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Angstmonster Special Release 05
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> ANGSTMONSTER <
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ANGSTMONSTER SPECIAL RELEASE 5
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
/\ /\ "Hey kid, "It's a | "Some guy saw all my
____| x x | what's up ninja | /\ appearances in zines
\/\[____| | with the sword" |(**) and wants me to do a
/\ /\\(OO)/ sword? t/[] public service
\__/ _/\_ announcement for him."
/\ /\ "Is it "Yeah! | "Kid, you aren't a ninja.
____| x x | about Isn't | /\ | __ | Ninja's have two arms and
\/\[____| | ninjas?" that |(**) ||öö|| you have only one arm. I
/\ /\\(OO)/ cool?" t/[] t-||-t have been sent by the order
\__/ _/\_ _/\_ of ninjas to kill you."
^in crackly robot voice
/\ /\ "WTF? "Don't | "I was
____| x x | a robot worry | /\ warned | __ | "Haha, you'll be
\/\[____| | ninja?" ..." |(**) about ||öö|| no match for me
/\ /\\(OO)/ t/[] this..." t-||-t child. Prepare to
\__/ _/\_ _/\_ die by my blade."
/\ /\ "What "Stand | "It's /\ /\
____| x x | do you back | /\ time ____| x x | "!?!?!"
\/\[____| | mean?" pig/cat |(**) for me \/\[____| |
/\ /\\(OO)/ guy..." t/[] to prove /\ /\\(OO)/
\__/ _/\_ myself..." \__/
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
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> NINJA FIGHT! <
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| "HaHa robot ninja! /\ /\ "Wow, that was some
| /\ I have defeated you ____| x x | sick ninja skills.
|(**) and thus am a true | \/\[____| | Where'd you learn to
t/[] ninja! The first _ _ | | /\ /\\(OO)/ do that?"
_/\_ of my kind!" --[öö] \/ t \__/
| "I have learned all of my /\ /\ "Well, now that you have
| /\ ninja secrets from the ____| x x | proved yourself as a ninja,
|(**) teachings of the Ninja \/\[____| | perhaps everyone will start
t/[] Strike Force. Their /\ /\\(OO)/ treating you differently..."
_/\_ teachings have shown me \__/
the way..."
| "No, cat/pig. No one can /\ /\ "But what about the robot?
| /\ know about this but you. ____| x x | What if there are more of
|(**) I am sworn to secrecy by \/\[____| | them? Our lives are in
t/[] my Strike Force brethren. /\ /\\(OO)/ danger. You must protect
_/\_ To reveal my true self puts \__/ the angstmonsters."
me in danger."
| "Yes, unknown to you or any /\ /\ "Wow. Well I guess I you
| /\ of the angstmonsters, I have ____| x x | should go do your public
|(**) been sent here under the guise \/\[____| | service announcement now.
t/[] of a clumsy one armed kid to /\ /\\(OO)/ I know I want to raise
_/\_ protect all of you from harm. \__/ awareness about ninjas."
I will not fail you."
| "Pig/cat, you are kind and /\ /\ "Good luck one armed ninja
| /\ someday you will be ____| x x | kid. I am thankful that
|(**) rewarded for that kindness. \/\[____| | the Ninja Strike Force was
t/[] But now I go, as you say, /\ /\\(OO)/ there to teach you all
_/\_ to raise awareness." \__/ they know."
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
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> The following is a paid service announcement that you may be interested in <
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We were all children once...
(some of us still are...)
We all have goals...
(that guide us through life...)
We all dream...
(of the future...)
Someday, well find the work...
(that makes us happy...)
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> BUT! <
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/\ /\
/ \ / \
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\ \/ /
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/ \ \
/ \ \
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/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / \ \
/ / How come \ \
/ / nobody ever \ \
/ / says \ \
/ / \ \
/ / "I wanna be a \ \
__/_____/ NINJA when I \_____\__
(_________) grow up." (_________)
/ X / \ X \
/ X / | \ X \
/ X / | /\ \ X \
/ X / |(**) \ X \
/ X / t/[] \ X \
/_____/ _/\_ \_____\
Don't you think it's about time we live in a society where any child from any
background can grow up saying he wants to be a ninja when he grows up?
Support your local ninjas today.
If not for us, then for the children. Support your local ninjas in the names
of your children who are protected all hours of the night by the stealthy ones.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
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> NINJA LOVE <
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(Dedicated to all the members of the NSF, wherever they may be...)