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Addendum Issue 063
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Addendum
URL: http://www.adden.tr.cx/
Issue# 63 : Keys o keys where art thou?
3rd June 2002
Author: Steak
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| ######### |
| # ### # | have lost my keys, Loosing ones keys is a very
| ### | distressing process, a loss of security if you will,
| ### | goes through your brain. You keep flashing through to
| ### | everything that you now cannot unlock. All the places
| ### | that used to be accessible but alas are no more
| ### |
| # ### # | It is very unfair.
| ######## |
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Tis annoying, for would sell my soul for the knowledge of where they
lieth.
For I possessed them last nighteth, being round my neck they were,
but now I have no idea where they lieth
So in an attempt to find my keys I have made a pact with the devil
that if he should helpth me to find my keys my soul should be forever
his.
I have found my keys.
Oh wonder oh joy, for my keys are now once more around my neck.
I have been able to locate them and I am now able to unlock my padlocks
and door locks and indeed lock locks. I will now once more be able to
go forth into the world of the man, proud and happy in the knowledge that
I can unlock certain locks and the mystery of my missing keys are well
and truly sorted out!!
And i now wish to message to my enemies who may now be rejoicing in the
streets in the news of my eternal damnation to hadies, neigh I say to you
neigh. And not like the horse who the backwards country lad lieth with,
but nigh as in the negative answer to a question.
For it was not by the devils hand that I found my keys, but by the hand
of god. For i used my brain, a device that the heretics will tell you
came from evolution but did not and came from (like all else) the word
of god. Yes my brain, and my soul that was given to me by the redeemer
himself.
For I thought in my head of where I had traveled the night before and I
re-traveled (no less by astral projection) to the places I had visited
last night and I re-traveled to the place of relevant where I rested my
hyde on the midden heap where I continued to move my bowl in humorous and
strange ways. And I re-traveled and re-remembered that my keys around
my neck were so much of a burden that I could not facilitate my bowl
movement in such a way that I find non annoyeth. So I removed my keys
and placed them on top of a lonely pile of papers, after which there
was a nock on my abode's door and in my haste to answer the door and not
anger my potential friend i placed down my current paper on top of
my keys, obstructing it from my feature view.
Alleluhya! Alleluhya! for I have found them, I ran through the town
in the ecstatic mood that I am, "for I have found them!" shouted I
"I no longer am stuck in a rut."
And the moral of this story, That once ones things are lost they
can be found again not my the ways of the man but by the ways of the
lemon.
Rejoice and denouse all lemons for they are sacred and will be
forever be given halo's in the kingdom of god.
amen
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Addendum
(C) Steak May 2002
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