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Activist Times Inc. Issue 077
77.
Sheldon: Soy milk. Helping Stone. Wednesday. Jim.
3am. May 4. 1997. Live from Oneida, Wisconsin, it's ATI. Activist Times, Incorporated. With your e-host, Prime Anarchist.
<applause>
And now, the PAP #'s run. (Prime Anarchist Productions has been running numbers since the number 23 was first invented. Oy. Go figure.) http://www.el-n-gee.com
http://www.execpc.com/~tran/crossroads/MHF http://www.musicsource.com/vodou.html http://www.madrab.demon.co.uk/hackhull http://cust2.iamerica.net/blanc1/new/hack.htm http://www.sjmercury.com/drugs/postscriptstart.htm http://www-unix.oit.umass.edu/~jashaw/abbie.html
Ah, bookmark this.
I got your bookmark hangin,
Up your bookmark.
CALENDULAR. did you say calendular? I SAID, CALENDULAR.
he said calendular. THIS IS NOT A TYPO.
May 2, 1967 was the first Black Panther Rally.
October 25, 1997 will be the first Million Woman March.
Oh, did I forget to mention http://ils.unc.edu/garvc/blues4.html ?
LETTERS 2 THE EDIFACE:
Prime, please write me your new address.
Manuel.
dictador@rocketmail.com
yes i've received ati- i like it lots thanks :)
-anon-
How much are ATI ads?
NewMan. 215
Video Documentary About Frame-Up of Mumia Abu Jamal.
X-Pressions Bookstore
5912 North College Ave.
Indianapolis, IN. 46208
(ed. note. As you can see, they are phree; signed, me.)
What is that!!!!!!!??????? CIA? Conspiracies? Whoa. Somebody's smoking a lot of gangha. Nice article. Your stream of consciousness is your best stuff.
DP. 617
I must be seriously ill for saying this and i know that someday i shall regret ever conjuring up such notions, but i actually preferred reading your drivel than the other crap you sent me. after a few lines of that innane garbage i just clicked down unless i saw something profound. to make a long story short i clicked down the whole damn thing. wondering point: do you know where i can get my hands on the anarchists cookbook? i am sure you or some of your fascist buddies could point me in the right direction.
DM. 414
<prime anarchist makes sound> see ATI issue 3. paragraph 14.
MARC WEISENHEIMER'S TIPS FOR ANSWERING THE DOOR -----------------------------------------------
If someone's selling investment folio's:
Can I retire on it next month? If s/he's showing a new carpet cleaner:
How's it do on all hardwood floors?
If they're selling encyclopedias:
Can I just keep all the pictures?
A new milkman's in towne; just like old tymes:
Can you get me feta cheese?
Environmentalists looking for $help for mother earth:
My vegetarian lifestyle does more for this planet
Than any package, program or plan could ever
Begin to propose.
Someone seeking conversion to their brand of religion must Suffer to hear:
I'll show my garden if you'll show me yours. (Matthew
7. 15-20. Keep it in context, bub.)
If Jesus should show up:
You like coffee, right?
WHILE I WATCH 32 SECONDS OF "BIMBOS THROWING STARS AND NUNCHUCKAS" by The Allniter
Dear Sorority Girl.
Your Cessre Piccini leather handbag contained:
Emery board in each pocket.
2 bobbie pins.
Spearmint gum.
1 dress $26, 1 blouse 12., 1 pr shoes 32. (receipt)
note: Don't forget to be at the Ice Cream Social 10:30-11:30 friday Your $14 dues are due by Sept 30.
"Help us to carry out this year all the plans we made last year & Thru our work and play together, bring us closer. Help us all to co operate in a true spirit of sisterhood."
"Heavenly Father, we thank You for Your help with the difficulties of last week, we ask that, as we begin preparations for fall rush, You help us to see all things in perspective. Help us to keep small upsets from depressing us, & to always have a cheerful word for our sisters, even during the hectic times."
Yr. book pictures. wed. 5.35
your 75c on your dues. Don't forget your coed sweatshirt for all
3 rush parties.
make sure your Halloween costume has the frat's colors in it.
When voting -- don't forget her character, tact, sincerity, forbearance, appearance, character, intelligence, femininity, scholarship, extracurricular activities, her social interaction with decent and socially acceptable people.
Oh, and their activities IN school too.
-30-
Prime Response: It was as good for me as it was for you, yes. Allniter: That was even better than bustin' in the Masons!!!
SLATS GROBNIK'S SEANCE
by marco99@juno.com
Mike Royko died this week. This is the closest to an obit you're going to get from me. I called Slats Grobnik on my cellfone this morning at midnight and asked him if he wanted to call up Dick Daley's dad, my uncle Abbie, and his creator, Mr. Mike "Common Man Columnist" Royko.
He faxed me a paper ouija board pronto. So, on ATT conference call
we said all the majik words while staring into that A-Z, yes & no piece of commonweight copy paper.
This is what we got: (mojo nixon, eat your farty old heart out)
Mikey baby, come back from your 3:30 pm stroke & aneurysm. Bring along with you Abhof and Mikey Dikey too, we said in unison over teleconnect. Can two people make unison? OK. In perfect stereo. OK. Low fidelity. ANYWAY!
"Ubi Est Mea," was his response.
"OK," I quipped. "$40."
"70 with dear Abbie, 72 to bring Daley."
"Deal," Slots and I shouted all stressed out.
In a flash of light, Abbie Hoffman, Richard Jesus Daley, Mike Royko and Slots Grobnik appeared in the seats around me in my little white '86 Ford Tempo. (that's a clue for you fedz. wake up)
A 1955 Royal manual typewriter smashed a big spider web into my windshield. "Why did I have to die this week," Royko asked rhetorically lighting a Lucky Strike. "The Brewers are gonna win a streak."
"I think it was a stroke," said Slots.
"If your mother says she loves you," Said Abbie,
"CHECK IT OUT." we all joined in laughing and drinking Linenkugels.
Abbie Hoffman drank a friggin O'douls, can you believe it?
"What's a matter Abbie," asked Daley, Chicago's most hardassed mayor
in almost 100 years, "afraid to mix it up with your phenobarbs?"
"Low blow," Said Abbie breaking the O'douls over the once-mayor's head and grabbing his testicles with a vicious squeeze. "This is for my nose." "Boys, boys, boys," said Royko. "Settle down. Water under the bridge. Let's all let bygones be..."
Just then I smacked into a mean guard dog who'd escaped from an infamous Chicago Mafia auto-towing operation.
"What the hell is the Mafia doing in Milwaukee???" asked Daley?
"Hoping to talk the Latin Kings into moving in on the Oneida's bingo take." I'm going to miss you Mike Royko. Godspeed you old hack.
RODMAN NOT WELCOMED ON OPRAH.
theme and variation excerpted and expounded upon from Prime Anarchistociated Press reports.
NEW YORK - Talk show host Oprah Winfrey has dropped Dennis Rodman from her show because his new book is too risque.
The Chicago Bulls star, published a new book, "Walk on the Wild Side" just one year after has "Bad As I Wanna Be," left the number one New York times slot. The Rodman segment on Oprah was scheduled to be taped last week and broadcast nationally last Wednesday.
"After reviewing his new book we decided it would be inappropriate to promote it to our viewers," Winfrey said.
Oprah, you idiot. Don't block Rodman because his books are
too racey. Block him because the fonts are all messed up. Tell him he's a stupid Wired-Magazine-Wannabe. Tell him his content's good enough for a standard 10 point times-roman or a roman light, or even a gothic. But
for crying' out loud Dennis: Pick one type and stick with it. You made my eyes water.
FRANCE SIGNS CUBA DEAL, WARNS U.S. NOT TO INTERFERE.
The preceding headline didn't need a story under it.
Brevity sufficed!
MARC FRUCHT'S GUIDE TO THE UNABOMBER'S MANIFESTO.
Part 6. (Continued from ATI 75.)
145. Imagine a society that subjects people to conditions that make them terribly unhappy, then gives them drugs to take away their unhappiness. Science fiction? It is already happening to some extent in our own society. It is well known that the rate of clinical depression has been greatly increasing in recent decades. We believe that this is due to disruption of the power process... In effect, antidepressants are a means of modifying an individual's internal state in such a way as to enable him to tolerate social conditions that he would otherwise find intolerable. (Yes we know that depression is often of purely genetic origin. We are referring here to those cases in which environment plays the predominant role.)
NOTE 26. ... if a society needs a large, powerful law enforcement establishment then there is something gravely wrong with that society; it must be subjecting people to severe pressures if so many refuse to follow the rules, or follow them only because forced. Many societies in the past have gotten along with little or no formal law-enforcement.
CHILDREN OF WOOD AND METAL by Shadow. (Part III of a multiple part fiction piece. You could kill me and never get Shadow's real name!!!)
He reached the side trail that lead to his cabin; walked his bike
the last few hundred feet and at last sat down in the yard to rest. He poured a dipper full of spring water over his head and most of it dripped off his long, tangled mat of hair. The next cool dipperful slid down his throat, though some of the water spilled and caught in his untrimmed beard and his dusty, threadbare black shirt.
That was a relief. Relax. Forget about it, he told himself,
already knowing that the advice was futile.
He'd only read the article once and already the words were emblazoned in his head. The curse of being a genius with a photographic memory.
"...a professor of biology at Caltech says he has discovered a genetic marker that can identify the potential of criminal or antisoc behavior. If such traits can be corrected in early childhood, many social instabilities could be eliminated."
Ted put his hands over his ears. "Shut up." But it was no use. <Tune in next week when Ted eats a carrot and ponders Vivaldi, Beethoven and Modern Social Psychology.>
JOURNAL POEM 7 by Marc Frucht (for those who don't already know, Marc is the above ground Prime Anarchist. HINT #2 for you dossier people...)
Write a song called "Parchese With Two Pieces Missing,"
just So the reviewer can say
"And the band played Parchese with Two Pieces Missing."
From center lake the mountain Has powdered sugar on top:
From 7000 feet athlete's foot falls off.
I just flew in from Aspen and boy are my lips chapped.
Shopping for goods in a snowy sleeveless thing,
Reagan shaves half his head; half for brain surgery,
Half for the press.
I just got a job in Aspen and boy, Suzy Chapstick
Looks anorexic.
Monkery is an only business.
You ever seen a moose relieve himself?
Cruising' Denver in a kevlar sport coat, the sassafras' mittens Make me homesick for Connecticut.
And the band played Schmaltzing Godzilla.
Papagayo's chilitos & cheese. Onion salsa's free too.
Zing. During Dogma Doug's dobro solo, Hurricane Hugo
Hit Havana hard.
Thunder & Buttons eating a buffalo burger listening to Marley's "Buffalo Soldier" during thundershowers: veja du.
I just rode a horse from Aspen and boy are my chaps ripped.
Blue corn tortilla laced with saut_ed jalapenos- quite the bite. Like eating at the maco shark while he's still alive. And wet. A green card isn't white any more - it's pink.
Only thing worse than "tennis elbow?"
Bicycle-butt.
Never mix Tang(tm) with water from a mineral spring... Explosive.
553 a.m. A cold peppermint moon, eating
Cold pizza - pineapple and peppers.
How many loggers does it take to build a cinder block
house?
Depends how many eagle nests.
They're building a tunnel from Arizona to China.
Called a strip mine.
In a $185 leather day pack knapsack, I'll look really Bohemian, holy cow.
I just rode my bike to Aspen and boy am I chaffed.
That's all s/he wrote.
address all correct ponderings to marco99@juno.com
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