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Activist Times Inc. Issue 173
BEGIN ---- cut here ---- ati173.jpg
PSST!: I'm not letting any of you
help me with this week's 'zine.
It's called "Operation Team Player."
Tax Day cometh on the New Moon.
Are you fully braced??
**************
** Hootmon, **- - - - - - - - - - .
************** 371 /
/ (oops, reverse that) /
/ /
Activist Times, Inc. ATI is a - -
journalistic, causistic, /
/cyberpolitical /
/organization, / 4 more info?
/trying to / send SASE's &
/help y'all, and us / e-stamps???
change the world / to:
radically, in less / ATI@etext.org
than two minute /
increments. /
- - - - - - - - -
Happy Spring Ahead, Happy Fertility,
Happy Easter. And while you're at it
you might as well set your clocks - on
everything you got that counts - to 1971
See? Voila. Instant y2k compat.
Even your toaster!
As if.
Who bought a toaster with a timer?
You, id-i-OT! Did, you, not, know,
you can be kicked, out, of Dexter's
La-boooor-atoory, for that?
Now, I shall have to, disable your
timer, so it will be y,2,k comPATible
for I do NOT, think you will reMEMber
1971 or 1972.
Greedings, phellow shortsighted
hu-person beings, it's Saturday, April
3, 1999. In the year of our Arm-a-gettin.
Live, from Madeline Albright's
knickers-drawer in the Lincoln Bedroom
it's ATI. hACTIVIST, TURVY & ILLIN'
FROM THE PUBLISHER.
helo
welcome to ati issue 173.
A pretty little one. Not many
submissions. Hint, hint...
Well? What else can I say?
Have an ice day.
-prime-
U want #'s We got #'s.
http://thebird.org/host/dcdave
http://www.theofficenet.com/~redorman/welcome.html
http://www.thepentagon.com/primeanarchist
http://www.thepentagon.com/barataeletrica
http://www.freespeech.org/kokopeli/frucht.html
http://www.angelfire.com/wi/kokopeli/frucht.html
http://nexgen.annihilated.com
http://netropic.speakeasy.org
-=[=-=(You are Reading, A T I.)=-=]=-
----------------
THE MORNING MAIL
----------------
to ati@etext.org
Mind-it, your FREE personalized
tracking service from NetMind,
has detected new changes in:
"Hee Yun's Little Home"
Click here to view the changed page:
http://mindit.netmind.com/go/1/15562693/3304475
[by the way, was your paper
wet this morning?]
Some of you have asked for more
information on the Vanishing
Prayer video, so I am posting
them for the benefit of all.
Please post:
Vanishing Prayer is a summary
of Black Mesa events dating
back to the 50's and more
general Dineh historical
information.
Topics covered include:
John Boyden
Public law 93531
Coal Slurry Line
Uranium mining
The bennett freeze
The UN summit at Glenna Begay's
Livestock impoundments generous
amounts of cuts from "Broken Rainbow"
A plea for help from Bonnie Whitesinger,
Roberta Black goat etc. Burial Site
desecration / Sacred site etc.
The music is incredible (Fritz)
and John Bennally is singing
the "Big Mountain Song".
-Mauro
meyesol@eudoramail.com
to ati@etext.org
You People Suck.
Nick-Toons (212)
To The Editor of ATI:
Why don't you do a special
edition devoted to worms?
-Robert (718)
OK, how bout a pome?
I get my strength from the Ocean;
Don't care how much you pollute it.
The sand itself is my hour-glass,
No matter how much you dilute it.
----<><><><>----
Cryptic Warning For When
Viruses (or is the correct
plural "virii??" like the
Melissa or Happy99 come
whipping through.
S/he who well remembers
Edit and especially Edlin,
[ok, Notepad will do THIS
TIME...] is not lost.
So brush up on your
i's and e's, eh?
Pronuncing Guide to Question Marks
? = <eg.> Or is the correct plural virii?
?? = Or is the correct PLURAL VIRII?
??? = Or is the CORRECT PLURAL VIRII?
?!? = OR IS THE CORRECT PLURAL VIRII?
?!?!? = YOU F*?KING B*ST*RD WHAT'S THE
CORRECT PLURAL FOR VIRII???
=)? = I hope you have a nice day, didja?
-=+=6=(You are Reading, A T I.)=9=+=-
STOP! - -
/ - \
\ /
/ \
: US :
: PS :
: :
: :
Important Customer Information.
Because of heightened security the
following types of mail may not
be placed in recepticle:
1) Things that tick.
2) Things that hum.
3) Things in wooden boxes.
4) Hallmark cards with "songs" inside.
5) Anything to military FPO's.
6) Anything bigger than a breadbasket.
7) Sounds like beer.
8) Rhymes with ROM.
Bring these to an official
USPS site Instead.
CRACKER: I NAMED IT AFTER A WOMAN
WHO WOULDN'T GO OUT WITH ME.
---------
by Nilda Perella
Prime Anarchist World News
---------
Princeton, NEW SHIRT - One week after
the stunning e-mail virus named
"Melinda" began stomping out forest
fires all over the world,
authoritarians said Friday they had
beaten up a man who created the 24
hour bug in his bathroom and named
it after a woman who refused to have
sex with him.
David S. Long, 6, was arrested
Thursday night in a gentlemen's
club restroom.
"I was going to name the virus
Erpes," said Long, "but it was too
short. The most common charges
against Long include Coy Interruptus,
Conspiracy and Theft of Conspiracy,
Phone Sex, Lamerism and Dweebishness.
Long was released on $35 bond and
told to sit in the corner for a time
out.
"He had a little willy," said
Melinda S. Tripper, in an exclusive
P.A.W.N. interview on top of a table
in a dark smokey room. "That's all
I'm going to say, and you can quote
me," she said shaking her you know
whats, obviously still effected from
yesterday's happenstance. She went
on to say she wouldn't date him if
he were "the last Cracker on earth."
"Besides," said Melinda, "he's
got pimples. Ew. And he uses AOL;
yuck!"
-=+=-=(You are Reading, A T I.)=-=+=-
PAWN - OWA - (obit w/ attitude)
Memphis, TENN. Graceland was in chaos
this morning when Elvis Presley was
hit by a stray cruise missile.
"I think Elvis was happy to die,"
said Barry Rustler, chief executive
officer of Money Worldwide, which
represents the estates of dozens of
the world's biggest celebrities.
Born in 1869, according to
Rustler, Elvis was 130 years old.
-=-=-=-=-=-
And hot off the financial pages
of our robust website,
DOW MATCHES WAITING LIST AT
DC SOUP KITCHEN
Georgetown, - "10,023 people will
not eat today," said Yahoo A.
Digital, a worker at the Olive Branch
FoodNotBombs daily feed in Washington
DC's smallest inner city, "unless
more food comes in quick." He was
heard repeating this to all eleven
postal workers who will begin a
cropwalk from DC to Bangor, Maine
looking for them that caused their
hunger.
"Perhaps look at Bath Ironworks,"
said Digital for the dozenth time,
"or Raytheon, Newport News and the
Oval Oriface.
-=+_/[=(You `R Reading, A T I.)=]\_+=-
By now you know, we almost always end
the zine with a poem or a parody.
This Parody-Poem is produced by the
letter P.
ADDICTED TO COFFEE - Retort : ROBERT PALMER
The lights are on, but you're not home
Your coffee pot, empty, alone
Your heart sweats, your body shakes
Another cup, is what it takes
You're in deep, you ought to eat
There's no doubt - you're half asleep
Your throat is dry, you're like a seed
Another cup is all you need
Chorus:
You like to think that
you're imune to the stuff
Oh yeah
It's closer to the truth
to say you can't get enough
You know you're gonna have to face it
You're addicted to coffee
You see the signs - but you can't read
You're running at a different speed
your heart beats in double time
another cup and you'll be fine
A one-track mind; you can't be saved
Oblivion is all you crave
If there's some left over for you
You don't mind if you do
Might as well face it:
you're addicted to coffee
(repeated many times over
the same scheme as the refrains)
Solo:
The lights are on, but you're not home
Your coffee pot, empty, alone
Your heart sweats your teeth grind
Another cup and you'll be fine
Chorus:
Might as well face it
you're addicted to love (8x)
Today is /\
Day /17\ of
\ / pie2K
\/ !!!
send anything.
ati@etext.org
