas Station Bathrooms 
93. Kewl Spelled Correctly 
94. D.C. Comics 
95. Washington D.C. 
96. McDonalds 
97. Fonts 
98. Reader's Digest 
99. BandSaws 
100. Flits 
101. Phonies 
102. Mistakes 
103. Library Fines 
104. 2400 Baud 
105. Easy Listing Music 
106. Beer Commercials 
107. Neil Diamond 
108. Nuns 
109. Marky Mark 
110. Folk Singers 
111. New Kids on the (Chopping) Block 
112. Michael Bolton 
113. Remakes of Old Songs 
114. Michael Jackson 
115. The Ambassador Bridges 
116. Toll Booths 
117. Highways 
118. Cops 
119. Clowns 
120. Mimes 
121. Flat Chested Women 
122. Over-Protective Mothers 
123. Keys 
124. Locked Doors 
125. Motels 
126. Chips (Ya know, the show?) 
127. Kids Day  
128. CGA Monitors 
129. Notepads 
130. TV Wrestling 
131. Broken Tendons 
132. Hernias 
133. Tax Men 
134. Japanese Cars 
135. Jimmy Hoffa 
136. Jeep Wrangler Commercials 
137. Sir Mix-A-Lot's Version of the awesome Song "Iron Man"... 
138. People 
139. School Dances 
140. En Vouge 
141. Hammer 
142. Dennis Rodman, for being a Quitter 
143. Indecision 
144. Gun's & Roses Concert "Performance" 
145. Tapes 
146. 8-track 
147. Records 
148. Dot Matrix Printers 
149. 5 1/4 Disks 
150. Al Sharpton 
151. Cigarettes 
152. Smokers 
153. Faults 
154. Traverse City 
155. Bear Traps 
156. Drunk Drivers 
157. Catholic Schools 
158. 60 Year old Guys TRYING to make a comeback Singing/Playing Sports 
159. The Olympic Triple-Cast 
160. Hole Punchers 
161. Disk Cases 
162. Soda Cans 
163. 7-11 
164. 7-up 
165. Pesticides 
166. Help 
167. Lame BBSes 

That concludes Part 1. Have fun, and see if our Tastes Are alike 

Let's End with a prayer 

Dear God - 

Kill Silas Sperling, Head (Giver) of the hair club 4 men. 
Also kill all evangelists... Especially Robert Tilton.... 
Amen to all that shit. 

 
                              <Sir Robin '92> 
                     "The radar sir.... It's JAMMED!" 

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