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Activist Times Inc. Issue 114
MENDICITY 101 by Marc Frucht. May 20, 1995
I've been told I can't:
Beg, bum, canvass,
Freeload, hustle, idle
Linger, loiter; lolligag:
Mooch, panhandle, solicit
Sponge or tramp.
But I don't think anyone
Has ever had enough spine to
Look me eye to eye saying,
"I don't want you to
Play your guitar here."
Welcome to ATI issue 114. The first Sunday in February, 1998.
Hygienic weekend for those of you in-the-know:
The Special Onion Issue.
Dedicated to Topless Vegetables.
I'm prime anarchist and this is the numbers run for 2131 hours.
http://remain.com
http://www.not.com
http://www.onion.com
http://www.theonion.com
Prime Anarchist Productions' contributing editors Crick and Crack,
the Grackle brothers sat in the 3rd and 1st rows at Bob Dylan's
1st '98 show and then neither interviewed him NOR threw onions at
him, but they did get this in to Marco:
http://www.downcity.net/downcity/current/dylan.html
SAY IT AIN'T SO JOE
by Prime Anarchist
Paul Harvey for Walmart, inc.
This t-phile is tear-stained, people.
Why?
Why?? Why?!?
I believed in you, Paul. Your dad too. What happened???
Paul Harvey, you're a bigger sell-out than the
Mighty mighty Bosstones.
There is no joy in Scudville.
Next thing you know Saddam Hussein'll be hawking Pepsi products!!!
AAA TTTTT IIIII
A A T I
AAA T I THE RAG READ ROUND THE WORLD
A A T I
A A T I
A A T IIIII
Well, Clinton's pissing me off too. Here's a quick op-ed
from your's truly. $2000 incentive for anyone putting
solar panels on their roof Bill Clinton said. State of the
Onion address. Bill you dork. Call it what it is. Stop lying
to us. Your penis, I mean your nose, is getting bigger than
your nose, er, uh, I mean your penis. That wasn't your idea.
Carter put it up for 3 years
and then Reagan killed it. Now you. Makes me wonder who
thought it up BEFORE Carter. Probably Eisenhower!!!
You want history to smile upon you Billary, make all busses
free in every city with a smog level of 10 and up.
WARP. Woodworkers Alliance for Rainforest Protection. Now that's
a concept. Somebody get me that URL.
/\
/ \
/ ! \
/ !!! \
/ PRIME \
/ANARCHIST \
/ SUX SHIT \
\ What some/are saying about the 3rd Midweek Crisis. (wednesday
end of January)
(the bill clinton one if you need to keyword search)
"So when is the next issue of ATI comeing (sic) out?"
gore@whitehouse.gov
"Sorry, I don't have time for this kind of stuff. Good magazine
but who cares if he leaked?"
Hans T.
Utrecht School of the Arts
"I'm sorry I cannot respond to your query. I am employed to
support developers (programmers) Consequently, I cannot justify
providing customer-level support."
splitterofinfinitives@apple.com
"Can't be for real. Clinton could never deliver a speech
that short. ;) "
RS 860
"Prime Anarchist Sux Shit."
happy@thekeyboard.com
CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: The information contained in this transmission
is considered by the sender to be confidential. This material is
intended only for the use of the recipient named above. If the reader
or other recipient of this material is not the intended recipient
named above, please notify me and delete this transmission. Thank
You.
New Verse To Joplin's "Mercedes Benz."
Lord won't you buy me
Virtual Reality.
Been slaving my life away
Please help me to see.
Worked hard all my lifetime
Paying all these bills
(for me)
Lord won't you buy me
Virtual reality.
THIS IS OUR PEACE DIVIDEND??? by the Prime Anarchist.
Your household homer.
Or was that your homely housemate?
Heavenly Whorehouse?
Wholehearted half-ass?
Heavenly hash.
I spent $37 on a peace sign at 7-11
$27 for a tie-dye at the mall
17 bucks for a Bobby Dylan CD.
'N 7 dollars for a friendship bracelet
at Wal-Mart.
Lord it's expensive to be a hippy these days
God I hate it when they charge you to drop out.
Look at my button fly bell-bottoms
They're 501's with an attitude.
Cost me $75 for an hour at the range
To rip these bullet holes
in the legs.
Isn't it cool when you say
Groovy, neat-o and bananas all in
The same sentence?
I had granola, milk, bananas,
Yogurt and a bran muffin with my
Steakum sandwich.
Can I put my Goodwill purchase on Mastercard
Or visa?
C'mon dude. McDonalds lets me eat.
Lord it's avante garde to be Yippie, these ways.
I flash a peace sign at my
Drill sargent and he waves his
Bamboo love beads at me from around his neck.
Peace is a force to be reckoned with.
Forces of peace. I'm a peace-force.
I'm the hippy from hell with my
VW superbeetle pre-restored and painted
Dayglo.
Only costing my dad $259 a month and he
Doesn't even make me pay for the insurance.
And it takes super-unleaded too.
I spent $37 on a peace sign at 7-11
$27 for a tie-dye at the mall
17 bucks for a Bobby Dylan CD.
'N 7 dollars for a friendship bracelet
at Wal-Mart.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
/Part 2 (continued from issue 111) of the Infinite Onion /
/ Prime Anarchist Interview /
/ will continue in issue 115; for we went long. /
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Send all contributions and whatever else to:
ati@etext.org
Free subscription to this weekly zine can be gotten at:
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Just put:
SUBSCRIBE ATI
as the entire message.
Get back issues at
http://www.angelfire.com/wi/kokopeli/cygnus.html
We end with a poem because:
After the world pops;
myth is all we got...
PLATH CAN'T PUT A BRUSH IN A POEM BUT I'LL PUT
IN AN ATTEMPT by the collegiate.
I really can
It can't be too hard, can it?
Here I'll try to build a poem
Which has a toothbrush in it.
It's a small one
But the bristles are hard, sort of
A poem with a softer brush
Might be harder to have heard of.
Does this work?
Or does it kind of flounder, for you.
Here I apply some cleansing agent-
In case of blunder. Wouldn't you?
For your grin,
A toothbrush -- a little poem, take it
My gift, uplifting scrub hold the handle
A chance, like Plath with plaque I took it.
Not half bad
At least it doesn't fail, badly.
Maybe it even pulls a smile
From within, when you feel badly.
That's it.
Prime saying
If you payed for this
You
Got
Ripped
Off
...
