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Capital of Nasty Vol. 01 Issue 05
Capital of Nasty Electronic Magazine
Issue V, Volume I, Year MCMXCVI AD
Monday, July 15th, 1996
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1. LOVE, HATE: better late then never.
2. CoN: Back on the air.
3. Women, according to Rob W.
4. Independence Day 4: truly an American tale.
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1. I love. I hate. This was due Issue IV...
I hate when people talk about themselves all the time..
I hate it when people are so damn nosy...
I hate it when people say they'll call u back in 15 minutes then they
call u back an hour later or the next day...
I love it when i become a little she devil and nobody knows it
hehehe (evil smile)
i love it when i bugg people (in a cute way)
I love calling all my friends the ones that i met on the irc
channel (Franca, francesca which i never see her DAMN...
paolo.pasquale.. joe and last but not
least my one and only Marco the one i truly love :)))
and last but not least Leandro hehehe dot dot dot (evil smile)
Outrage @ io.org (a.k.a Maria Seccia)
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2. "On the Air..."
After the primary explosion in the computer, the vital
transistors flying in their paths, and a week of fiddling with
this darned thing, surprise suprise it's back working.. or almost.
Almost cuz now the CD-Rom is acting funny and every CD I slap in
it gives me errors here or that file there isn't reading corretly.
What a pain. But at least DOS' Edit works. I finally saw ID4,
I want to see it again. Love is a chess game, however I lost
track of my pieces. Work, more work, just work. "Do you work here?"
I was asked at the new office where I work. "Yes" I answered
"However we do not sell eggnog". Welcome to Issue Five.
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3. Women: according to Rob W., 1,11-25
It was a dark night. Well, actually not so dark.
But it was dark enough, so there. Peter and I had just returned
from the beach after looking at the weirdest moon, rising from
Lake Ontario. It had this strange red glow to it, and "ID4" was
still in our minds. Unfortunatly for us, it was really the moon
and not an alien spaceship filled with evil desire. On our way
back we stopped for something to eat at a little coffee shop,
the only place open at 4 in the morning. We sat there without
saying much for a few minutes when we suddenly heard "Guys!!"
and in comes Rob W. with his friend, Jerry A. who where at
the pub next door after a long day at work. They sat down
at our table and we all began to bitch and complain. I began
talking (more like whining) about this girl I like which seems
to be immune to all my techniques. Don't get me wrong, I am not a
Don Juan, but I'm not even a fat slob (sorry 'bout that Jumi).
"I just don't get it" I bitched and complained, and once I start
it's hard to stop me "she says one thing for weeks, then changes
her mind in one day and says something completely different!".
"Girls work just like baseball" explained a not-so-sober Rob W.
"You are the batter" and he began adjusting his hat and pretending
he was holding a bat in his hands "The girl you like" and he pointed
somewhere in front of him as if he could actually see 'her'
"She is the pitcher, holding on that ball, chewing on that gum,
grinning". Then shifting to his right as if something had
bitten him in the ass "Her best friend is the catcher! Don't
be fooled that just because she is standing next to ya, that
she is yer friend! No! She smiles at you and signals the
pitcher."
"What about the stuff she says and then suddenly, one day, she
changes opinion?" I dared to interrupt.
"I was getting there! Anyway, you are seating there, bat in
your hand waiting, and she throws a ball! Then another one!
And another one! By now you are expecting another ball, right?"
There was no use trying to figure out what he had just said and to
attempt answering him, he was already on the next sentence.
"Well you get ready, the sun is right, even the gum in your mouth
is tasting right, and she throws. And guess what? It's a curved
ball!" He chuckled a bit, we all laughed. Suddenly he raised his
arms halfway and his hands looked as if he was holding something
in front of him. "Sometimes" he went on "my girlfriend calls me and
says something so particularly absurd that I go into shock!" and as
he said that he placed the two imaginary objects he was holding,
looked at me and said "clear" and he jolted just when they try to
revive someone.
I didn't really learn anything new that night, but at least
Rob W. was able to explain in a funny way the things that
were bothering me. Don't get me wrong but in a guys' world,
girls are pretty weird. I'm sure it works the other way around as
well (wouldn't mind hearing about from some of you). I guess gays
and lesbians are afraid of the challenge that a person with their
genitals assembled differently can be, so they just stick with
what they know. Remember folks, weird doesn't necessarely mean bad.
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INDEPENDENCE DAY
Well over all I think that it was a good movie. There were a few holes
in the plot (about 15km across). Such as;
i. Will Smith tells his girl friend who is a stripper to come and
stay with him on the base. Before she can reach the base the
ships strike and start the massive fires. She dives into a
maintence shed with the dog and lives. Then she proceeds
for the base. Will Smith "borrows" a helicopter and goes
out to find her. Sure enough he does.
ii. The president of the Unites States stays in the White House?
iii. I really don't think that a "cable guy" would be the one to
save the world.
iv. True the aliens have stronger weapons but I don't think that
the kind of defeat that they managed would be possible.
In short I rather liked the movie and the special effects were great
and the sequel will most likely be an action film where aliens in
hiding come out or another race comes down or another ship comes to
find out what happened.
Same deal with Jurassic Park 2, they will go back to the island
only to reclaim it.
Rating: ********
worth the $8.50 for the effects.
Peter Sprokkelenburg
R&S Team
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I thought the movie was cool. A bit too american for my
tastes, and of course the usual victory at the end with the great
speach of the US president that seriously brought tears to my eyes.
"it's not a matter of freedom" he said "it's fighting for our right
to live, we are fighting to survive". It had sad bits, but many
happy bits as well (waving at the alien while they are in the ship
and saying "he doesn't know what's coming to him"). Not a bad movie,
and I can't wait for the sequel as well. I'm just afraid to see it
because usually sequels suck compared to the original movie. Let
us know what you thought of it.
The Canadian version of ID4 would've probably been called VD1,
for Victoria Day July 1st. However since we don't have a
President I guess our Prime Minister will have to do. The
alien will communicate through some french scientist and
there will be a complete lack of understanding between
what Chretien (our PM)will try to say and what the dead
french quebecois scientist is not really saying.
Leandro
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